Brazilian She
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Friend of mine said he caught "60 minutes" show in regards to which foreign women are the worst to marry....apparently Brazilian came in at #1. I couldn't get the details on to why, but he said it has something to do with their culture....they like to marry men for money, gold diggers pretty much.
Can anyone go along with this as far as their experiences with Brazilian women? I heard it's a big party country though.
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I have been very happily married to a Brazilian woman for nine years. I can give some practicle advice to anyone dating, or wanting to date a Brazilian women.
So, Are Brazilian women the worst? My unbiased response is that there is no direct answer to the question. It mostly depends on the guy searching. A lot of guys go after Brazilian women for sex. Let's be honest, they're good looking. You go to the carnival and see the beautiful women, and now you want one.
But If your desire for a Brazilian women is based on the sexual charge of beaches, carnival, and parties, then you will likely find the wrong person. A good looking women who wants money or a visa, will use her looks to get it. she will prey on men who's perception of Brazilian women is sexually based. It is inevitable that the two will find each other.
I can't give a head count of how many women in Brazil are out for money. There would certainly be a lot, just like in America. But, there are also a lot of women who are genuine. Before my wife and I were married, people told me I was making a mistake, that she was only trying to take advantage. And it wasn't just a few people, it was a lot. Likewise, a lot of people told my wife not to marry me. They told her it was dangerous, that She didn't know me, and that I wanted to take advantage. But here we are, safe and sound.
My advise: don't look for a Brazilian women because of some kind of sexual perception.
I have personally met guys who had married Brazilian women that ran off with other guys once they came to America. But, I have also met couples who are very happy together.
As for me, I can say my wife is awesome. I wouldn't trade her for anything. She was the best thing that ever happened to me.
@D87 :
married almost 11 years with my garota carioca....she shames every american woman i was ever involved with.
@D87 :
This is great advice and exactly how i feel actually. Thanks D87 and I'm hoping to have a simialiar story like you. The Brazilian women I've been dating is amazing, thanks for the confidence!
This reply was removed by the author.
I am an American man. I have had 3 Brazilian girlfriends. Each was very different. The first was an unscrupulous unprincipled person. I was lucky to survive.
The second woman is a lovely, well-educated person. She was kind, considerate and quite moral. We just could not make the relationship work between two countries and our responsibilities in each country.
My last Brazilian girlfriend will eventually become my wife. She smart, warm, funny, kind and industrious. She is a wonderful partner.
Each one was very different. Brazilian women are as varied as any group of women could be. There is no reason to judge them as a group. Had I done that based on my experience with my first Brazilian girlfriend I would not have enjoy the wonderful company and amazing experience with the second Brazilian woman.
And, I wouldn't be in this relationship with wonderful woman that makes everyone of my days better.
Make your considerations on who yo marry on an individual basis. You are marrying only one woman not the whole country and culture.
@Brazil :
Wise words! The ill comments on this thread are so contradictory, though. They often talk like we’re the scum of humanity, but I wonder if they’re that much better. I wonder what took them to Brazil, in the first place. What/who made them marry nasty Brazilian women? Only if they could be brutally honest and tell us their real motivations. Then, we’d quickly find out they stand on an equal foot as those they so vehemently criticize. Only if they were honest...
@Fabs :
Based on living in your country for the past 11 years, I give you this as my observation.
If you really want to know Brazilians, look no further than their Tele Novelas.
Novelas mirror everything that is wrong about Brazilians - the shallowness, the lack of culture, the delight taken in being ignorant, the lack of personal integrity and honesty in all areas of life, the infidelity, the vanity and the overriding sentiment that money and status are the only things in life worth cheating your way forward for. No one can be accused of 'striving' for anything here, as that would imply some hard work, although the effort put into finding a short-cut, a trick or a cheat (jeitinho) to get ahead are as close to striving as the culture allows here.
To any gringo\a looking for a Brazilian partner, tread careful, the emotionally incontinent roller coaster is fun to begin with, but after 18 months you always tire of the petulant childish insecurity, plain laziness and unpredictable public outbursts of latin rage. In short do a trade in every 2 years for a newer basket case, keeps it fun. Don't ever marry one, let alone knock one up, and never ever give or promise them money.
Other than that, its a fun place to live so long as you are not reliant on the education, government, health or social system, if you are, you are screwed as bad as they are!
@Realismo :
To make a long story short, since you mention mirrors... Give yourself a good look in the mirror and be honest, for crying out loud! Who are you kidding? Your healthcare is a joke! The White House is filthy! Your police force is brutal! Look at the number of people in jail. You're just as bad. Plus, your petulance to invade other countries and steal their wealth is unacceptable, to say the least... I mean, have a good look into your culture, i.e. trophy wives? I mean, hello! Wake up, sweetheart!
@Realismo :
You completely nailed it. There are tons of them in Boston and every single one of them is exactly as you described. Thank you Sir for the honesty. Do not ever marry a Brazilian woman. They see you as a greengo and nothing more!
@Fabs :
Then why are you here? Brazilians come and never leave, I don’t know one Brazilian who came here and actually respected the visa process and went the hell home. They get a visa they come and they never leave and they get free healthcare at any emergency room in the country. Brazilians are destroying our country like they have destroyed their own.
This reply was removed by the author.
This reply was removed by the author.
Como é que é?! (Excuse me?!) Brazilian woman speaking here. I don't know where this "60 minutes" show got its data from, but being a gold digging woman depends on personal moral values (or the lack of them), not being something one can attribute to an entire culture. So no, we're not gold diggers, you can tell your friend that.
Nonetheless, it makes me wonder why would we be perceived as such... Yes, partying is part of our culture, we're known to be a very joyful/happy (which is more about being very open and warm, charismatic even, despite adversities, rather than actually happy) and sensual people... We're overall free spirits, very sensitive to aesthetics, we enjoy our bodies and aren't afraid to show them; perhaps that might give the impression Brazilian women may be somewhat... easy, which is not the case. Certain cultural manifestations exported by the media, especially on what concerns Brazilian funk, may not help much either.
But overall, we're as "marriable" as any other, and our moral standards can be pretty high.
@StrayCat :
Thanks to your answer... I know it to be TRUE! I am dating a Brazilian lady of whom I adore. And YES Brazilians are very joyful and happy, open and warm along with everything else you mentioned.
@StrayCat :
manucat I am a Indian n I think ur right. cos I know a girl from Brazil and she is really very kind by heart. n thank u for replying to the "60 minute" guy and to give it right on his face.
@StrayCat :
Sorry but Not when they want a green card.
@Americanguy1 :
Again, that doesn't depend on being Brazilian; lack of character and moral values do not depend on nationality.
@StrayCat :
Verdade. Todo brazileiras nao e assim. Eu sei. Amo brazil sabia? Fico Uma ano em minas.perto do valadares
This reply was removed by the author.
@StrayCat :
What sort of value or moral system is advocated to Brazilian society? You cannot really advocate nor vouch for a people having a certain sense of ethics by the absence of good-samaritanship. When it comes to things of mutuality, trustfulness, conscientiousness, exclusiveness, etc, there are qualities that must be preserved and demonstrated with conservativeness and responsibility - not used opportunistically and openly.
No person should look scrutinize one individual to assess some form of judgment on a group as a whole.
Having high moral standards (as you say) is not something you alone can vouch for, especially when there will be people in general who will be scrutinizing women on a larger scale. There are pleasures ok with being shared in a social sense. More intimate pleasures were meant to be exclusive. Prostitution in Brazil is legal. No doubt, this being legal has affected the beliefs and values of women in such a way it diminishes the profundity and meaning of sexuality. It can be explored as much a person likes. Treating it as something that can be distributed widely is more corruptible. There is much more to be said about 2 people who protects the interests, well-being, etc. of one another with continual diligence, vigilance, etc - where more qualities are created. It is part of the idea of two people together are more than the sum of them 2 being together.
When responsibility and high moral standards pertain more to one's own well-being, they do not extend to advocate for any values towards another individual - especially when that other individual may be a potential significant other. Part of the development of moral standards involves creating a value system that not only protects and serves your interests and/or well-being alone, those of others as well - esp. a person whom you may agree to show personal interest in. Those values are then practiced and exercised to be seen as a crucible (testing) of one's character. Then, those values are isolated where you are a subordinate to those values, so that the values reign as soverignty (Authority, not power, entitlement, principles as merit, not entitlement), and that you are subject to the values upon which you claim to have.
One thing is certain with all people, including myself, is that we do not always live up to the values we claim to have. People who claim to be equal or authority in such a high place as the values and/or beliefs they claim to live by presume to be equal to them, or even above them. Why? Because people who create the values they believe and/or live by believe to be above them because they created them. Why? Because that is the idea of one's rights going way too far, one involving the idea of there being so many choices a person can choose from, and just escape when those choices go bad - nothing exactly to do with being responsible and conscientious with choices - especially when a person just sees choices as something available to them instead of the responsibility to self and others with choices. Caring for and maintaining a person's health (not just your own), maintaining a balanced lifestyle between oneself and a significant other (cohesively), interrelating and participating in the things of each other person's lives, maintaining a house, being a loyal partner in their individual goals of the other person to achieve "oneness," planning responsibilities, roles, and personal time with a person, protecting things of the other person (not looking for what/who has the bigger house or better car, and definitely not "trading up.").
This is part of the person living to the values one claims, and not the values living/measuring to the person. There are many differences between the two.
These are things of interdependence, not exactly the same as codependence. They are not the same thing. Any quality there is to be had must be maintained, not hunted for and then consumed. If you are so drawn to things of pleasure, all these things I wrote will not matter to you at all. Your mind may already be fixed on looking for treasure.
Talking about the existence of moral standards is just speaking on the existence of them. People are looking for those who will live them, in real life - not just talk about them idealistically nor existentially in a subjective sense. There is a warmth and welcoming with Brazilians I have made friends with. What people here are asking is whether or not there will be warmth during times of cold, during times of despair, times of difficulty. Any person who says they do not encounter difficulties at all is seriously fooling themselves.
People speak of other cultures by saying things like "gold-diggers" because there are serious risks at stake. People's lives have been destroyed.
In your case, when a person (a regular person) shows you they are serious, you must do the same. Negotiate on quality, not push one way over another.
@Anonymous :
No, I can certainly not vouch for people’s capacity to live up to the morals they claim to follow, but being born and raised inside Brazilian culture, I can certainly assure you “gold-digging” is not something instilled in our mindset, which is what the OP wants to know, actually.
I understand people’s concern and the risks at stake; they’re right to be worri
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