Caught Wacking Off

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Caught Wacking Off
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Last night a noise woke me up...I rolled over and my husband quickly removed his hands from under the covers. And rolled over on his side( facing away from me). I reached under the covers and his underwear was down and his dick was hard. I tried to rub it becuase i was thinking about giving him a bj but the position he was in wasn't good and wasn't letting me do much. So I just fell asleep cause I was just too tired!! Im not mad at him for master bating, actually I rather enjoy to watch him...but I think he is too embarrassed to do it in front of me:/ cause I've told him that I want to watch and he says no! But I have caught him master bating several times before and he just stops what he is doing and goes back to sleep. And i usually pretend like i didn't see anything and go back to sleep...What would you do?



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I caught my husband masturbating for the first time this weekend in our 11 years together. I’ve always know he did it but never saw/ caught him in the act. It was middle of the night 3am, I had forgotten my water bottle in the kitchen so I went to get it. I noticed my husband wasn’t in our bed and I walked in on him, pants down and jerking off on the couch. Part of me was shocked and asked him what he was doing, he was just as surprised to see me, stopped and his quickly pulled up his pants and didn’t say anything. I quickly grabbed my bottle and walked back to bed. I stayed awake for hours because of it. I think I was just too shocked and also felt unsexy myself and sad. I’m 30 weeks pregnant and with a big belly. I’m pretty sure he was watching porn as he had headphones on and phone in hand. Next day I wanted to talk to him about it but just couldn’t bring it up. Part of me was ashamed. I want to try sex during pregnancy but my husband is weirded out by it. Should I bring it up again as I’m still thinking about it. Has this happened to anyone else?
it’s normal to masturbate for anyone.
The porn thing is a no go in our relationship. It has been a big issue and I finally had to tell him that if it continued, I was done. My husband has made no effort during this pregnancy for anything sexual. Although I have had a lot of bleeding issues and was put on pelvic rest a while back. I don’t think he would of made the effort even without the bleeding issues. We have other issues or I have other issues with him, he unfortunately doesn’t see any issue 🙄 So ai have become very resentful and haven’t made the effort for anything sexual either. I think you need to talk to him if it’s something you are uncomfortable with.
Nah, just the first line was for you but the rest of it was for most of the replies to your post. I just didn’t go about tagging everyone. But for you, I think everything you said is valid.
I think you replied to the wrong person
It's totally fine if you're not cool with it. For everyone who doesn't care, good for you but don't bother giving advice to someone who isn't comfortable with it. She isn't, you don't have to understand.
Right? I’m very confused of what the issue is here. When I’m not in the mood, I give my husband a kiss, tell him I love him and ask him to watch porn instead lol 
I think everyone telling you that masterbating is normal and not to worry about it, isn't really a fair answer. Everyone is different and every relationship is different. I also don't think that EVERY guy watches porn and masterbates. If you feel uncomfortable, I would definitely bring it up. You're extremely emotional and you're carrying his child. To me, that means something and in my opinion, he should take that into consideration before getting his rocks off.. ESPECIALLY if you're saying he doesn't even try with you
Why does your husband watching porn make you uncomfortable? I honestly don’t understand the problem. 
I think it’s normal. And porn is so readily available that even though I don’t like the idea of it- I also think it’s normal. 🤷‍♀️
I have the same thoughts as you on this one.
Personally I’d just move on and not worry about it... but that’s just me. My husband masturbates and watches porn and so do i.. we’re pretty open and comfortable with all of it though.
Same. It’s better then him cheating with another woman and lying amd making excuses
same here. Its just a fantasy and I have zero suspicions of him cheating.
same in our relationship we both watch porn. sometimes together
If your husband is watching porn though and not being intimate with you then it’s an issue.
agreed. You need to talk to him about it.
I do not think is a issue if he is doing it sometimes.. I am not sure what my husband is doing to "relieve" himself, he doesn't talk about it, and I am more open than he is. We haven't had any intimacy since week 20 (now I am in week 32) and in our last conversation he told me he doesn't feel comfortable having sex while I am pregnant, that he doesn't want to hurt me or the baby.. we tried once and he gets really nervous and it just doesn't work. 
I am always about honest and direct conversation to see what the real issue is.
I would just let it go. Masturbation is natural and normal. He was probably embarrassed to get caught, so I wouldn't say anything. Many men are uncomfortable having sex during pregnancy. It is ok to talk about that if you want.
My husband isn't big on sex during pregnancy, especially the first baby. I've never caught him in the act but I'm sure he does. I do, especially when he's not into pregnancy sex. I'd probably make a funny comment about it but I don't think it needs to be a talk
Ah definitely an awkward situation, but totally normal and you will move past it! I def wouldn’t want my husband to see me doing the same thing- but meh! It’s ok.
I'm the same! I'd feel uncomfortable if my husband walked in on me getting myself off. I have a dildo and he doesnt even know about it! lol I recently bought it
Lol i bought a dildo recently too & my boyfriend has no clue about it
My husband had a serious porn problem before we got married. I highly recommend very honest, candid conversations about it. the more secrecy, the more shame and hurt both of you will feel. I've told my husband I totally understand if he needs to masturbate during the stretches when my sex drive is non existent or during the 6 week wait post partum, we just make sure to communicate (and more often than not, I'm happy to give him what he needs in some form or other). for me, the biggest thing is just being open with each other so neither of us feel ashamed of our sexual needs or struggles.
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