Bdsm Means

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Bdsm Means
Medically Reviewed by Dan Brennan, MD on June 28, 2021
BDSM is a term used to describe aspects of sex that involve dominance, submission, and control. The practice typically involves one partner taking on a more dominant role during sex, while the other is more submissive. The acronym BDSM can be divided into these categories: 
While these are the broader categories, there is no one way to practice BDSM — different types can include power play, role-playing, pain play, bondage, wax play, edging, sensory deprivation, or humiliation. 
According to a 2016 study, nearly 47% of women and 60% of men have fantasized about dominating someone in a sexual context. The same study found that BDSM sex was slightly more prevalent in couples on the LGBTQ spectrum, but researchers otherwise determined that BDSM sex was practiced across different ages, genders, and ethnic backgrounds. 
Practicing BDSM sex in a relationship can be enjoyable for both people. Many people who engage in BDSM see it as a form of release, an exploration of trust, or a space to act out fantasies of submission, vulnerability, and control.
One small study found that participating in a BDSM dynamic may reduce stress and improve mood. Other research found that participating in healthy BDSM scenes fostered feelings of intimacy between partners. 
In a relationship with two partners, one will typically play the dominant role, while the other will play the submissive role. A “switch” is an individual who shifts between the dominant and submissive roles, depending on the partner and the context. This dominant and submissive dynamic is often referred to as a top/bottom dynamic. While the dominant partner or top is typically the one taking control in spanking, bonding, whipping, or other sexual scenarios, the submissive may also maintain control by demanding the top perform certain roles or insist on switching roles. 
The most important part of BDSM sex is the act of consent. Partners should always make sure everyone gives enthusiastic consent and outlines clear boundaries. These boundaries can be laid out in a formal contract, a verbal agreement, or a more casual conversation about desires and limits. 
Due to the intense nature of some BDSM scenes, it is also important to introduce a safe word. If one partner becomes uncomfortable with any part of the experience, they can speak the word to stop the current act — or stop the sex altogether. 
Another way to negotiate boundaries is through the traffic light system. Each color communicates how a partner is feeling and what they want. Red means they want the partner to stop what they’re doing immediately. Yellow means they want their partner to slow down, either due to physical discomfort or reaching a limit. Green means they like what the partner is doing, they feel comfortable, and they want the act to continue.
Before you engage in more intense forms of erotic play—like the use of whips, advanced bondage techniques, or sex toys—it’s a good idea to educate yourself on these practices first, through classes, books, or instructional online content.
Finally, partners participating in BDSM sex can practice what is known as aftercare. This is when partners take care of one another after a scene, including cuddling, hydrating, bathing together, or another calming activity. It can also include a discussion about what worked, what didn't, and how each partner is feeling. This post-sex debriefing can help protect all participants physically, mentally, and emotionally. 
If you’re interested in trying BDSM sex, there are some “light” BDSM practices that may be a good starting point for beginners. These can include: 
Most importantly, communicate with your partner about your desires. BDSM includes a wide range of sexual activities and dynamics, and each person will approach BDSM sex differently. Be honest with your partner about what you’re looking for and what you’re comfortable with. 
The Journal of Sex Research: "The Prevalence of Paraphilic Interests and Behaviors in the General Population: A Provincial Survey"
Northern Illinois University: "Sadomasochism without Sex? Exploring the Parallels between BDSM and Extreme Rituals
Psychology of Consciousness: "Consensual BDSM Facilitates Role-Specific Altered States of Consciousness: A Preliminary Study."
UCSB Campus Advocacy Resources & Education Center: “Communicating Consent.”
© 2005 - 2022 WebMD LLC. All rights reserved.
WebMD does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

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If you’re having enough sex, it’s only a matter of time until it grows stale. Eventually, you’ll begin to crave something more than a quick release. You’ll want sex to last—and for physical pleasure to come coupled with psychological stimulation.
That’s where bondage can come into play (no pun intended). But before you can bust out the restraints and sounding needles, you need to know what’s out there. Only then, can you properly ask for whatever it is your secret, greasy, heart desires.
That’s why we spoke to Jess Wilde, a bondage specialist at the online sex retailer Lovehoney . She’s going to help us untangle the unnecessarily confusing lexicon of the bondage world.
An abbreviation for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, and Masochism, BDSM is an umbrella term for numerous sexual practices. It’s not only inclusive of the four principles in the title, it includes elements of roleplaying, dominance, submission, and other related interpersonal dynamics.
Breaking down B in BDSM a little bit further, “Bondage is the sexual practice of restraining someone during sex and falls under the umbrella term Power Play,” says Wilde. “Power Play is where one partner takes on a dominant role and one takes on a submissive role. Restraint includes anything from holding the sub’s hands in a certain position to using restraint tools like handcuffs.”
Dominance and submission is a set of erotic behaviors involving one person being subservient (or submissive) to the person in control ( the Dominant ). This can happen in the bedroom through the Dominant (Dom) dictating orders to the Submissive (Sub), but it doesn’t even require both parties to be in the same room. Some Doms never meet their Subs in real life. They simply converse over the phone or email, where the Dom tells the Sub what he or she would like them to do.
“Being a good Dominant involves much more than being able to control and give orders to others,” explains Wilde. “A good Dominant will also be able to practice self-control and respect their Submissive. Dominants should also be responsible enough to decrease the intensity of or stop a scene altogether when a safeword is spoken.”
“Submitting doesn't mean being weak,” Wilde continues. “It's a gift to give up all control, to make yourself more vulnerable than most people could ever imagine, and to offer yourself, body and soul, for someone else's pleasure... And, of course, doing so is also a Submissive's ultimate pleasure.”
A safeword, which Wilde noted while discussing Dominance and Submission is “a word, phrase, or signal which you both agree means ‘stop.’” She continues, “Make sure you agree on a safeword–this is a good starting point for all BDSM activity. A safeword should be easy to remember, easy to say, and should be a word you’d never usually use in sex. A personal favorite is 'Gandalf!'"
“In BDSM, master/slave, m/s or sexual slavery is a relationship in which one individual serves another in an authority-exchange structured relationship,” says Wilde. “Unlike dominant and submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in master/slave structures.”
“Animal play is a special type of role play where one or more participants take on the role of an animal. Animal play is commonly seen in BDSM contexts,” explains Wilde. “Typically the submissive ‘animal’ partner is humiliated or dominated, but sometimes they will take on the more dominant role. Animal play is sometimes called animal role play or pet play.”
“You may be familiar with sex contracts from Fifty Shades of Grey ,” says Wilde. “The contract wasn’t just a figment of author E. L. James’ imagination. In BDSM communities, these kinds of contracts help Dominants and Submissives play with each other safely, both emotionally and physically.”
“By establishing ground rules, each partner knows what’s expected of them. It also makes issues of consent—which is crucial when power exchange and pain are involved—crystal clear.”
“Electro-sex is sometimes called erotic electrostimulation (e-stim) or electroplay ,” says Wilde. “It gives people distinctive tingly, tickly sensations which differ greatly to the sensations achieved with common battery-powered sex toys like vibrators.”
“It taps into the electrical signals that course through the body’s human nervous system, stimulating them to create more powerful sensory reactions. A variety of high-tech sex toys are designed for electro-sex. These include electrified butt plugs, masturbatory sleeves, cock rings, eggs, G-spot probes, and nipple clamps.”
“Limits are basically a boundary, a thing you don’t want to do. BDSM often divides these into ‘soft’ and ‘hard’ limits. A soft limit is often an activity that you don’t enjoy and wouldn’t normally engage in, but you may consider doing it for the right person,” says Wilde.
“Hard limits are absolutes. These are the things that you will not do, under any circumstances. For many people, these may be activities or things which trigger bad memories, panic attacks, or other psychological stress. Hard limits can be anything at all, even things that other people consider to be tame or a lot of fun.”
“Sensation play describes a wide variety of activities that use the body's senses as a way to arouse and provide stimulation to a partner,” explains Wilde.
“Although sensation play is often related to skin sensations, it doesn't have to be so limited. Sight, taste, and hearing can also be included in sensation play. Forms of light sensations play include playing with feathers and other soft objects, light blindfolding, and bondage with scarves or temperature play with ice or hot wax.”
“The goal of sensation play is simply to provide unusual and arousing sensations to a partner's body. It is only limited by one's imagination and, of course, personal limits, which should be respected at all times.”
When the fun and games are over (and the last spank has struck), there’s one last thing you have to remember to do. As Wilde explains, aftercare is an essential part of your play-time and can bring both you and your partner closer together in post-coital bliss.
“Known as ‘sub-drop’, sometimes the submissive partner can feel a wash of sadness when playtime has finished and the endorphins wear off,” says Wilde. “Bondage aftercare is the process of reassuring your partner that you care for them. Lots of hugs, loving touches and an open chat about the experience you’ve just shared are great ways to do this.”

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All of our slang term and phrase definitions are made possible by our wonderful visitors. If you know of another definition of BDSM that should be included here, please let us know .
We went to a BDSM club and it was quite fun.
The BDSM community has become my second family.
There are no references for BDSM at this time. We would greatly appreciate your contribution if you would like to submit your own !
A slang abbreviation of Yugoslavia, the former Southeastern European country.
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