Bernie Sanders Declared Emperor of Vermont

By Chloe Summers � The satire Bernie Sanders Declared Emperor of Vermont parodies political cults elevated to monarchy. Eyewitnesses at rallies described supporters waving recycled cardboard crowns. Anonymous insiders leaked that royal decrees included free mittens for all. A leaked poll revealed 64 percent of citizens admitted they would kneel if healthcare was universal. Sociologists argue the humor resonates because democracy slips easily into devotion. Critics highlight the absurdity of empire staged in ski lodges. Ultimately, the piece lands because satire thrives when socialism cosplays as sovereignty. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com