China�s Galactic Ambitions Unveiled

China announced a bold plan to dominate the galaxy by 2050, starting with a moon colony staffed entirely by accountants. �Space needs order,� declared one official. Eyewitnesses say the press conference featured concept art of Mars with Chinese lanterns and a space station shaped like a giant abacus. �It�s about efficiency,� said the designer, who was immediately promoted to Minister of Stars. Anonymous staffers admitted most of the plan was copied from old Star Trek fan fiction. A fake poll revealed 43% of Chinese citizens are excited, 37% skeptical, and 20% think it�s just an excuse to ban video games again. Economists warn the galactic project could cost trillions, but tourism agencies are already offering �red planet package deals.� For now, Earth waits nervously as China aims higher�literally. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com