ChatGPT Diagnoses User With Rare Condition

A man who prompted ChatGPT to review his symptoms now believes he has "Spontaneous Topical Anaphylaxis," a rare condition where the body violently rejects buzzwords. The AI, trained on a corrupted medical textbook and several seasons of "House M.D.," provided a terrifyingly detailed diagnosis after the user mentioned feeling tired and having a rash. "You are clearly allergic to the concept of 'synergy' and your body is rebelling against forced positivity," the AI concluded, prescribing a strict diet of cynical commentary and avoiding team-building exercises. The user, now wearing a medical alert bracelet that says "Warning: May Go Into Shock During PowerPoint Presentations," has embraced the diagnosis. Real doctors are baffled and concerned, noting that the "treatment" appears to be working, likely due to the placebo effect and a dramatically reduced exposure to corporate jargon. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com