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Where do I start ….. I think my son started using drugs when he was at secondary school……I ended up kicking him out of my home, he stole from me, was intimidating etc…. I gave him this month towards his rent he gave it to a dealer….. To keep the house he has to pay most of this months wages to housing…. They have asked me to pay ten pound a day till the end of the month for petrol to get him to work….. I am tired of it and my finances are taking a nose dive but I feel so guilty what should I do. He needs to admit he has a problem and seek help. And avoid everyone to do with coke. Delete all there numbers and come off social media, and take up other activities. Im in the same situation but i dont get my self in debt and you could say i have it under control… well sort of. Im lapsing once a month. And im 4 week clean today.. But the main thing is he needs to want it.. Omg I feel your pain…. My son… I feel is in the same position…. I give him. Money for fuel…. But he should have money for that as he is in a well. Paid job. Think we need to be tougher on them. And having hurt my mother about 10 years ago in similar ways, I can also relate. The more people try to advise, the worse it can make things. And for those closest, the despair, the hurt and their own feelings of well, guilt. The bewilderment will lead to a range of emotions. My mother never gave up on me. My mother loved and loves me to this day. During those dark times it was her and my sister that remained throughout. Sometimes understanding, and sometimes anger. Always hurt and pity in their eyes. But they never judged me. The only ones. What helped me was changing my surroundings. Yes I wanted to change. It was nearly too late. I had no money, I was with people that were aware of my situation, but i also had no access to the substance and was in a situation where i had to get on with things. No one forced me. Thanks for sharing that, I always find it really interesting listening to the addicts mindset, because from the outside it all seems mad and so irrational. My husband tried many times to get clean, moved away various times, but each time he found ways of obtaining drugs, or switching one drug for another. He stopped coke but continued taking codeine etc. Comes into play. I worked on me and left him to do as he wanted. It was then, he chose another path for himself. When my husband was deep in and using lots, nothing could have convinced him otherwise, once the money began to run out and I stopped caring, it seemed to loosen the grip. I worry the dealers will hurt him…. I hope when he has lost everything he will wake up……the other thing is a while back he took overdose of paracetamol and alcohol…. Thank you both….. I feel bad and guilty and tearful….. Firstly you need to back away, preferably with love. I recommend that you seek help, try Al anon they have been a life saver for me. They show you how to live again, how to regain some sanity, because I know how hard and emotionally draining it is. Hi Kate, I feel your pain and empathise with you wholeheartedly. They have a 15 month old son too. We have been naive in the whole situation and honestly thought things would change if he moved back home. The last year has been the worst I have ever known him to be and he admits to having been doing cocaine since he was a teenager. Today I checked a coat pocket of his where I knew there were used tissues and rolled up receipts and a scratch card that he obviously sniffs the lines from. His wife is a nervous wreck and she has now filed for divorce. He has literally made us all pathetic, helpless and broke. As B said he is paranoid about his wife having affairs accusing her of all sorts. She has now filed for divorce. What happened to our lovely, talented son????????????. Never mind the credit card bills and the debt collectors threatening to come round. I too am a nervous wreck, feeling pathetic and broke. He was also the life and soul and well respected as a hardworking man and good husband. It does sound very much like our situation….. I hope that losing everything will wake him up…. I think if it doesnt sooner rather than later he will be dead…. I cannot have him home as I live with my daughter and 7 year old grandson who I will not put at risk……. Some really brilliant posts. And how as an addict you become proficient at it. The denial. So many comments from this thread ring home. The cruel to be kind is the hardest. But also the comment about only the addict can stop it is so true. If I could buy an island to treat people I know I could help. Too long winded to explain. There really is no answer. And that may sound like a terrible thought. But what I mean is, there are ways, its finding it. I joined the reserves. But I stuck to it. I was in a place where I had to respect my abode, had good influences around me. And, at the risk of unsettling some of you, an older woman who helped in ways. Ah, so much to try and say. Not saying enough, coming out a bit rambled and incomplete. But be warned, its quite powerful. Particularly for those of us that can relate. I am reading the book at the moment……I wish I could pick my boy up and put him somewhere safe and away from these dealers who wait with their hands out to take all his wages…. I have to take a step away for my own sanity. By the way I understand the comment of an older woman….. Whats his situation now kate? Dont give up on him, theres no greater love than the love for you children. Some people just get in a really bad rut and its so hard to get out of it. I told my mum everything she was crying her eyes out and worrys about me alot. This is just a suggestion.. But i dont know how bad he is at home. So thats up 2 u. Sit him down tell him its breaking u and u dont want to see out bad happen to him.. When he used to live with me it was a nightmare….. If I thought he could change it would be different but I am not sure he would……. I too wish I could teleport my son to outer Mongolia to live a different life, to give him a chance to get clean. When he came home after me tackling him about what I found in his pocket he was not happy at all. I got home just after 4 and he was still in bed which infuriates me. I knew why, it was because it was coming out of his system again! This is what happens so I can read the signs now. He did eventually get up, get showered and go and see his son for a hour or so. He was in a better mood than the previous day and when he came home he was nicer. I wish I could have faith in him. He took an overdose a while ago and a referral was made to the dual diagnosis team but he hasnt heard anything. He works all month then when he gets paid all his money ends up going because he owes to dealers and the other bills just end up not being paid….. Im laspsing once a month on coke. I was doing great friday.. And i took it. If he wasnt there i would of been ok. It is will power but everyone is different. He needs to delete all dealers nums. And even come off all social media. He needs to shut every one out. And no alcohol. Alcohol is a main trigger to get coke. Theres a good app called pocket rehab that helps you. And i recommemd for you and him to watch a video on you tube of.. At least he wants to stop which is great. So bloody sad…. Hopefully he will pay the arrears on the house and will only have whats left to live on. The dealers just want his custom and his money so hopefully he will not have racked up too much debt. Much as I love him and hate seeing the position he puts himself in I know by helping him I am just enabling him so it has to stop. I work for a charity called Icarus Trust which you may find helpful to contact. Please get in touch if you think that talking with one of our trained and experienced people would be helpful to you. You can contact Icarus Trust on help icarustrust. Thank you I will be in touch…. I had a heart to heart with him today….. I know he wants to stop and is upset he lets everyone down. He has kept these dealers waiting as long as he can……so I have told him to pay them off I will take out a loan to pay rent arrears so they still have a home and they will pay me back……I hope and pray he has had enough of a wake up call this time. Hi kate this will sound harsh but dont take a loan out. I am now with a debt management company because of the amount I had going out and I could cope with it. He emotionally blackmailed me say his wife will leave him, the dealers will do all sorts to her and his house and child or he was going to top himself. But sadly there has been no change and his wife wants a divorce anyway. Obviously you do what you feel is best but speaking from experience and from what our counsellors have advised us, do not give him anymore. I have said I will now….. I think I said in my first post my son has payday loan companies chasing him where he has ignored their payments. He has buried his head in the sand in favour of his addiction. This is why his wife is asking for a divorce. What I was trying to say was no matter how much you help him financially because he promises to pay off debts and dealers it will be you who is the loser because he will continue to use cocaine. Myself and his dad have been to group sessions and individual assessments and the first thing they tell you is do not continue bailing them out. I hate this whole situation and I never ever would have dreamed we would be in this mess but I do blame myself for being sucked in to his false promises and lies and should have said no when he first started asking for financial help. Like you though I was weak, sad, bloody scared and believed that he wanted to change. I know he does but hes still not strong enough to stop it. So I wont be giving him anymore money. They will probably have to sell the house in the end to pay off the huge debts or the bailiffs will be in. His wife never even had s credit card before she met him and now she is classed as bankrupt. I really hope your son sticks to his side of the deal for all your sakes x. Your post ring so true to me…. I know you are right in my heart……what do I do …. I know from the past he has promised to pull it round and not managed it…. I make things worse by trying to help …. Hi Kate, he always pays the dealers so this us why he owes the loan companies etc. He too is with Stepchange and so am I now. My husband recently retired and I am 60 next year this is not how we wanted our retirement. The same pattern everytime. I dont know if I can bear that x. He was on the phone last night sounded really shaken……. I should not be put in this position……. No I understand totally….. I am 61 this month, just took out a mortgage for a nicer home to spend the rest of my life in but my savings are going down at an alarming rate…. I will go down with him if I am not careful. I dont know what the icarus trust is but we have been dealing with a local drugs project and they have been so supportive and helpful x. My son is 27…. I feel I have got his hopes up now by saying I would take out a loan for him……I hate all this…. I have given hundreds of pounds to try to help him….. I know really I should have cut off the money a long time ago…. If I thought it would change things I would give him the money…. If you get in touch, one of our trained people, who are very experienced and good listeners would talk with you and may be help you to find a way forward. They would also be able to let you know what other help is available in your local area. I hated it because his voice was shaky and he sounded so nervous….. My head says for his own good let him lose everything maybe it will be the shock he needs……I feel sick with worry I need to decide by next Friday. In my heart I know he will let me down but I hope……. I have found knives in my sons bedroom too. Kate I know exactly how you feel I have been in your position so many times. I can only go by my experience which is ongoing. My son gets paid tomorrow and he owes his dad and me so much but when I mentioned it he said there wont be anything left after he pays out what hes borrowed off of other people so god only knows if his loans are being paid. Hes had such a free ride for such a long time now I really want him to go but I dont have the heart like you. He even uses my car for work as if it was his own. I have been thinking about it constantly if I thought by giving him money for the rent he would turn it around I would do it, but I have heard it so many times. Maybe he needs to see the consequences of his choices. His partner, his family, his home, job, car all gone and by his decisions. It hurts me but he is taking me with him. I feel like I want to Kick. My son out but I know I will feel guilty and cannot do. Wish he would go On his own free will. I have sat and cried this morning. When hes nice now i dont know if its because hes taken coke or the real person i get so confused with all the mood swings. Your son was probably suffering with the anxiety and paranoia that goes with the come down when he called you. He was going to set up standing orders but that only happened once. We were even abroad and I was being hounded. They tell us it is not our problem and help us deal with living with it. There are so many like us Kate it is frightening. I have been abroad and pestered by calls no money for car insurance…. I dont know if they did before she asked him to leave. Its emotional blackmail all the time and because we love them we fall for it. He says since hes been back living at home hes been the worse hes ever been and I think that may be true as hes had it too easy. Before last July he always paid me back if I leant him any money and he said it was because he gambled but if I could show you the begging texts I was getting since last July it would break your heart. Hes admitted the cocaine habit has taken over the gambling! His partner has a friend at her house shouting let him f….. Theres that emotional blackmail again. Its a rollercoaster of emotions and I know we both wish they were not living at home and just go but I would be worried to death tbh. Kate have you googled for help in your local area there has to be somebody else you can talk to who will reaffirm you are doing the right thing by not giving him money. We will always be the bad guys if we dont bail them out. I am Really struggling with all this shit…. With there were more laws legally to help young people like this so it gets nipped on the bud before it all goes totally tits up and before you know it they themselves are dead or somebody else is???? Can you not get the police to sort out the dealers? Sorry if I sound nieve, I am totally lost in all this and not got a clue. Now my worry begins because hes gone out to so say get some tobacco. My deep down thoughts are hes going to get some coke as he gets paid tomorrow. I dont know if this is true not. I hate not trusting him but I just have to wait until he comes home to see how he is. I gave his partner 20 for his petrol and she gave it to him. Sounds familiar……….. I blame myself maybe I gave him hope then took it away but I did say if he paid dealers and put rest to rent I would top rent up but car would go……. Just as bad as me! He went out like I said to get tobacco. I was absolutely livid. I have no idea what hes going to do. He owes so much to loan companies and other people and of course dealers. I will not be bailing him out. I am done with his stupidity. Why on earth did he think he could do this!!! I spoke with his girlfriend today she made a point of saying she only had 20 pound notes in her purse……and she is expecting me to pay his petrol next week……she is really taking the mick telling me that then in the next breath she has no money. God knows….. I am just pulling myself down with him. I was only ever asked for money by his wife once back last October when they were still together. He only got paid today. Hes burying his head in the sand again. Its doing my head in and hes taking the piss out of us. Bed and board for free and the use of my car. Really need to read the riot act but he wont sit down and talk. Because they know they can get away with it……. I am in a decent job but because of all this I am juggling money about so I can pay my own petrol…. I am so tired of it all. I am dreading next week I think he is accepting the fact that his car will be gone. Keep strong Kate. Yes it is their problem so why do I feel so guilty saying no….. I get paid tomorrow and I can see me being out of money by next week. Well this is the day everything falls apart. My sons partner took the children and left last night. I thought about taking a loan but after his partner saying not even that would change things I decided against it…. He seems to have accepted things but is obviously not happy. I just want him to sort himself out…. Will losing everything now teach him something I hope so. He got really nasty when I said no. I had the same 10 he wanted I had already given My payday today and I am not going to watch it all go to pay his bills. He needs to take responsibility now. They will thank us in the end, not now but maybe in years to come. Keep strong xx. I went to a meeting last night for relatives and friends of drug and alcohol addicts. My husband is a nervous wreck, he so worried what the final outcome is going to be but our son seems better after his meeting yesterday. I do hope so……. I spoke to my son lunch time he was on his way to take all his pay out to hand over to these dealers….. How much does your son owe did he tell you, I had a fit my son finally admitted he has to hand over ……I think you would be right to turf him out, we make it to easy I wish I had stopped bailing my son out years ago maybe if I had we wouldnt have got to this position. I am now waiting for him to start asking for money……I love him I want him back drug free. Yes we want our son back too. Whether it was a realisation after he went to his support group or me going to one. He did go out for a pint last night but with his uncle and only for an hour. Maybe he owes money there or hes avoiding temptation who knows. He asked me to go see him last night which I did. As soon as I got in the door he put his arms around me tight and sobbed…. I have to admit I paid his rent but his very expensive car will have to go…. I called this morning and he is on his way to work. One dealer he told his situation to said he hears this so much…people losing everything…. Before Christmas he had over off me that was my buffer I am now starting to struggle financially even though I have a good job. I hate the thought of him losing everything but maybe that is what it will take. Can anyone advise please. Nothing is really changing here, or at least for any significant period amount of time anyways. Bailing him out is enabling him to do what he likes with little or no consequence. Also even more importantly what support and help have you got? Thank you for replying. No you are right nothing is really changing he works but doesnt pay his bills or debts all his money goes on drug dealers and on line gambling his rent gets paid as I arranged for it to come out the day his pay goes in. I am in touch with Drugfam who give me support and of course I have now redound this forum. Can I ask have you been through this yourself if so what did you do. Did it help. I largely come from the other side of the fence as I am a recovering alcoholic and addict. I am in a similar boat to you in terms of having a family member in that situation who simply will not gave up to their issues and bled everyone dry. The result was it made me incredibly ill and they carried on regardless. I had to gradually step away and start to accept that unless they want to change there is absolutely nothing I can do. Thank you for that. It is breaking my heart to see what he has become. With family its so much harder as you want them back, and you want them to be well — lots of people I know pursue this into oblivion as they never truly understand what is happening. When he gets paid the dealer gets his money this month in vArying amounts he got paid then had 4 days off work. CA and NA meetings are online. If you want to do them they afe literally all day every day 24 hours a day. You have to ask yourself what would he do if you had not bank rolled his using and bailed him out? I have told him if he makes any more threats I will call the police. But yes this is going to happen I need to get him healthy and if losing everything is what it takes so be it. Well I have stuck with what I said turned off my phone and not given him money. I woke up feeling sick to my stomach worrying that he will lose everything but if it helps get him straight it would be worth it. Please god this will do it. Hey kate. Well done sticking to your guns. Remember the alternative is funding this habit which could end up killing him anyway. There is no easy option here so stay strong. No I know you are right. I am also four years off retirement do I want to be doing this on a pension and worrying what will happen when I am not here. Of course it was tough. A week ago he texted me out of the blue to tell me that he was in the hospital. He said he was going through bad withdrawal, but that he was going to be fine- he game me no explanations. He said they were keeping him for a few days because they were checking things. I asked him if was going to tell me this story and he said he would when he got home. He went home on Friday and then said he was too tired to talk, but that ultimately he would be fine. Update: he just texted me and said that they kept him in the hospital because his pulse kept racing. All week can do is try as best we can to get on with our own lives as hard as that is to do. Stay strong xx. Thanks Kate1. So, I just had to let it off my chest and then buck up and keep going and living my own life. How is your son doing? Well he went and spent every penny of his wages last month in a weekend so no bills paid. He seems focused at the minute he has gained weight. Payday is approaching this will be the telling point xx. It seems that so many of us are in the same boat. So difficult. We have a28 year old son struggling with cocaine and alcohol addiction and all the debts that come with it. I wish we knew what to do. But I too totally understand that even if these services were accessible, there is still the problem of getting the person who needs it to agree that they need it and to do something about it themselves! You can take a horse to water…etc! I wish I could get my son to just walk……plan a route and walk it…away from all the triggers. A long distance walk over a long period. He has to want it. Anyone else feel the same? I struggled to see my son lose his job and home. Speaking to his workmates I think if he had he would have spiralled down quicker. His work was his outlet. Where he could forget his problems. The only thing I can say is never take your love away they need that. This is one of his quotes that I refer back to often in moments of crisis:. They need to accept they need help, otherwise there is no help out there, apart from counciling for us. They either live or die in my opinion as there is no help for them. Unless they admit they need help???? I think you are right. My son and cocaine This topic has replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 3 years, 3 months ago by kate1. August 14, at pm August 15, at am August 18, at pm Hi there, Firstly you need to back away, preferably with love. August 15, at pm All because of choosing to sniff cocaine when out getting hammered with his friends and family. August 16, at am August 17, at am August 17, at pm Ye i understand kate.. Does he want to stop? August 18, at am To be honest.. My sister knows a drug councillor and one of her clients in the past was a ryan air pilot. Like your husband how his debts are just mounting and mounting and we all suffer……. August 19, at am August 19, at pm August 20, at am August 21, at am Please try and get professional advice from somewhere kate it will help. August 20, at pm Kate just a reminder that we are here if you need us. August 21, at pm August 22, at am August 22, at pm I feel as guilty as hell too but they have to learn. Dont do it you cant afford it x. August 30, at pm August 23, at am Hopefully your decision not to help will make your son wake up too! August 31, at am I pray that they can both be strong now. Good luck xxx. August 8, at pm August 9, at am Hi Kate Sorry to hear your situation. I had a read through the post. Hey kate I largely come from the other side of the fence as I am a recovering alcoholic and addict. Sorry to read that, its awful. Has he ever made any sounds about getting help at all? Is it really going on food or on drugs… Either way I think the tough love approach has to at least be tried. August 11, at am September 21, at pm September 22, at pm September 23, at am July 10, at pm Sorry Kate1… I got distracted from your original question…what should you do about it. July 12, at am You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Keep me signed in. Log In.

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