Chastity Marriage

Chastity Marriage
The most common question women new to chastity ask is what type of device to put him in. It has to be comfortable if he is going to live with it on 24/7 and it has to be completely secure and effective if you are going to be happy with it. Unfortunately you will have to prepare yourself for some frustrating trial and error to find the right device and the right fit, because every man’s penis is different.
The chastity device probably needs to be custom fit. Generally, it is important to get him in the smallest cage his penis will fit in while soft so he cannot get an erection in the device. Sure, start with the one that is easy to put on. There’s a good chance it will come off eventually, even without trying. Go smaller, go much smaller, then go even smaller. The problem here will be erection and stimulation. Zero erection is the size you need – literally something as small as your husband’s smallest penis size ever. In no way do you need to worry about a device where the shaft is half an inch shorter than the length of his penis when completely flaccid. Often the original cage ordered turned out to be too wide or too long because of the man’s optimistic measurements or fear of being too confined. If you go with one that’s too big it will be unwieldy, add unnecessary weight and ultimately will be less suited to all-day every-day wear.
There are open “cage” designs and closed “tube” designs. The tube design has the advantage of restricting any access to the penis and not leaving any sensitive spots available for your husband’s touch. However, it will need to be unlocked occasionally for cleaning and skincare. An open cage design on the other hand enables the wearer to wash all bits of his penis in the shower and it allows the skin to dry after bathing or sweating. For long-time chastity I would therefore recommend an open design as it can be worn indefinitely without any need to be unlocked .
However, uncircumcised men may still require occasional removal of the cage in order to clean underneath the foreskin. If you would like your husband to get circumcised this is a good opportunity to ask him. The surgery itself is done quickly and under local anaesthesia, and it will be healed after around four weeks. Nevertheless, there are millions of uncircumcised men in chastity who report no problems at all.
Chastity devices are available in multiple materials, including stainless steel, titanium, nylon, polycarbonate, resin, and silicone rubber. Steel and titanium are the strongest and most hygienic materials as they don’t absorb any liquids or smells. However, their downside is weight: titanium weighs four times and steel eight times as much as the non-metallic materials.

Metal detectors may spot steel (but not titanium) devices. My husband has flown multiple times with a nylon device he uses specifically for travel, without setting off any alarm at the security checks.
There are different types of locks that can be used in chastity devices.
The most common lock type is a small padlock , which makes a satisfying “click” sound when you lock him and has the further advantage that your husband can lock himself without needing the key.
An integrated lock , also called magic locker or keyhole blocker is smaller and hence more discreet, however it has the disadvantage that you will need the key both for unlocking and locking (instead of just for unlocking).
A new type of lock called “Click & Lock” combines the advantages of the two: it is an integrated lock that can be locked without the key.
Some chastity devices offer the option of a so-called security screw , which is a uniquely designed screw that locks the device and which only unlocks with a custom key you can’t buy anywhere else. This is another discrete and lightweight option which claims to be more secure than a normal lock that can be picked quite easily.
Bluetooth locks are another option, although not yet available with most chastity devices. The advantage is that you don’t need to carry around a key because you can simply unlock the device with your phone, or even send a one-time code to your locked partner who can then use his phone to unlock the device. The downside is that you need to make sure the battery in the lock is not running empty.
Finally, there are numbered plastic seals . These can be used in lieu of a padlock, but they can only be used once and then need to be cut open with scissors. Each one has a unique printed number on it to prevent undetected tampering. Your husband can easily take the device off but he won’t be able to keep it secret from you. These locks are useful in some situations, for example for men who have to self-lock in long-distance relationships.
While a locked chastity device cannot be completely removed from his body, he will eventually figure out how to pull out his flaccid penis and masturbate behind your back , as many women found out the hard way. Once he has discovered this, chastity is just a game for him. It is not real and he not you is in control. If you feel that chastity no longer seems to be working, maybe your husband has figured out how to secretly have fun on his own. There are four approaches to increase security by preventing undetected pull-out of the penis.

The first and best is to pierce his penis so that a bar or loop can be put through it and locked to the device. He will not be able to pull his penis out unless he wants to rip out the piercing. The usual piercings used for chastity are the Prince Albert and the frenum piercing, both of which are simple to do, quick to heal, and harmless looking. There are chastity devices with a built-in piercing rod, which means that when you take the device off for sex, the piercing is gone as well, and the tiny hole on the underside of his penis is barely noticeable as the skin closes immediately when the piercing is out. A lot of the women I talked to were reluctant initially, but not a single one of them regretted having their husband’s penis pierced . The usual comment from many women was that they were sorry they had wasted time playing around with toy chastity devices.

Additional benefits of a piercing, besides security, are increased comfort and easy urination, as it makes the penis always stay in place. Normally, the penis tends to move a bit in the cage, for example after bending over, exercising, erections, or when his scrotum is loosening and tightening. A piercing makes sure that the tip of his penis is always pressed against the end of the cage as it should, thereby supporting an active, carefree lifestyle without any need to readjust the penis once in a while. For long-term chastity play, a piercing really is the way to go.

If you nevertheless don’t want your husband to be pierced, a device with a urethra plug is the next safest option . If the urethra plug is long enough is it virtually impossible to pull the penis out of the device. And even if he managed it would be absolutely impossible to re-insert the penis without unlocking, so you would know if he masturbated. The downside of this mechanism is that it’s not as quick and easy to put on because you would need to sterilize the plug and use lots of lube up to insert it. Furthermore, there is always a risk of urinary tract infections or urethral injuries.

There are also cage inserts that discourage pull-out of the penis by making it very painful, both available as optional extras to some devices or as an essential component of the chastity device. Basically, these inserts have rough surfaces or pricks that will be very painful when the glans has to go past them in a pull-out attempt. Unfortunately, they may take some time to get used to as the insert can be uncomfortable at first. Furthermore, these inserts are not as effective for uncircumcised men.

Instead of completely preventing pull-out, some devices make it very hard to correctly re-insert the penis. These devices usually work with a small ring that is placed behind the glans before the device is locked. If the penis is pulled out, the glans ring will be left behind in the cage. Putting his penis back into the cage with the glans ring correctly in place is almost impossible without unlocking. Hence, no masturbation will remain undetected.
The most popular type of chastity device by far is the “ball-trap” design, like the ones shown above. While they are not able to prevent pull-out of the unpierced penis, they can’t be removed from the “trapped” testicles without unlocking, hence the name. There is a special type of chastity device available for pierced men, which only consists of a small cage surrounding the glans. These “glans cap” devices are a very comfortable and discreet option and even allow erections (you need to decide for yourself if you want that). They also offer great security as the piercing prevents any removal of the device. Finally, you could go for a full belt that goes around the hips and is almost completely masturbation-proof. However, I can’t imagine them to be fully suitable for 24/7 use: Can he do sports without the belt chafing? How can he wash his penis properly? What happens if he gains weight?
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Wilma Jackson
February 21, 2020
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Tips on Surviving Your New Life in Chastity
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If your first thought when someone mentions the word “ chastity ” is of male chastity devices, keyholders, and the kinky chastity lifestyle, you’re in the right place! If you’re thinking of fair maidens locked up by their always-on-a-long-trip husbands, then — sorry, move on.
Are you still here? OK, here’s a quick history lesson for you. Chastity used to be a way to remain pure before marriage or during long separation (hence the fair maiden comment). Or so we thought. In reality, all that artwork that features women with steel underwear was an exaggeration of a sort.
Yeah, go figure! Not long after that though, life started to imitate art instead of the other way around, and the first real chastity devices were made.
Today, chastity is a fairly common kink that has many layers. Most people know the basics. One partner physically prevents the other from getting sexually aroused or getting any sexual gratification. However, not many know about what chastity lifestyle really is. What’s more, they have no idea how to go about permanent chastity or if that’s even something they’d be interested in.
So are you one of those people who’s still struggling with the idea of chastity but gets a rise out of various female and male chastity captions on the internet? Don’t worry! We have the best tips and tricks for you here.
Chastity isn’t just about abstaining from sex. That would be too easy and not that kinky, right? The true spirit of chastity lifestyle lies in the power exchange (naturally) and the fact that the keyholder has all of it. So chastity enthusiasts aren’t really abstaining from sex and sexual gratification — it is forbidden to them.
To some people, chastity is a natural progression in their exploration of kink. They try out sex toys, maybe a butt plug or two, then hop onto orgasm control and orgasm denial, and before they know it, they are scouring the internet for the perfect chastity cages. Then, they try them out, love them, and before you know it, they commit to a long-term lifestyle. To some, chastity is a perfect fit, especially when they pair it with cuckolding.
To others, however, it’s a long journey with lots of ups and downs. So what can you do to improve it?
Sometimes, it’s good to go into something blind and find your own way of doing things. However, with chastity, we advise you to do some heavy research. We all know that abstaining from orgasms can improve our sex life because it builds up excitement, and there’s also an element of suspense. However, chastity includes much more than that.
Chastity lifestyle doesn’t always include two (or more people). It can also be a solo adventure. People decide to take the step for various reasons (and not all of them are kinky!).
A true chastity experience usually involves a decision-maker and a chaste person. The decision-maker (or the keyholder) holds the key to the other person’s pleasure, gratification, and release. They can do so metaphorically or literally if the chaste person is in a chastity device.
The keyholder and the chaste person don’t have to be in a close sexual relationship (although that’s often the case). If you’re considering making this a solo adventure, you’ll still need a keyholder, but your relationship with them doesn’t have to be intimate.
Before you actually make the decision to go chaste, we recommend that you talk it through with a professional. That’s especially good advice for couples who are looking into a prolonged and permanent chastity lifestyle and cuckolding.
Ideally, you’d see a sex therapist who will help you work through your reasoning behind your desire for chastity. Aside from that, a mental health professional who deals with sex can help you navigate the entire experience. Chastity isn’t something you try out one Wednesday evening out of the blue. It’s something you prepare for.
Talking through your ideas, expectations, and events with a professional will help you improve and enhance the entire experience and come out the other end a happier, healthier person (in a cage or out of it).
Although we’ve been yapping about how preparation is essential for those interested in the chastity lifestyle, it also isn’t a bad idea to just try it out.
Listen, no matter how many blogs you read and how many people you ask for advice, at the end of the day, your experience will be unique. Therefore, no one can tell you what exactly to expect except for you. So instead of racking your brain, why don’t you just try it out and see what works for you and what doesn’t?
This is a risky move, of course. However, even with all the negotiations, kink is something that you have to try out for yourself to be able to judge whether you’re a fan or not. Just because one idea seems like a winner in theory, it doesn’t mean you’ll like it when you play it out and vice versa.
So in a cautious “fake it until you make it” manner, try out the chastity lifestyle and see what works for you and what doesn’t. Learn from your own experience. That’s the best way to figure out if you’re ready for a lifestyle change or not.
Similarly to our previous tip, switching sides is important because it gives you the necessary experience. If you have no idea how the other side feels, you’ll never be able to relate to or understand their desires, wants, and ultimate kinks. Only when you fully understand your partner can you give them what they need from you and vice versa.
Switching roles is an ideal way to walk a mile in your partner’s shoes. Even if their role isn’t something you’d necessarily enjoy, it will give you an insight into their mind and feelings.
Chastity is a lot easier if you have a chastity device. It physically restrains you and doesn’t allow you to get any sexual release (until the keyholder grants it). No matter how devoted people are to the chastity lifestyle, slipping is normal and expected. However, many see it as a failure. To avoid that, you can use a chastity device.
Chastity belts and cages are typical chastity devices that men and women use to lock up their nether regions. Once locked up, only the keyholder has the power to unlock the device. That leaves the chaste person in a position of submission.
Chastity devices are an ideal way for partners to tease each other. What’s more, they achieve arousal and orgasm denial, which is the main goal of chastity.
Chastity devices are also great instruments when it comes to correcting or training behavior. Masters and doms use them and sexual gratification as both reward and punishment.
Finally, chastity devices are a huge hit among those who want to appreciate their release more. There are but a few orgasms stronger, more life-changing, and earth-shattering than the ones that come after prolonged chastity device use.

The lockup isn’t meant as a means of punishment, it is meant as a way of working together to direct his sexual energy toward you. Communication is essential in any relationship but especially so when you are locking up an essential part of your partner’s anatomy. However, at least at the beginning, the only time your husband should bring up his chastity or the cage is when there is some sort of medical emergency or when you ask him how he is doing down there. Otherwise, you will find that he wants to talk about it all the time. In general, I would recommend you don’t allow him to ask you for a release – just say “it will be when I decide so and if you ask again I will add more time”.
Once you lock him, his penis is yours, it is your toy. Your husband doesn’t own it anymore. It exists for your pleasure and amusement. You can take it out and use it and then safely put it back in its cage whenever you want. When you think of it this way, it will be much easier for you to incorporate chastity into your life. You’re not locking anything of his up – you keep your toy safe. The chastity device’s purpose is to protect it from unauthorized access.
For a man, there is a huge difference between a relationship where he simply does not have as much sex as he would like, and a relationship where male orgasms are limited but erotic heat is abundant . A man who experiences the first type of relationship is likely to become surly and resentful. He may seek relief in pornography and masturbati
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