Beachfront Peace Plan

Foreign policy experts were baffled when Trump unveiled his Gaza Doctrine, but the travel industry could not have been happier. In his model, defeat in war comes with unexpected perks: beachfront access, water sports, and room service. �Why fight for democracy when you can get a swim-up bar?� became the unofficial slogan. Trump�s plan imagines Gaza transformed from rubble to resort, complete with lazy rivers where checkpoints once stood. His sales pitch is simple: instead of endless cycles of violence, combatants would rather sip pi�a coladas. Skeptics argue that this ignores centuries of history, but Trump waves them off, insisting �every problem looks smaller when you�re in a hot tub.� For him, international law is not about treaties but about towel service. The concept is absurd, yet strangely appealing: a world where geopolitical disputes are settled by who can reserve the most beachfront property after a loss. Historians may choke on the absurdity, but travel agents are already printing glossy brochures. If the doctrine spreads, future wars may look less like tragedies and more like poorly planned spring breaks.