Cheese On My Titties
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Cheese On My Titties
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Guys, your over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder man boobs may be preventable.
What few people realize is that certain foods, called “estrogenics,” actually act on men to “feminize” them by reducing their testosterone levels and boosting their estrogen. Save time at the gym battling the unwanted bulk by reconsidering these foods before your next meal. And bulk up "down there" with this essential guide to The 50 Best Foods for Your Penis !
According to the USDA’s Pesticide Data Program, the average person is exposed to 10 to 13 different pesticides every day. Nine of the 10 most commonly used pesticides are “endocrine disruptors,” meaning they play with our male/female hormones. One of the most estrogenic is 4-hexyl resorcinol, which is applied to shrimp to prevent them from discoloration. Other seafood with high pesticide loads: tilapia, eel, and farmed salmon. Avoid them, but don't miss these 20 Weight-Loss Secrets from Insanity Trainer Shaun T !
Phthalates are plastic softeners that mimic estrogen. (The most common, BPA, was actually developed as an estrogen therapy, before scientists found it could help with packaged goods as well.) In a study of canned goods by the Environmental Working Group, canned chicken soup, infant formula, ravioli, beans and tuna had the highest levels of BPA. Instead, make these soup recipes to blast fat, pesticide free.
Conventionally grown produce with edible skins, particularly berries, have among the highest levels of estrogen-mimicking pesticides. Other culprits: peaches, apples, cherries and kale. When choosing produce, look for organic whenever you’re buying food with edible skins. Mix some into these high-protein 50 Best Overnight Oats Recipes .
Unlike the plastic wrap you use on your own leftovers, the stuff that wraps meat and cheese in the supermarket is usually made from PVC (polyvinyl chloride), which leaches into fatty foods and causes hormonal shifts. Instead, buy your meat right from the butcher, and have it wrapped in brown paper. Don't miss our 11 best brand name cheeses for weight loss to satisfy your cravings .
Check the bottom of your water bottle. What you don’t want to see is a #7; that means your bottle is made out of polycarbonate. According to Harvard researchers, people’s levels of BPA increased by nearly 70 percent after drinking out of #7 bottles for just one week. Make a protein shakes instead.
Soy is a plant that contains plant estrogens, also called phytoestrogens. They mimic the same female hormone produced by women to cause the development of secondary sex characteristics, including breasts. High levels of soy are found in soy milk, edamame, tofu snacks and most vegetarian meat alternatives. Make sure you're also not falling prey to these 30 Bad Habits That Lead to a Fat Belly !
What’s more manly than pounding a couple of frosty brewskis? Actually quite a lot, once you consider that beer could be causing your increasingly bodacious ta-tas. All alcohol affects the liver’s ability to get rid of excess estrogen. However, phytoestrogens are present in the hops used to make beer. What’s more, severe drinking can cause liver damage, and because the liver is largely responsible for metabolizing hormones, a less-than-efficient one can convert androgens into estrogens, resulting in an exceedingly feminine chest. Not to mention, they lead to cheat meals , big time.
The main compound in licorice — glycyrrhizic acid, which gives licorice root its distinctive flavor — can suppress testosterone production. In one study, seven healthy male subjects were given 7g/day of licorice via commercially available candy tablets (containing 0.5 grams of glycyrrhizic acid). Four days into the study, the subjects’ total testosterone levels had decreased by 35%. Man up instead using these essential 25 Weight Loss Tips From The World's Fittest Men !
Beets are delicious, nutritious, and just about the sweetest vegetable there is. Like many other root vegetables, they contain compounds to support healthy estrogen levels in your body. That’s great when your testosterone levels aren’t depleted, but if you have an existing hormonal imbalance, you could be exacerbating things by eating too many. Instead, have some potassium-packed bananas .
Marijuana is already legal in several states and could soon be legal from coast to coast. Many people like to add the drug to food, particularly baked goods. Whether you smoke it or eat it, weed can cause increased amounts of breast tissue in men, according to the National Institutes of Health. Studies suggest that, in addition to fueling long stories with no ending, marijuana depresses testosterone levels for up to 24 hours.
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10. sixteen candles first off, you cant mess with this movie. its like a cheese quesadillas, everyone likes it. you've seen it so many times you start counting down in your head to the scene. its like 3... 2... 1... BOOOOWWW. soapy titties all over the place. not only do you have farmer ted bringing the LOLs and cusack in his best role of all time (well, minus better off dead. but hey, doesnt count. no titties) but you have ginny bakers bringing the surprise titties to the rated PG movie. i never got the chance but the 9 year old me says 'thank you'. 9. revenge of the nerds ok, so i know this isn't a titty shot but lets be honest here, betty childs boobs weren't all that great. she was all way too skinny and while her boobs were cute and perky, she was one bad flu away from them turning into sad pancakes. but you cant have a 80s titty list and NOT have revenge of the nerds on it, right? and come on, tell me this picture of booger wearing the greatest shirt of the 80s totally doesn't make up for it. 8. just one of the guys ok ok, yes, i know its weird that she looks like the karate kid for 95% of the movie but just when you start buying that her character is a dude, BAM! she busts those bad boys out for a coup de grace that left my mouth open even while i was walking out of the theater. to this day, whenever i see the movie i still think, "goddamn, daniel-san has some nice ass titties. 7. trading places go ahead, try and talk shit on jamie lee curtis' titties in this movie. ah, see. you cant. its impossible. with that early 80s mom haircut and her prostitute sass, that movie made me want to sell off my he-man collection and fly off to philadelphia because clearly they had the hottest streetwalkers in the world. i may or may not have googleearthed her address. 6. blame it on rio here we have the first movie i can recall jerking off to. this is history, people! now you're saying to yourself, "but chris, this is an outrage! where are the boobs?!?" well here's the thing. apparently actress michelle johnson was only 17 when she made this movie. WHUUUT!?! yep. word is, her parents had to sign off on all the nude scenes. SCANDALOUS! so i'm not trying to have chris hansen knocking up on my door for a blog post, thank you very much. but apparently this didnt stop HBO from airing this gem year after year in the mid-80s. 5. porkys its impossible to have a top 10 list of greatest boob scenes from 80s movies and NOT include a scene from the porkys trilogy. this movie was a right of passage for any boy growing up from the 80s. telling your friends at lunch that you snuck into this movie and saw the infamous 'shower scene' would have gotten you an envious nod from even the meanest of playground bullies. comedy, boobs and more boobs for boobs sake, this is the sergeant pepper of 80s teen skin flicks. all with a bonus surprise message of racial and religious tolerance. 4. fast times at ridgemont high phoebe cates, whuuuut. yes, i know this scene continues to hold the number one spot, i could never fairly objectify her boobs in this movie because i was too busy feeling sorry for her because i knew her boyfraan would eventually ditched her at the dance. plus when she walked in on brad basting off she gave the 'eeeh' face, which made me think that chicks weren't into watching guys jerk off. so minus a few slots for emotionally guilting me into always checking that the door was locked. 3. purple rain if i could go back to 1984, walk inside 7th ave in minneapolis and have the opportunity to be next to apollonia, there is a good chance that the 10 year old me would have sexually accosted her and started yelling marriage proposals while being thrown into the backseat of a police car. uh, and as a side note, can we just talk about how prince beats the shit out of her the entire movie but then does an amazing performance of 'purple rain' that brings her to tears and then she's just all cool with him again? what the hell? 2. mischief dear sweet baby jesus. a full-frontal scene in the 80s? you thought you won the fucking lottery. kelly preston is the pure and pristine beautiful girl from the 50s so when not only do her awesome titties make an appearance but they come along with some serious 80s bush, look the fuck out because if you're a young boy, all other women will be held up to this image for the rest of their lives. this scene was more of a curse than anything. 1. bachelor party no. you're not ready. i refuse to show them to you. you have to earn them. go out and buy this masterpiece right now. im sure you can find it used on amazon for like 2.99. when it arrives, turn off all the lights, put in the dvd and emotionally prepare yourself for tom hanks greatest role of all time. oh, but just when you think the hilarity is too much, the most glorious boob scene of the 80s comes out. from behind the sheer curtain she walks, mouth slightly open, begging for you. its like a full-frontal christmas present that you can keep opening over and over and over again. when you watch it i want you to think to yourself how pre-teen chris was timing it just right and furiously masturbating to that very scene.
Damn I love boobs. I first read this post in work with my boss right behind me. I think I got away with it.
just one of the guys ----- such a good movie. I laughed out loud for "goddamn, daniel-san has some nice ass titties"
I only see two amazing pairs here, Chris. Disappoint.
I only really like two, too. should have posted the bachelor party ones.
ahahahaha "You have to purify yourself in Lake Minnetonka..." Christopher, you are my favourite tonight.
1. Woah. boobs. :| 2. I'm so confused. Kickstarter e-mailed me and needs information. "please provide name EXACTLY how you would like it to be signed on the inside." ..is that my name, or your name? I feel stupid having to ask, but I'm seriously confused.
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