Best Bi Curious Dating Apps
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Best Bi Curious Dating Apps
There are no great bisexual-focused dating apps (yet), but these are your best options.
By
Leah Stodart on April 29, 2022
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Millennials will dig OkCupid's focus on social justice issues and its lack of creeps who over-sexualize bi people.
OKC has been perfecting compatibility since 2004, now with a framework that values inclusivity and political awareness.
Free yourself from creepy men and threesome seekers on HER, a queer-only app full of women who are actually women.
HER is a rapidly-growing space for queer women to make real connections while avoiding unicorn hunters.
Hinge's millennial LGBTQ user base continues to flourish and the personality-heavy profiles are refreshing.
Hinge lets you write your gender identity and the focus on personality deters ignorant horny people.
Skip the wine and dine and get right to the 69 on this inclusive hookup app for singles *and* couples.
Singles and couples make up Feeld's ethically non-monogamous community, where 45% of users identify as non-hetero.
It's still a lawless land, but the huge LGBTQ user base and steps toward inclusivity make it a viable option.
The OG swiping app has a huge queer population and is a great low-pressure option (if you can get past the straights).
Putting "bi" in your profile might get you some nasty messages, but Grindr is *the* place to meet experienced men.
Men having trouble connecting with other men on Tinder are basically guaranteed sex in this atmosphere.
For the user base of Tinder with less of a hookups-only vibe, Bumble is your app.
While it's not wildly different from Tinder, a time limit on your chats helps get the conversation going so you can get dating.
Best For Threesomes (sans Unicorn Hunting)
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The bisexual community has an inside joke that describes what it's like to date as a bi person: People think it means double the options or double the fun, but it really just means double the rejection.
Self-deprecating jokes like this one are at the core of the Single People Club regardless of sexuality, but bisexual people do face extra roadblocks in the dating world.
True: Online dating sucks for everyone. Horny jerks disguise themselves as relationship seekers, your DMs are constantly filled with bad pickup lines and overly persistent creeps, and many times, the site's algorithm ignores the filters that you've set. But the fact that there are no dating sites that cater specifically to bi people means that they're frequently swiping on people who don't take bisexuality seriously.
The "B" in LGBTQ+ makes up 50 percent of the queer community , but it's one of the least-acknowledged letters in the acronym. There are dating sites for lesbians and dating sites for gay men , but nothing specifically for those who identify as bisexual. What makes the bi dating landscape — especially the online one — so tricky to maneuver?
One of the most antiquated stereotypes about bisexual people is that they're always down to fuck and down for polyamory. "Unicorn" is a term used to describe a bisexual person (usually a woman) who sleeps with heterosexual couples. In online dating, unicorn hunting is when a straight, taken female user toggles that she's "looking for women" — not genuinely looking for a girl to get to know romantically, but rather for a girl interested in a threesome with her and her boyfriend or husband or whoever. Of course, they don't mention this until later.
No one is saying that threesomes are bad. Reddit users who have experienced this mention that they don't have a problem with "ethical non-monogamy." They have a problem with being tricked into it. (There aren't any great apps for polyamory either, but this is why Feeld (opens in a new tab) exists.)
Another frequent bisexual experience is one that all women face online, now heightened by the mere mention of "bi" in a dating app bio: men being creepy. Too many straight men have yet to grasp the concept that bisexuality is not a green light to ask a stranger how many girls they've been with or if she likes men or women better.
23-year-old Megan from Virginia, who is a friend of a friend, told us via Facebook that she couldn't even count the number of gross (slash ignorant) messages she'd received from men in reference to writing "bi" in her Tinder bio. "There were times when they would be like 'Oh, you never seemed gay in high school' or whatever, because gay is obviously a personality trait 🙃," she said. "Like my sexuality wasn’t a real thing or it was just a fetish to these people."
Catfishing is also an issue. Some men have such a rabid obsession with queer women that they'll sign up for a dating site as a woman just to see an all-women swiping field. It's a total privacy breach at the least, and certainly doesn't boost your willingness to meet up with someone in real life. Many dating sites are working to increase transparency about first name and age by requiring Facebook verification during sign-up.
Does " gold star lesbian " ring a bell? The delineation is given to lesbians who have never slept with a man. Countless bisexual women have reported being ghosted after disclosing that they have been with a guy before, and profiles with "gold stars only" in the bio have popped up, too.
This crowd of Reddit users explain the ways they've experienced biphobia on gay or lesbian dating sites. They've been told that they're not "actually bisexual" if they haven't been with anyone of the same gender before or that they're "basically straight" if their most recent relationship was a heterosexual one. Summed up: if you're not monosexually gay, it's a cop-out. Invalidating someone's sexual experiences is the opposite of the supportive sex-positivity that you'd expect from inside the queer community, and it contributes to many bisexual folks' struggles of not feeling queer enough .
Adding those two simple letters to your bio will draw some unwanted attention, and it's going to be a pain in the ass. But in the long run, it'll also act like an asshole filter to weed out people who try to put sexual orientation into a box.
The idea that being bisexual is just a pit stop to being "fully-blown gay" — or that it means that you're attracted to everyone you see — probably aren't thoughts you'd prefer a partner to have. They're especially not opinions you'd like to hear about months down the road from someone you thought you knew well. The easiest way to ensure that you won't be left heartbroken over someone not accepting your sexuality? Let them know from the jump.
One writer for Tinder's blog mentions that, despite his number of matches dropping once he put "bi" in his profile, he found more meaningful connections with open-minded men and women and had a more positive experience in general:
"For the first time in my life, women wanted to date me for something that others ostracized. I felt empowered and optimistic about my romantic future.
I also found myself meeting more bi men. Men who didn’t explicitly write “bi” on their profile, but would happily say something the moment they saw I proudly displayed my sexuality. Except for my current boyfriend, who identifies as gay, every person I’ve dated seriously has identified as bisexual or queer. I don’t think that’s coincidental. When you have shared experiences with discrimination, it’s easier to date."
"Coming out" over and over again is unfair. But doing so right off the bat also acts as an early screening for people who identify as bi but say they wouldn't date another bi person — something that a lot of bi men experience from bi women.
Do bisexual people get dealt a shitty hand on dating apps? Yes. Does that mean meeting someone special online is impossible? Hell no. A 2017 study cited in the MIT Technology Review found that people who meet online are more likely to be compatible and have a higher chance of a healthy marriage if they decide to get hitched. Further, a 2019 study done at Stanford found that nearly two-thirds of modern same-sex couples meet online.
It sucks that there's no legit dating app specifically devoted to bi individuals and other singles who respect what it means to be bi — yet. However, this also means that a good portion of other single bi folks are probably on those popular dating apps that you've considered. At least you know the user base is there. Many of these apps have taken steps toward inclusive features that can narrow your dating pool: OkCupid (opens in a new tab) pulls out the left-leaning people with compatibility based on questions about social issues and politics, and Tinder's addition of 37 custom sexual orientations lets you opt to be shown matches that identify the same way you do.
Knowing all that, here are the best dating apps for bisexual people:
Almost everyone on the app is going to be on the same page politically and socially
Modern app design is actually fun to use
User base might not be big in smaller towns
For young, liberal voters, politics aren't just a "well if we agree, it's great" thing when looking for a partner — it's the make or break for a solid foundation. OkCupid's 2017 redesign is more than just millennial aesthetics: It's geared toward ensuring that you don't end up on a date with someone who doesn't pay attention. The addition of 12 gender identities and 20 sexual orientations also makes it a safer space for non-binary and queer individuals to find love while using the pronouns that fit them.
The way that OkCupid targets more open-minded, sex-positive users seems to be translating to the experience that bi people have on the site. Megan from VA noticed that, compared to Tinder and Hinge, she received the least amount of gross messages from guys about her sexual experiences. Though she found her current partner on Tinder, she liked OkCupid the most:
"I like that the profiles were longer and I could see how they answered some questions that could be important to me before I even messaged them. That meant that if I didn’t agree with someone on a make or break issue to me, I could just not message them before putting the time into talking to them and learning that later."
Politics aren't the only compatibility factor here. OKCupid has in-depth user bios, but profile building isn't long or tedious at all. You'll even get to see the percentage of how much you have in common with other daters based on the questions you both answer. It's an algorithm that OKC has been perfecting since their launch and we love them for that.
Privacy policy: OkCupid is part of Match Group, so its privacy policy is very similar to Match's. The company shares some of your information with third-party partners, though its policy says they follow a strict vetting process before working with any parter. Read the full privacy policy here .
Something for every type of queer woman
Might run into fake profiles or couples looking for a third
Between creepy men pretending to be women and straight girls looking for another girl to have a threesome with her and her boyfriend, most heteronormative dating sites don't give bi women a great shot at finding a relationship. HER, an award-winning app made for queer women by queer women, is the perfect place to go if you're tired of the only queer woman you know being your ex girlfriend.
The app that wants to "introduce you to every lesbian you've ever wanted to meet" is growing rapidly: HER has grown to 4.5 million users since its rebrand in 2015, and according to Statista , that's pretty damn close to what Bumble is working with — and they're ALL. WOMEN. If you tried HER a few years ago and were discouraged by swiping through the same people, your experience will be much different this time around.
In summer 2019, HER revamped its minimalistic profiles to let users get more creative in categories like gender, sexuality, pronouns, diet preferences, and star signs, as well as a "What does this mean?" field in the sex, gender, and pronoun categories to create more well-rounded understanding of identity. There's also a space for a text bio where you can showcase your sense of humor and describe what type of relationship you're looking for.
The app has groups like "newly out," "in a relationship/finding friends," and "travelers" to help you find your people. Plus, during the pandemic, HER has hosted online and virtual events.
Privacy policy: HER collects personal information that can identify you and anonymous information that is not tied to you. The company uses cookies for marketing purposes like emails to see if users are actually opening promotional emails. HER also uses third parties for advertising. There is not a clear way to opt out of cookies on its website unless you are a California resident. Read the full privacy policy here .
More genuine connections than Tinder without the pressure of a serious dating site
Prompts provide conversation starters, so you aren't flooded with "hey" messages
Can't send photos, which sucks for sharing memes, but rocks for not getting unsolicited explicit pics
You're limited to 8 matches per day
Young people looking to at least go on a few dates with the same person instead of everything turning into a friends with benefits situation was a major blind spot for dating sites — until Hinge blew up. The premise and user base might be in the Tinder and Bumble realm, but Hinge's unique profile criteria and algorithm based on that criteria set the scene for matches with real-life potential . Some 90 percent said the first date was great and 72 percent said they'd be down for a second date.
Despite the fact that we're actively seeking out new dating apps and feel a rush every time a cute contender swipes right back, no one looking for something serious wants to be on these. That's the whole idea behind Hinge's 2019 rebrand to "the dating app designed to be deleted." Instead of cheesy questionnaires and spam emails about the 50 winks you were sent, Hinge uses ice breakers, religion, education, and more to help you find matches you'll actually get along with. Though there's a mix of serious and casual users, Hinge's latest updates allows you to select your "Dating Intentions," so you can be clear about exactly what you're looking for, sans The Talk.
Instead of swiping, connections are made by liking or commenting on another person's prompt answers or photos. Prompts range from "Two truths and a lie" to "I'll pick the topic, you start the conversation." You can send eight likes per day with the free version of Hinge, but there isn't a limit to how many people can like you per day. Conversations are hidden after 14 days of inactivity to keep you focused on potential boos who are taking meeting seriously. Paying for Hinge Preferred also lets you filter by political views and other factors.
The focus on personality and interests is a nice change of pace from Tinder, where most of the focus is on selfies and whether you're DTF on the first date. Thoughtful responses are probably too much effort for most people who could simply use Tinder to scout threesome contenders or send nasty messages. Olivia from Texas told us why she prefers Hinge over other apps:
"I feel like because they place such a heavy emphasis on your personality with all the question prompts it helps it feel more romantic, which is more palatable to people who were raised to believe that the only way to meet people is some kind of meet-cute or something."
She also mentioned that she finds way more real bi girls than unicorn hunters on Hinge. The number of Hinge downloads (including a surge in the number of gay profiles) tripled the summer after Pete Buttigieg revealed that he met his husband on Hinge.
Privacy policy: Hinge collects cookies for the website/app's functionality as well for third-party providers that work with the company. You have the option to opt-out of nonessential cookies. Read the full privacy policy here .
Users are open-minded and upfront about what they want
Specifically designed for threesomes (or more-somes) so you don't have to troll Tinder looking for a third
You'll probably run into some bots or sex workers trying to promote themselves on the app
Have to pay for features that allow for more anonymity
Bisexual people certainly aren't against using a dating app to get laid — they'd just prefer that it's not through the assumptions of a straight person. Created by a non-hetero and non-monogamous couple, Feeld is a dating app for couples and singles to find threesomes, foursomes, or however many people you want. (This isn't the first dating site to focus on non-monogamous sex, but it is the first to do it in a way that doesn't look like a scammy billboard ad.) Because more-than-two sex is the entire point of the app, most people are honest about what they're looking for — AKA no need to lie about unicorn hunting.
Sex positivity is the name of the game here, and not like the vulgar, dicks-everywhere kind that you'd see on AdultFriendFinder. Here, you can get specific about boundaries, find people with the same kinks, and say you're least interested in "cis het men" in your bio without people questioning you . And while "sit on my face" is the sexiest opening line that horny Tinder can think of, people on Feeld are generally chill, respectful, and can talk about sex without frothing at the mouth.
LGBTQ folks appreciate Feeld because it appreciates them. The app offers more than 20 sexual and gender identities and there's a comforting understanding between users about what those identities mean. According to the company's own stats, 35 percent of users are on the app with a partner and 45 percent identify as something other than heterosexual. The New York Times describes it as "a dating app with options that put the Kinsey scale to shame."
Privacy policy: Data like purchases, usage data, identifiers, and diagnostics may be used by third-party apps and websites. They also collect cookies on their website to recognize your device and your past preferences, though there are some nonessential cookies you can opt out of. Read the full privacy policy here .
Huge user base, even in small towns
You can find pretty much any type of relationship whether you want a hookup or something long-term
Tons of App Store
Bear Twink Hunk Chart
Bar Whores
Air Cumshot