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3/9/17

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How often do you watch porn? And would you consider that a healthy amount or are you compulsive about it?
Watching porn has become the norm for many who use it to spice things up in the bedroom or while away lonely nights.
But new research suggests that not all porn viewers are the same and, instead, can be split into three groups.
What’s concerning, though, is that only one of those groups is considered healthy.
A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed there are recreational, compulsive and distressed porn viewers.
Recreational viewers account for 75 percent of all participants in the study, watching an average of 24 minutes of porn a week.
This group consisted of mainly women and people in relationships.
It was closely followed by the distressed group, who watched porn for the least amount of time – about 17 minutes per week.
As the name suggests, the distressed group associate their emotional distress with watching X-rated material.
Then there is the compulsive group.
This group may have made up just 11.8 percent of the participants, but watched a staggering 110 minutes of porn per week.
Researchers discovered that men were more likely to fall into this category.
The experts from Université Laval in Quebec who conducted the study said only those who were recreational viewers were healthy porn watchers.
To conduct the study, the researchers asked 830 people to report how often they watched porn, then measured it against how compulsive their porn habits were and their level of distress while viewing porn.
Recreational users reported higher sexual satisfaction and lower sexual compulsiveness, avoidance and dysfunction.
Compulsive users experienced lower sexual satisfaction and dysfunction and higher sexual compulsiveness and avoidance.
Those who were highly distressed but watched porn less were sexually less satisfied and reported less sexual activity and more sexual dysfunction and avoidance.
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The experts concluded that the study “confirms the existence of recreational and compulsive profiles but also demonstrates the existence of an important subgroup of not particularly active, yet highly distressed consumers.”
But while the majority who watch porn appear to be able to do so in a healthy manner, it can be a problem for some.
It is still not classified as a true addiction, but some researchers believe a person can become addicted to watching porn in the same way they can become addicted to drugs and alcohol.
Others argue that there is not enough evidence to support it being treated as an addiction.

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Keith Rose holds a Master of Divinity degree and BA in Sacred Music. Keith worked with the Covenant Eyes Member Care Team for 15 years. He has also served as a Bible teacher, pastoral assistant, and music director at his local church. He's now the editor of the Covenant Eyes blog and the author of Allied: Fighting Porn With Accountability, Faith, and Friends . He lives in Hendersonville, North Carolina with his wife Ruby and daughter Winslow.
If you, a friend, spouse, or loved one is trying overcome porn, you’ve probably wondered how long it takes to recover from porn addiction. Is there a normal, predictable amount of time that needs to pass before they can say, “It’s behind me, I have quit”?
If you Google this, you’ll find some people say two weeks; others say 30 days. Recovery programs suggest 60 days or 90 days as an expected timeline for recovery.
So how long is it going to take to be absolutely positively free from porn? Here are some helpful guidelines based on expert research that will help you better understand the porn recovery process and accurately assess how much time recovery will take in different situations.
I was recently having lunch with some friends, and somebody asked me, “Given the huge problem of pornography, do you get discouraged with what you’re doing? Doesn’t the darkness seem overwhelming?”
The darkness of porn addiction can feel overwhelming. But I don’t get discouraged because I get the joy of hearing stories of victory every day. A Covenant Eyes member named David wrote to us:
“I would like to say thank you for Covenant Eyes. Since I put Covenant Eyes on my computer and phone and my tablets back in February 2020, I have not seen any porn. I have been struggling with porn for almost 40 years since the age of 16.”
So before we dive into the “how long” question, I want to affirm that you absolutely can recover from porn addiction. It doesn’t matter how long someone has been stuck, how deeply ingrained their habit is, or how out of control their life feels. Like David, you can break free.
There are two different ways of answering the question, “how long does it take to recover from porn addiction?” First, quitting porn takes a second. But also, porn recovery takes a lifetime. Both perspectives are equally true and equally important.
“Quitting is easy; I’ve done it hundreds of times.” So goes the old joke. It might be painful more than funny for anyone trapped by an addiction like porn. But there’s a nugget of truth in it: quitting porn does only take a second.
Someone can quit porn as quickly as they can close the browser. Every time someone chooses not to look at porn, they’ve quit porn. It’s as simple as that. Quitting porn isn’t something that takes years, months, or even days—it’s a decision in a moment.
It may be obvious, but it’s nonetheless important to remember. Alcoholics Anonymous gives advice very pertinent for people recovering from porn:
“In most cases, we cannot anticipate every possible turn of events, and no matter how diligently we are prepared, we are eventually caught off guard. Meanwhile, we’ve expended so much time and energy trying to predict future events, soothe future hurts, and even prevent future consequences that we have missed out on today’s opportunities. And the magnitude of the task we have set for ourselves has left us drained, overwhelmed, and distraught.”
Don’t worry about never looking at porn again. Just quit for now.
If you’ve wondered how long it takes, your question is not about quitting as much as it’s about recovery. How much time does it take someone to fully recover from porn addiction? From this perspective, quitting takes a lifetime.
Sex addiction therapist Marnie Ferree says:
“Ultimately, recovery is about practicing a new way of living, not simply about avoiding the practice of an addiction. Recovery is a commitment to a different life, forever and ever. To stop recovery because you’ve been doing it a long time is like deciding to stop breathing—ludicrous. (And life-threatening.) Walking in recovery is a ‘forever’ journey.”¹
Understanding the journey is vital. Therapists Larry and Wendy Maltz agree, “…every former porn user will find him or herself having to make frequent choices to reaffirm the commitment to stay away from porn.” However, they contend that it’s worth the effort, “It’s a lifelong process, but the feeling of accomplishment you can get from being able to keep porn out of your life can be an amazingly powerful experience.”²
These two short answers are important to keep in mind, but we can get more precise than this.
Here are some more helpful questions you can ask to help answer, “How long will it take to recover from porn?”
Ask ten different former porn users how long it took them to recover and you’ll likely get ten different answers. This is because the circumstances that shape someone’s porn habit can impact their recovery time.
If you understand the underlying circumstances of someone’s porn usage, you’ll have a better idea of how long it will take them to break free. Here are some of the common factors driving porn addiction.
What does this mean for recovery time? The earlier the exposure, the longer you can expect before the urges to look at porn go away.
Don’t be discouraged if you’re dealing with a porn addiction that was formed in childhood. While it creates challenges, it can be overcome! We recently heard from one of our members who signed for Covenant Eyes to get control of his addiction, “I’m 68 years old, and for the first time in 58 years, I’ve been porn-free for 35 days, praise God!”
When porn use is connected to trauma, it can make recovery much more challenging. Recovery means doing the hard work of honestly examining the painful circumstances of the past and how porn is being used to soothe old wounds or fulfill unmet needs.
For the fastest possible recovery, you need a realistic plan for dealing with symptoms. If you or someone you know is currently suffering from porn withdrawal symptoms, don’t worry! They don’t have to derail the recovery process. Learn more about 10 Symptoms of Porn Addiction Withdrawal (And How to Manage Them).
We’ve seen the circumstances that often drive porn addiction and are contributing factors to the severity of a person’s porn use. In addition to understanding the circumstances, it’s helpful to determine the level of involvement with porn.
Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Dr. Kevin Skinner helpfully describes seven levels you can use for evaluation. In his book, Treating Pornography Addiction, Dr. Skinner explains, “I believe it is much easier to view pornography involvement and addiction on a continuum rather than proclaiming a person addicted or not addicted.”²
Here’s a summary of the seven levels:
Try to understand how serious their involvement is before setting expectations for recovery.
As a general rule, the higher someone is on the scale, the longer it takes to completely break free. An individual at level two or three will likely recover much more quickly than someone at five or six.
On the other hand, people at the lower levels are less likely to be serious about their recovery. Former porn addict Nate Larkin says, “I’m told that four out of five guys who seek help for a sexually compulsive behavior only do so after receiving an ultimatum from a wife or a girlfriend. I’m one of the four.”
The length of time for recovery will vary depending on the circumstances and severity of the addiction, but it also depends on the intensity of their commitment to recovery and what sacrifices they’re willing to make.
Sex addiction therapist Jim Cress has said, “Things that were formed in intensity in my life will be changed through intensity in my recovery.” In other words, how quickly you can break free from porn will depend on the lengths you’re willing to go.
Dr. Doug Weiss says , “You have to be willing to do things you haven’t done before. Seriously, if you keep trying to quit porn the same way, you’re likely to fail again. To stop watching porn for good, you have to give up what you’ve been doing and do what you have to do.”
Addictions thrive in isolation. Some medical experts have called addiction “a disease of isolation.” 4 Porn, in particular, thrives on feelings of loneliness and shame. Because all people need secure relationships , someone without these relationships is especially vulnerable to a relationship with porn.
One of the most important factors in a person’s recovery is the allies they have to support them. Nobody overcomes porn without understanding friends and loved ones to encourage them on the journey.
Speaking to allies, sex addiction therapist Dr. Peter Kleponis says , “You need to be totally committed to your friend by being a constant source of support and accountability.” Without people who love unconditionally and support them, recovery is just too difficult to continue.
As we’ve seen, there are all different levels of porn addiction. All these variables make absolute predictions about recovery time impossible. However, there is research that can help us see how long it takes someone to break free from a serious porn addiction when they’re committed to the process.
Sex addiction expert Patrick Carnes conducted a study that covered five years of addiction recovery. Carnes suggests a timeline for six stages of recovery. 5
Dr. Carnes found that most slip-ups occur six to twelve months into recovery, but those who persisted experienced increasing success after this.
Wherever your friend or loved one is in recovery, it’s important to celebrate each victory. Too many people feel daunted by the long-term aspects of recovery and fail to appreciate how much progress is happening.
Every moment someone chooses to quit porn is worth celebrating. That’s why in 2021, Covenant Eyes started Victory Week —to highlight the small successes in the bigger journey towards freedom. Here are some important milestones you should honor:
These are just the beginning, but you get the idea. Recovery from porn can be a long journey, but it’s an exciting one!
¹ Marnie Ferree, No Stones (Downers Grove: IVP Books, 2010), 252-253.
² Wendy and Larry Maltz, The Porn Trap (Harper: New York, 2010), 258.
³ Kevin Skinner, Treating Pornography Addiction (GrowthClimate, Inc: Provo, 2017), 24-30.
4 Martha Bebinger, “Addiction Is ‘A Disease Of Isolation’ — So Pandemic Puts Recovery At Risk,” Kaiser Health News, March 20, 2020. https://khn.org/news/addiction-is-a-disease-of-isolation-so-pandemic-puts-recovery-at-risk/
5 Patrick J. Carnes, “Sexual addiction and compulsion: recognition, treatment, and recovery,” CNS Spectrums 5 (2000):63-72. doi: 10.1017/s1092852900007689. PMID: 17632453.
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