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By Felicia Sabartinelli Published: Apr 7, 2016
People would suggest I get a boob job. But as tempting as it was, I knew I had to love me the way I was.
I’m Felicia Sabartinelli, Colorado actress, artist and writer. You can call me ‘Fe’ but please don’t call me ‘Bye, Felicia’. In my spare time, I enjoy writing my online poetry series, Bedside Photos. I also like brunette men and breakfast foods. Learn more about me @ www.feliciasabartinelli.com
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Today, I know that even if my chest had never grown, I would be alright with it.
My great aunt bought me my first bra when I was 11. She gave it to me on my birthday, when I definitely didn't need a bra. All I wanted was my very own set of breasts. I think I believed that a bra would magically make my boobs suddenly appear – and that I would finally be a woman. That definitely did not happen.
I barely fit an A-cup in high school. I used to wish on every star I saw in the sky that I would be blessed with an ample chest, that I could fill out a shirt without two spare pieces of fabric hanging over where my breasts were meant to be. I wanted boobs so badly that I started referring to them as my "hope chest," because I thought if I hoped hard enough they would suddenly just blossom.
While in high school, I realized quickly how flat I was in comparison to my girlfriends. Also, I couldn't escape the pressure I felt from seeing other teenage girls in magazines, TV shows and movies. I sure as hell didn't look like most of them . I looked much younger – especially physically. Every time I complained, my grandma would remind me, "Mine never came in until I was in my 30s." Well, her chest was huge, so I had to have hope, right?
As time went on, I remained confident but still a bit envious, feeling left out whenever my friends were having conversations that I couldn't be a part of. They'd say things like, "I can't run, it huuuurts !" I wanted to know that feeling! (It also sounded like a great excuse to get out of gym). Even complaints like, "I can't sleep on my stomach anymore…" and "He wouldn't stop staring at my boobs" made me – you guessed it – want boobs.
I would make jokes about my flat chest, putting balloons up my shirt during sleepovers to make my friends laugh. I figured I should make fun of myself, rather than feeling sorry about something that I had literally no control over.
But by the time I started college, I was actively trying to come to terms with my little knockers. I learned how to accentuate my other physical attributes. I had nice eyes and hair, and I had a great butt – but I still wished I had boobs.
Sometimes, people would suggest I get a boob job. There was this idea that surgery would 'complete' my body somehow. That I would be 'sexier' or more 'womanly.' But as tempting as it was, I knew I had to love me the way I was. Even though I wanted boobs so badly, I just never saw that as an option for me.
So, I learned to take all the confidence I had and found a way to be fully happy with my body. I decided to wear cute tops confidently. I didn't stress about wearing padded bras. In fact, sometimes I didn't even wear a bra! And then something great started to happen: I started to forget all about not having boobs. It was no longer an issue.
Then one day, or gradually, things changed. It seemed to just happen. I noticed little gaps between the buttons of my button-up shirts. I noticed a nice shadow effect happening at the top of my chest, a rounding out – something I had never seen before. Then I noticed that they were jiggling a little as I walked. I yelled to my roommate, "OMG, They jiggle! They jiggle while I jump!"
They continued to grow. It wasn't really attributed to weight gain, either. I started out as a 32A and suddenly was a 32B. And eventually, after a few years, I became a C-cup.
Suddenly, I knew the feeling when guys stared at my chest – and, yes, it quickly became annoying. Since I had glorified boobs for so long, I also started to notice that having them wasn't very different at all.
Sure, having a body part that society glorifies is fun for a while, but then you start to realize that it doesn't really fix or change anything. Today, I know that even if my chest had never grown, I would be alright with it.
It's a beautiful thing to have experienced both sides, to completely understand what it's like to have and have not. Not once did I ever consider plastic surgery. I never wore heavily padded bras. Even if I never had that late growth spurt, I think I would be just as confident today.
And you know what else I realized? It never mattered how flat or full my chest was. I should have never relied on something so insignificant to make me feel like 'more' or 'less' of a woman. It never provided me more or less opportunities. It didn't make me any more or less attractive. It didn't make me more or less capable.
You are damn sexy – no matter what size breasts you have. If you want plastic surgery, go for it. If you prefer to rock your chest au natural, at any size, go for it. You do you. The rest will always fall into place.
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BIG Bang Theory star Mayim Bialik stood up for fellow actress Susan Sarandon by flashing her breasts at Piers Morgan following the pair’s recent row over cleavage.
THE Big Bang Theory star Mayim Bialik stood up for fellow actress Susan Sarandon by flashing her breasts at Piers Morgan following the pair’s recent row over cleavage.
The British newsman became embroiled in an online spat with the Thelma & Louise star after he criticised her for wearing a revealing outfit to present a tribute to late stars at the recent Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards in Los Angeles.
He mentioned the feud during an appearance on The Late Late Show this week, admitting women had started sending him pictures of their cleavage to show their support for Susan.
“A very strange thing happened. The feminists of the world decided to punish me by tweeting me thousands of pictures of their own cleavages,” Piers declared.
Fellow guest Mayim then waded into the discussion, telling Piers, “You know what, I identify as a feminist. I’m going to do it this way,” before opening her shirt and baring her breasts to Piers as he roared with laughter.
Piers then exclaimed “Can I just say, I feel duly punished!”
He previously branded Susan “tacky” for wearing a white suit with just a black bra underneath to present the sombre segment at the SAG Awards on 30 January, writing in a post on Twitter, “Would Susan Sarandon wear this to a funeral? No. It was thus horribly inappropriate for an In Memoriam tribute.”
A number of female followers then started sending pictures of their own cleavage to Susan to show their support for her, and the actress retweeted more than 60 of the shots on her own Twitter page.
After he started to receive a slew of cleavage shots from Susan supporters, Piers returned to Twitter to add, “Feminists now sending me photos of their cleavage to ‘punish’ me for criticising @SusanSarandon. Curious notion of punishment ... I’m under cleavage attack ... Seems to be some massive misunderstanding that I am anti-cleavage. I’m only anti-cleavage during In Memoriam tributes to dead people ...”
Controversial broadcaster Piers Morgan has lashed Meghan Markle, and asked her to “back off the rails” and allow Prince Harry’s father to be King.
Australians are questioning a lengthy break for federal parliamentarians after Queen Elizabeth’s death.
Australian breakfast TV hosts broke the heartbreaking news of the Queen’s death to the country this morning.
HARRY ALONE Prince Harry rushed to see the Queen in Balmoral but arrived after death
WATCH OUT I’m a vet & there are 5 breeds of dogs I’d never own
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A MUM and daughter have revealed that they both sleep with the same man - and they don’t see anything wrong with it.
Madi Brooks lives with her husband in the US, but as she explains in her TikTok videos, if she’s not in the mood, she’s quite happy for her mum to sleep with him.
This is because both Madi, her mum and her husband are swingers, meaning they are in open relationships, swapping sexual partners at swinging parties and events.
Speaking in a video, she says: “Me and my mom are both swingers and it’s great, you know why? Because when I’m not in the mood I can just let my husband have her.
“I let my husband have her a couple of times a week.”
But it isn’t just her mum that Madi shares her husband with, admitting that her sister sometimes ‘plays’ with her husband.
She says: “You wanna know how I keep my man happy? I let him play with my little sister.”
Her videos have since gone viral receiving up to seven million views each, with many left baffled by the family’s unusual dynamic.
Commenting, one said: “That’s enough TikTok for one year, I’m out!”
“How did that conversation ever initiate?” asked another, while a third wrote, “I don’t know how anybody could share but it’s your life.”
In other relationship news, we told you how millions of Brits are racking up huge debts to pay for their weddings.
And women are posing for kinky festive £300 photoshoots to make their other halves blush this Christmas.
We also revealed how a Tory MP, 26, starred in a TV show with lover who is 35 years her senior.
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