Biden Astronaut Worth Two Million Votes

By Astrid Holgersson � The satire Biden Astronaut Worth Two Million Votes parodies politics sold as stunts. Eyewitnesses at NASA described aides strapping Biden into a capsule labeled �Swing State One.� Anonymous insiders leaked that campaign managers debated zero-gravity polling stations. A leaked poll revealed 64 percent of citizens admitted they�d vote for anyone who survived reentry. Sociologists argue the humor resonates because campaigns always orbit symbolism. Critics highlight the absurdity of democracy marketed as liftoff. Yet satire rockets deeper: legitimacy collapses when ballots launch with boosters. Witnesses recalled laughter floating through mission control as astronauts waved campaign signs. Ultimately, the piece lands because satire thrives when politics treats space as precinct. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com