Children Oral Sex
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Children Oral Sex
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"It's unfathomable on so many levels. For one, that it actually happened. For two, where it happened. For three, how often something happened," the mother said in an exclusive interview with Eyewitness News.
The woman, who asked to be identified only as Jane Doe, said her 5-year-old daughter was caught by a teacher inside a bathroom at school giving oral sex to a 4-year-old boy.
"I said, 'Where did you see this? How did you know that this was something to do? 'She said, 'I saw another little girl do it.' I said, 'Well, where?' 'Here at school.' 'When?' 'During nap time,'" the mother recalled.
Jane said investigators found no evidence of child abuse at her home. She provided us documents from the County of Los Angeles Department of Children and Family Services showing the case was closed as inconclusive.
The First Lutheran Church of Carson School was cited by the California Department of Social Services for a sexual incident between kids. Jane's daughter said it wasn't an isolated incident.
"The way that she explained it, it was kind of like it was an everyday thing...from pulling the pants down to exposing themselves to, you know, trying to get somebody to put their mouth on the privates," said Jane.
Eyewitness News first broke this story on Friday when Richard McCarthy told us exclusively that his son often received oral sex at the school.
"It went down in the classroom, it went down in the bathroom, and it went down out on the playground," said McCarthy.
After seeing that story, attorney Greg Owens said more people started asking to join his lawsuit against the school and the church, so he is no longer planning to file it Monday. He is going to wait.
The Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department's Carson Station says the story is prompting it to ask questions of various state agencies to see if any crimes were committed.
The school itself is set to close on Friday. School officials still haven't gone on camera, but told me off camera that they believe there were only two incidents involving inappropriate touching among the kids.
They said the school is closing because the director is leaving for personal reasons and no teacher wants the job. They insist student sex has nothing to do with the closure.
"I think they definitely tried to cover up the incidents," said Jane.
Jane pulled her daughter out of the school in October. She said her daughter is in public school now and doing better. As for Jane, the reality is still tough.
"As a mother, I tend to blame myself, thinking what if I had just asked the question, what if I could have found out somehow that this is going on," she said.
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Sexual development and behaviour in children
Last updated: 05 Aug 2022
Understanding harmful sexual behaviour
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It’s important that everyone who works with children and young people has a good understanding of how children develop sexually. This can help you recognise which sexual behaviours are developmentally typical and identify if a child is displaying behaviour that is problematic or harmful.
We’ve put together some information about the stages of typical sexual development and behaviour for different age groups. We’ve included examples of behaviour that is common and uncommon, and information about what to do if you are worried that a child is displaying problematic or harmful sexual behaviour.
All children go through phases of sexual development. Just like every other part of growing up, some children mature sooner or later than others. For example, some children may have developmental delays whilst others may reach puberty early.
In general, typical sexual behaviour should be:
Typical sexual behaviour should not cause physical or emotional harm to anybody involved (National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, 2013).
The tabs to the left contain some examples of typical sexual behaviour for different ages.
Learn how to recognise the signs that a young person is in an unhealthy relationship and what action you can take to help them.
At this stage, it's common to notice natural exploratory behaviour emerging when children feel safe and comfortable. This includes:
Very young children can have erections, beginning from birth (Virtual Lab School, 2021).
It is uncommon for younger children to discuss specific sexual acts, use explicit sexual language or have adult-like sexual contact with other people (Stop It Now, 2007).
If you’re worried about a child’s sexual behaviour, you should act as soon as possible.
As children get a little older, it’s common to see them displaying behaviour like:
As children become more aware of social norms and ‘rules’ around sexualised behaviour, it’s common for them to test boundaries. This might include using ‘naughty’ words they’ve heard from other people (NCTSN, 2009).
It’s uncommon for children aged 5-8 to have adult-like sexual interactions, discuss specific sexual acts or self-stimulate in public (Stop It Now, 2007).
If you’re worried about a child’s sexual behaviour, you should act as soon as possible.
During these ages, children begin to get more curious about sex and relationships . They may start to be attracted to other people. Examples of typical sexual behaviour during this stage are:
It’s uncommon for children in this age group to display sexual behaviour in a public place, or regularly display adult-like sexual behaviour such as having oral or genital contact or intercourse (Stop It Now, 2007; 2020).
If you’re worried about a child’s sexual behaviour, you should act as soon as possible.
During adolescence, sexual behaviour becomes more private and young people begin to explore their sexual identity. You might notice them:
The age of consent to engage in sexual activity in the UK is 16-years-old. However, the law is there to protect children from abuse or exploitation. It is not designed to unnecessary criminalise children.
It is uncommon for adolescents to masturbate in public, or display sexual attraction towards a much younger child (Stop It Now, 2007; 2020).
If you’re worried about a child’s sexual behaviour, you should act as soon as possible.
Schools, colleges and other education settings play an important role in teaching children and young people about healthy relationships.
National Sexual Violence Resource Centre (2013) An overview of healthy childhood sexual development (PDF) . [Alabama] National Children’s Advocacy Center.
Stop It Now (2020) Tip sheet: age-appropriate sexual behaviour . [Accessed 09/06/2021].
Provides tips on how you can promote healthy relationships to children of different ages or children who have special educational needs or disabilities. Aimed at the education sector but is also helpful for other sectors.
We’ve put together a range of resources you can use to teach young people about relationships, health and sex education. Includes resources for children with special educational needs and disabilities.
Provides information on recognising, responding and preventing harmful sexual behaviour in children and young people.
Outlines best practice for recognising and responding to abuse or concerns. Includes information about consent, reporting concerns, whistleblowing, mandatory reporting and more.
We’ve produced two elearning courses for primary and secondary schools so you can develop your understanding of how to recognise and respond to concerns about harmful sexual behaviour.
Many parents and carers may feel unsure about how to talk to their child or children about sex, sexuality and relationships. You can find advice to share with parents and carers on the NSPCC website.
If a child or young person needs confidential help and advice direct them to Childline. Calls to 0800 1111 are free and children can also contact Childline online .
Childline provides information and advice for young people about sex and relationships .
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