Christmas Lesbians

Christmas Lesbians
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I first learned of the unexpected lesbian in An Unexpected Christmas when I saw a tweet come across my timeline from some straight mom somewhere in like Kansas screeching about how not even Hallmark Christmas movies are safe from The Homosexual Agenda anymore. Which is true in more ways than this woman could have known when she had her little Thanksgiving social media fit. In fact, An Unexpected Christmas wasn’t even on our radar because of all the other queer Christmas movies landing this season.
For example! There’s Carmilla star Elise Bauman ‘s Under The Christmas Tree, coming to Lifetime. There’s Bomb Girls ‘ star Ali Liebert ‘s Every Time a Bell Rings , coming to Hallmark. There’s Tello’s new holiday rom-com, Christmas at the Ranc h. Netflix’s 12 Dates of Christmas features a whole stocking full of bisexuals. HBO Max’s Santa, Inc .’s got Gabourey Sidibe as Goldie, an openly bisexual reindeer. Vh1’s got RuPaul’s The Bitch Who Stole Christmas featuring all drag queens. There’s even a Keira Knightley / Lily-Rose Depp holiday horror movie called Silent Night that’s gay and coming to theaters. Three years ago we had was Carol and that was it!
Should we do “body heat to stay alive”?
Absolutely not that’s our trope stay away from it!
Anyway I love unexpected lesbians, especially when they ruin Christmas for homophobes, so this little Hallmark ditty was a hit for me! It starts out with some straights, Jamie and Emily, stealing one of our best fan fiction tropes — fake dating! — as they attend Jamie’s family’s wholesome family Christmas good times. But that’s just whatever, because when Jamie and Emily get home for the holidays, we meet Becca, Jamie’s sister, who just happens to be a divorced lesbian and single mom who steals the show. She’s able to halt Jamie’s incessant whining with her wry verbal smackdowns! She’s got her own subplot and is more than just a sounding board for the main characters! And she has one scene with Jamie that actually made me laugh out loud for real!
Everything else in the movie is just copy/paste from other Hallmark holiday films, which is fine, honestly; that’s the reason people watch these movies. It also makes Becca’s unexpected gayness even more subversive. This was one of Hallmark’s first rollouts of the season, with no hint of the queer subplot. You’ve got suburban Christian moms in middle America dozing on the couch to the tune of jingling bells, leftover turkey tucked into the fridge, when out on the rooftop, what should appear? LESBIANISM!
And actually, Becca’s not even the biggest surprise of the movie, but I don’t want to spoil that for you. I mean. I do. But I won’t.
There is not one single vegan option on this entire menu, you hetersexual monsters!
My favorite thing about Becca, though, is that she’s single. There’s kind of a wink toward a romantic connection, but it is by no means the center of her story. Well-written single lesbians on TV are almost as rare as Rudolphs, and with the holidays already orchestrated to make single people — especially single queers! — feel weird, it’s actually really nice to see some happy single rep out here!
An Unexpected Christmas has already premiered on Hallmark, but it will air again about three hundred more times this December, including tonight at 10pm.
Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle senior editor who lives in New York City with her wife, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, the Gay and Lesbian Entertainment Critics Association, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Twitter , and Instagram .
Heather has written 1387 articles for us.
Consider all of these results my official pitches for absurd lesbian Christmas movies that should be made! Get at me, Hallmark!
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"Janeane Garafalo stars as Helen, who considers herself a witch first and lesbian second."
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Clea DuVall manages a real Christmas miracle in Happiest Season by capturing the distinctly queer and quietly heart-wrenching experience of not being able to share your real self with the people you love most, when all you want to do is shout from the tallest chimney in town that you've…
the woman with the “absolutely not that’s our trope stay away from it” looks like she won a Cobie Smulders lookalike contest- is she our Becca?
She also SOUNDS like Cobie Smulders! It’s uncanny!
I was half asleep while my mom watched this movie last weekend and I had the exact same thought-I was like, “Why do all the people in Hallmark movies look like photocopies of more famous actors?”
Also, I did not finish this movie because Jamie and his weird toxic “How dare you have a better career than me” issues made me super grumpy.
HBO Max’s Santa, Inc.’s got Gabourey Sidibe as Goldie, an openly bisexual reindeer.
Please tell me someone at AS is planning to review this.
There is a lovely queer surprise in Lifetime’s “A Picture Perfect Holiday”.
Can Autostraddle review it, please? ….. Thanks.
We have watched many Hallmarks shows: but we will NOT watch any shows that promote the gay/ lesbian transgender behaviors. Use your talents to promote wholesome family values- We will pray you will see God’s truth about His family. Have a Blessed Christmas.
literally, but like in the figurative sense…
I support your stance I love a traditional romantic movie.
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