Cheat Wife Tales

Cheat Wife Tales
This is the classic story of the dumb husband staying at home looking after the kids while the wife is out in the company of another guy, not at a dance class or a farewell party as said. I have been doing this so often lately (staying at
home with the kids), in hindsight I am dumber than I thought, (always listen to the little man in your head, he’s never wrong). This is the second time she has been caught; the first she would say was ‘just flirting’. This time is more
serious and 18 months apart since the previous episode. That I am aware of, there could have been so many, I just don’t know or think I even want to know.
She was caught this time when I noticed a txt message from her "Sweet S^^^" while I was in the kitchen and her phone was left unlocked so I simply saw who it was from (a former colleague). The first sentence led to a chain of back and
forward conversations with enough evidence. I then found two emails with more sordid details on her laptop, this has been going on for weeks as far as I can tell, it could be longer, who knows. Once confronted, she didn’t deny it. She said
all of the classic lines, I don’t need to say them, but the classic of all classics, “its not what you think!” Again, as in the previous time she said, she needs to see a counselor to understand why. Whether she will or not who knows. She
didn’t last time and I made that expectation clear as part of reconciliation. I should have insisted!
So after all that, sorry my question is: Can a serial cheater and pathological liar be saved? Would counseling even if sort do anything worth me considering mending this relationship?
It is very difficult to save a relationship when a spouse does not admit the truth when confronted with evidence of their cheating (see surviving infidelity ).
Counseling can help in situations like this. But, there are some guidelines to take into consideration. Just as with every profession (e.g., plumbers, doctors, lawyers, etc.,) there are some truly gifted counselors and some who are not
very good at their job. Also, counseling in situations like this, typically works best when the person seeking help truly wants to change. Being pressured into counseling or just going through the motions is not likely to bring about the
change you want. Also, counseling in situations like this, where there are serious issues to address (and perhaps some underlying personality disorders) can take a lot of time (better to think in years, not months).
You are in the best position to know what is in your best interest. Therapy is not a cure-all. It requires time, commitment, and a gifted professional.
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Truth About Deception

Francesca Di Meglio is a writer, reporter, and editor with nearly 20 years of experience covering everything from relationship to business.

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In the years since becoming the Guide to Newlyweds, I have learned more about infidelity than I ever thought I would. Frankly, most of it makes me sick to my stomach. I've learned of many real stories of cheating - not what you see in the movies but real people being unfaithful - and the consequences of an affair are so grave that I'm not sure how someone can actually go through with it. Cheating on your spouse can end your marriage. If it doesn't end it, it can damage it so badly that it will never be the same.

The stories below are true, but I've left out names and identifying characteristics to protect people. I'm not sharing these stories to air dirty laundry but rather to give you an idea of how embarrassing and devastating cheating can be. If it helps anyone think twice about being unfaithful, then it was worth it. Here goes:

A father and young daughter (about 7 years old) surprise mom at the dance studio where she works. They find her in the altogether with another man. The daughter is confused and traumatized by what she saw. She confides in her classmate, who is the same age, hoping she will get answers. Instead, the classmate just tells the story to her own parents, who now know what's happening in this other couple's marriage. The mother lives with the shame and guilt of cheating on her husband but also cheating on her children - and getting caught by both.

A woman brings another woman into her marriage. Eventually, she prefers the couple's girlfriend to her husband. They divorce and she and the woman continue their relationship while living in the house she had built with her husband. The couple tries to be cordial, but the husband feels awkward. He feels as though he was second best when they had been committed to one another for life at their marriage ceremony. Even though he wants to create a good relationship with his ex for the sake of his kids, his ego has taken a shot and he is not sure how to get over it. He misses his wife, and he feels like a failure .

A couple is all set to walk down the aisle. They have an apartment together, have set a date for their wedding, and even met with a priest. The bride seems to get cold feet a few weeks before the wedding. People think she's just a runaway bride. But it turns out she was having an affair for a long while and was in love with someone else throughout the wedding planning. She moves out of the place with her fiancee and moves right into a new place with her boyfriend.

Two lovebirds start dating in their youth. The years go by and they seem to be heading toward marriage. They take each other - and the relationship - for granted. Next thing you know, the guy is standing outside some other guy's apartment at 2 in the morning to confirm his suspicions of his long-time girlfriend having an affair. Guess what? She walks out around 4 a.m. He was right and young love is good and dead.

A guy gets some bad news, goes to a bar, gets drunk, gets oral sex from a woman he barely knows - and claims to have forgotten when he gets home to his girlfriend, the one he begged to return to him.

Wife receives an anonymous letter suggesting her husband of one year, with whom she has recently lost a baby, was cheating on her with one of her best friends for years. The husband and friend both deny it. But the damage is done. The wife is left wondering - for always - if it's true and why they were mentioned in this letter in the first place. She stays with her husband because she believes in marriage and has no solid proof that he was unfaithful. She doesn't even know who wrote the letter. But she can never look at her husband the same way. Her relationship with her girlfriend is over. They haven't even spoken since the denial.

A woman runs off to Miami with her boyfriend and leaves her teenage children and husband of nearly 20 years with barely an explanation. Even her own father can't forgive her.

Wife finds receipts for jewelry that she never received, and she recognizes signs of trails of affairs her husband has had over the years. Their own sex life ended years earlier. Still, she puts up with his cheating heart - even when he flirts with other young girls right in front of her - until the day she passes away. Now that she's gone, her husband wishes he had been faithful and treated her differently. He misses her. It's a classic case of not knowing what you have until it's gone.

Husband, who has been married for more than 25 years, takes off with the young foreign woman who has been a housekeeper for him and his wife for the last few months. Even though his wife is angry with him for the affair and for leaving her, she still wants him back . She even asks his cousin to try and convince him to return to her. She still loves him.

My Wife Wanted To Cheat, So I Let Her

LGBT

By Hanna Howren

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After my wife and I got married, I admittedly got too comfortable and stopped trying as much as I did when we were dating. When I turned her down for sex one night, she frustratingly claimed that she was going to find someone who’d show her attention when she wanted it and I told her to go for it. It ended up changing our relationship in some pretty big ways.
I never really thought she would do it. She downloaded Tinder immediately and began swiping. This really didn’t bother me because I knew my wife—she’d never have the guts to actually meet up with a complete stranger, let alone actually sleep with one. What would she say? “Hey, my lesbian wife isn’t giving me enough attention—could you help me with that?” Honestly, that would probably score her tons of dates since she was swiping on guys!
She actually matched with a guy and I got a little jealous. Someone else was checking out my wife and she was checking him out too and to be honest, I didn’t really like it. App chatting quickly turned into texting which quickly turned into sexting . Even though I had the privilege of reading all of the messages, I could quickly feel my blood beginning to boil.
I didn’t think guys were competition—hello, we’re gay! Still slightly confused as to why she was so into guys all of the sudden, I reassured myself that men were no match for me. I mean, who knows a woman’s body better than another woman? I knew he wouldn’t be able to do the things that I could do so worrying was a waste of time (or so I told myself).
She surprised us both and actually met up with this guy. WTF? I obviously misjudged her. Seeing her get dressed up for someone else—especially when she rarely does that for me anymore—made me realize that she was serious about looking for someone else and I didn’t like it.
She slept with him and I didn’t know how to react. She came home from her date with the guy all hot and bothered and fell into bed with me exhausted and ready to go to sleep. Either she really did just cheat on me or she’s a great actor. A small part of me was hoping for the latter but a big part of me feared the worst. I wanted to ask a ton of questions, but I wasn’t exactly sure if “Was he as good as me?” was appropriate. I mean, what if she said yes?
Did that mean I could cheat too? Jealousy finally got the better of me and I made a Tinder profile of my own. I loved the thrill of possibly matching with a hot girl—I definitely wasn’t interested in meeting guys—and hey, if my wife could do it, I could too, right? I enjoyed a few dates and loved feeling like a teenager again.
Opening up our relationship actually really turned me on. My wife and I had fallen into a new norm. We loved showing off our matches to each other and I’m not going to lie, there were more than a few threesome fantasies . Though I don’t usually like to share, the very idea of doing so really brought a spark back into our lives.
Our sex life improved after sleeping with other people. We didn’t have a ton of other partners or even meet up with half of our matches, but our few rendezvous were fun and brought us closer. After all, is messing around with other people really that much different than fantasizing about other people during sex? We didn’t really see an issue.
I started chasing my wife all over again. Thinking about my wife going on dates with other people or even just texting them made me feel like I wanted to do everything I could to win her over again. Her eyes were focused on someone else and I had to work harder for her attention; she did the same. We began doing all the stuff we did before we got married and it felt amazing.
Occasionally sleeping with other people doesn’t mean we don’t love each other. Of course we’re in love. If anything, this experience helped bring us back together and remember why we fell in love in the first place. I love that no matter how many matches she gets, it’s me she comes home to at night. Oh, and she totally agrees that a man is no match for a woman.

Hanna Howren
I grew up in a small town where everyone knew everyone and nothing was more important than Friday night football. I attended college and decided to move away with my best friend (now wife). We now live a happy life in sunny Florida and share our house with our multiple animals. We enjoy spending time in nature with our pets and napping. We also enjoy completing DIY projects. Life is good.

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