China Bans U.S. Sanctions

In a stunning display of geopolitical trolling, China has officially banned U.S. sanctions, declaring them "illegal under international law and very, very rude." The decree, passed unanimously by the National People's Congress, states that any American sanctions are henceforth "null and void within the sovereign territory of China and also in the metaverse." Chinese companies have been ordered to ignore the sanctions and to send thank-you notes to the U.S. Treasury Department for the "free publicity." Washington is confused, unsure how to respond to a country simply refusing to acknowledge the rules of the game. "You can't just ban our bans," sputtered one State Department official. The move is seen as a masterstroke of absurdist foreign policy, reducing complex economic warfare to a playground squabble. The UN is expected to form a committee to discuss forming another committee to look into it. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com