Be Reasonable in the Family (Col. 3:18-20)

🎬 VIDEO

Colossians 3:18-20

You wives, be in subjection to your husbands, as it is becoming in the Lord. You husbands, keep on loving your wives and do not be bitterly angry with them. You children, be obedient to your parents in everything, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord.

Our text comments today highlight this point about a husband. Notice it says: “Although he cannot always do “as she [that is, his wife] asks, “he often arrives at a more balanced decision by consulting her.” Well, those of us who are husbands know the truthfulness of those words, don’t we? Now, there are a number of qualities that this statement may bring to mind. And one of those qualities is the quality of reasonableness. That’s a quality that all of us need to display. How would you describe a reasonable person? What examples of reasonableness do we find in Jehovah and Jesus? And what can we learn from their example? Well, let’s first consider that description. Our publications have stated that a reasonable person is patient, gentle, and kind in his dealings with himself and with others. He takes into consideration others’ limitations and their circumstances. Someone with a reputation of being reasonable is flexible when circumstances warrant it. It’s like that husband that we just mentioned. When he is reasonable as he consults with his wife, he’s willing to listen to her and, when appropriate, to go along with her wishes. Now notice with me at Philippians 4:5 the inspired counsel about this quality of reasonableness. Please turn there in Philippians chapter 4, and notice what the Bible tells us in the <i>A </i>portion of verse 5. It states: “Let your reasonableness become known to all men.” So others should see us displaying this quality. Another translation renders the verse: “Have a reputation for being reasonable.” So notice, it’s not so much how we view ourselves, whether we feel we’re reasonable, rather, it’s how others see us —how we are known, if we have the reputation of being reasonable. When you think about it, reasonableness attracts, doesn’t it, whereas unreasonableness tends to drive away? Well, now that we have that description, what examples of reasonableness do we find in Jehovah and Jesus? Let’s consider Jehovah’s example first. And if you turn with me to Leviticus chapter 5, let’s look at an example of his reasonableness with the nation of Israel. Leviticus chapter 5, and notice there in verse 5 to begin. It says: “If he becomes guilty as respects one of these things “[talking about someone who’s committed a sin, it says], then he must confess in what he has sinned.” Verse 6: “He will also bring his guilt offering “to Jehovah for the sin that he committed, “namely, a female from the flock, either a female lamb or a young female goat, for a sin offering.” So that was plain. But notice Jehovah’s reasonableness in verse 7: “If, though, he cannot afford a sheep, “he must bring to Jehovah two turtledoves or two young pigeons as his guilt offering for the sin.” So that was reasonable on Jehovah’s part. But Jehovah took it a step further. Notice verse 11: “Now if he cannot afford two turtledoves or two young pigeons, “he must bring as his offering for his sin a tenth of an ephah of fine flour for a sin offering.” So notice, Jehovah was reasonable in what he expected, depending on the Israelites’ financial circumstances. As we read verse 11, you may have wondered, ‘Well, what’s a tenth of an ephah?’ Well, our footnote helps us. You notice what it says? “A tenth of an ephah equaled 2.2 L (2 dry qt).” Notice this image of an Israelite woman. She’s of very limited means, and she’s holding out —possibly to give to the priest— her sin offering of two quarts of flour. It wasn’t much, was it? Here in Leviticus, it was as if Jehovah was saying: ‘If you don’t have enough for a lamb or a goat, that’s OK. ‘If you don’t have enough for those two small birds, don’t worry. Just bring me two quarts of flour as your sacrifice.’ Well, imagine how happy a poor Israelite like this woman would have been that Jehovah valued her small offering just as much as one of the costlier sacrifices presented by her wealthier neighbors! But did you notice an important detail there in verse 11 about the flour? The flour that the needy Israelite was to offer wasn’t just any type of flour. Did you see there in the verse? It was to be fine flour, such as that used to prepare a meal for an honored guest. So though the poor Israelite couldn’t give as much as others, the little they offered to Jehovah was to be their best. In effect, Jehovah was saying, ‘I realize you can’t offer as much as others, but I know, I know, that you’re going to give me your best.’ What’s the lesson? Jehovah displays reasonableness by taking into consideration our limitations and our circumstances. You know, some brothers and sisters can offer in their service the equivalent of a lamb or a goat. Others can offer the equivalent of two turtledoves or two pigeons. And perhaps in the past, some of us were able to offer the same in our assignments. But right now, because of our circumstances, because of limitations, maybe we’re not able to. Well, what do we know about Jehovah? He graciously and reasonably accepts our best in his service even if that’s comparable to two quarts of fine flour. What a reasonable God we worship and a good lesson for us to be reasonable and not compare ourselves with others or to expect more than we should of our brothers and sisters! Now, what about Jesus’ example? He set an example in reasonableness by being patient and kind in his dealings with his disciples despite their shortcomings. Let’s notice an example. Turn with me to Luke chapter 22, and let’s notice an example of Jesus’ reasonableness. Luke chapter 22 —the setting is shortly before Jesus’ death, and he’s aware that Peter is soon going to deny him three times. So, what did Jesus do? He encouraged Peter. Notice verse 32. Jesus said: “But I have made supplication “for you that your faith may not give out; and you, once you have returned, strengthen your brothers.” Notice the encouragement? Jesus said: “I have made supplication for you.” In other words, Jesus prayed in Peter’s behalf that Peter’s faith not give out. And then he told him: “Once you have returned, strengthen your brothers.” Jesus expressed confidence that Peter, after a short lapse, would return to faithful service and he would strengthen his brothers —and that despite the fact, you notice in verse 34, Jesus told him, ‘You’re going to deny me three times.’ Now, how does this account show reasonableness on Jesus’ part? Well, you may remember what Jesus had said sometime earlier, as recorded at Matthew 10:33. He said: “Whoever disowns me before men, I will also disown him.” Now, that was a strong statement, and Jesus could have applied that to Peter. But demonstrating reasonableness, Jesus didn’t reject Peter. Why? Because Jesus knew that there were going to be extenuating circumstances. He was willing to forgive his repentant apostle and express confidence in what Peter would do in the future. So the lesson? We should look for the good in our brothers. Brother Splane highlighted that on Saturday for us, didn’t he? Despite their imperfections, we should express confidence and faith in our brothers. We should be reasonable in what we expect of others. Who knows? They may be facing challenges that we either don’t know about or that we don’t fully understand. One <i>Watchtower </i>stated this: “How much better it is to commend our brothers for what they do than to judge them for what they do not do!” Like Jesus, let’s be reasonable when love calls for it and circumstances warrant it. Well, what have we considered? A reasonable person is patient, kind, and gentle in his dealings with himself and with others. He takes into consideration the limitations and the circumstances of others. Reasonableness attracts, unreasonableness tends to drive away. What excellent examples we have in reasonableness with Jehovah and Jesus! Remember the fine flour and the need to look for the good in others, expressing confidence in them. So as we go about our day, may we look for opportunities to let our reasonableness become known to all men.