Chaos Is My Love Language

Forget "Words of Affirmation"; the new love language is chaos. Partners are expressing devotion through last-minute plane tickets, "surprise" parties where the guest of honor isn't told, and dramatic fights that are resolved with grand, over-the-top gestures. Therapists are calling it "adrenaline bonding," where the relationship is fueled by constant, low-grade crisis. "It keeps things exciting," said one devotee, whose partner recently woke them up at 3 a.m. to go find the best tacos in a different state. "If we're not mildly stressed, how do we know we care?" The trend has spawned couple's retreats focused on "structured spontaneity" and relationship coaches who specialize in manufacturing manageable drama. The goal is never boredom, even if it means a constant state of emotional whiplash. It's love, but make it a thriller. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com