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Okay ladies, I want to ask you a question. How do you get out of a car, when you're wearing a skirt?
A) Keeping both legs together, I swing my feet out of the vehicle, then stand up. Durr.
B) Well, first of all, I make sure I either have no underwear on whatsoever, or a pair of teeny-tiny panties that cost more than your mortgage, bitch. Then I open the door and flop one leg out as far as I possibly can. Bonus points to me if my knees are at least 5 feet apart -- good thing I'm so flexible from all that yoga! -- and the actual interior of my uterus is visible. I wait there until I'm sure every photographer has had a chance to capture the special moment; then, depending on how incapacitated I am, I stagger the rest of the way out and scream at my assistant to bring me a drink.
Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and Paris Hilton have all clearly chosen Option B in years past, but even squeaky-clean Jennifer Aniston was recently photographed with her hemline hiked up over her thighs. And a few days ago Britney was up to her old tricks, somehow managing to get the bottom of her dress to expose her naked butt as she sashayed into a Johnny Rockets in LA, where presumably the menu included burgers, vanilla shakes, and Disgraced Pop Star Booty.
Celebrity junk-sighting has become so common there are websites devoted to these "accidental" flashes. The Superficial has an entire category titled "Upskirt," for crying out loud. (For the love of everything, do not click the Tara Reid pictures. My eyes! MY EYESSSSS.)
I guess I'm willing to give some of these incidents the benefit of the doubt. I mean, sometimes limos are real low to the ground and hard to get out of. Sometimes there's a wardrobe malfunction that can't be prevented and the paparazzi snapping you from every angle are bound to catch an inopportune moment. Sometimes ... uh, well, hmm. Maybe certain celebrities have a life-threatening disorder where if their vagina doesn't get fresh air on a regular basis, they asphyxiate. Won't somebody think of the vaginas?
What do you think, are celebrities doing this on purpose for the attention, or are they continually falling prey to a combination of bad luck and available cameras?
Summer camp is a staple of American culture. As soon as school's out, camp gears up and takes tons of kids and toddlers (yes, toddlers have camps!) for the day, or weeks at a time in some wooded area. It's a time for the kiddos to get away from the hustle-and-bustle of life, to interact with other kids their age, and -- most importantly -- give parents and guardians the breaks they so desperately need. Some parents have never been to camp before, while others are veterans. But of those who have some kind of experience with it, camp comes highly recommended. As one mom wrote for CafeMom: "It establishes independence -- Sure, going into a new situation where they don't know anyone can be a little bit scary at first, but kids need to learn to be comfortable being away from their parents."
Camp does other cool things for kids, too, like giving them routine, a mental break, and keeping them active. But with camp comes (dun dun dun) the packing. Now, packing for anything isn't anyone's favorite thing. Packing for a kid doing something that's not entirely known is even harder. And with some camps banning care packages from home, it is essential to make sure they're sent off with what they need -- even if they're in day camp. Days are long, usually wet, and there's nothing worse than not having a towel, sunscreen, or other essential.
This is why we found it vital to compile a list of obvious and not-so-obvious things parents can pack for their children who are going to camp. Some things are must-haves for camp (we can't stress sunscreen enough, it's so vital!). But other things may or may not be on camp lists (some camps send those) but may be helpful or fun for the kiddo to have. Take a look below and happy packing!
Kids can never have too many pairs of socks, especially at camp. If it rains, there's mud, and that means soggy, dirt-filled socks. Pack some back-up pairs -- and then some back-up pairs for those.
The sun shows no mercy to those playing outside in the heat for hours. Make sure the kiddos are hydrated by giving each their own insulated water bottle to keep the water cold.
Kids and backpacks go together during the school year and having one for camp is no different. Use the one the kiddo already has, or one like this to make sure things that are on this list are packed and easily accessible.
Cuts and scrapes are likely to happen at camp. If the nurse's bandages fall off after a swim or from sweat, having cool ones ready to replace it will be handy.
When things get hot, it's not always easy to cool down -- especially out in a grass soccer field or humid bunk. Send him with his own mini-fan so he doesn't overheat.
Mosquitoes love camps as much as kids do. Protect them from itchy bites by making sure bug or mosquito repellent is in their bags.
No one can have too much underwear. And being out in the sun all day, then swimming, and having to put on the same sweaty pair of underwear reinforces that. Pack extra in case camper is looking to feel a bit refreshed.
This one is deeper in the list, but arguably the most important. The sun's UV rays are strong and protecting camper's skin is vital. Protect LO by packing sunscreen and teach her how to reapply. This mister will make it much easier to do.
Washing hands is not always an option out in the woods or before heading to the mess hall. Help campers feel a little bit cleaner with their own personal hand sanitizer (camp rules permitting).
Cell phones are usually a no-go at camp. And even with them, reception isn't too great in the backwoods. Provide paper and stamps for LO to write home and tell about all of the cool stuff she's doing.
Between sitting outside on the ground for camp games, or productions or group meetings, back-sides can get sore. Save kids some pain and send them off with a "Creek Chair."
Don't let hair get in the way campers scoring the goal or hiking, or whatever activity they're up to. Send them off with a bunch of headbands.
Kids out in the elements need a towel to withstand those elements. Get a strong one, like this big REI towel, meant for drying off the more rugged types.
Lips can get chapped or burned in the heat and there's nothing worse than not having lip balm to fix it. Send the camper off with a lip balm of choice, like this pack of cereal-flavored ones.
Friendship bracelets and camp go together like peanut butter and jelly. Send the kid off with his own string to get the party started.
To add another layer of protection from the sun, have the little camper take a cap or baseball cap. It'll allow her to play without the glare of the sunlight beaming in her eyes.
There's bound to be free time, down time, or a rainy day at camp. Give the camper something to do with friends in the form of playing cards. Go fish!
Superhero Playing Cards ($9, Oriental Trading)
Speaking of rainy days, it's good to have the appropriate gear for it. Why have a soggy sweatshirt when camper could pull out a rain jacket?
Campers love swimming with goggles. There's just something totally rad, dare we say mermaid or merman-like, that is being able to see completely clearly under water. Give the kiddo that gift by packing a pair of swimming goggles.
No camper is too old to bring his favorite comfort object, if he wants to. Don't forget to pack it! It'll make the homesickness easier to cope with those first few nights.
*Psst: if you choose to purchase an item from this post, CafeMom.com may receive a small cut. Each item and price is up to date at the time of publication; however, an item may be sold out or the price may be different at a later date.
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