Awkward Teen Porn

Awkward Teen Porn
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Alyssa Funke Alyssa Funke (Facebook)
Beautiful and young, Alyssa Funke went to Las Vegas and “auditioned” for a porn movie via a website.
After the video went public, the former straight-A student's old classmates in Stillwater, Minnesota began sending her messages.
Some were surprised, some negative, and others supportive. She answered a few with tweets of her own like “Pornstar status,” and “FAMOUS for dayzzzzz.”
However, it all took a toll, and the young woman bought a shotgun and drove to her family’s boat.
KMSP-TV reports Funke's family confirmed she had a history of depression. Her father is in prison, and her mother has been charged with dealing drugs. They say Alyssa also had struggles with money.
Her family lay some of the blame for her death on Internet bullying. The Sheriff’s office says the message sent were not criminal harassment.
Alyssa’s family says they are talking about her death now because they would like to keep other girls from making the same mistake. They want young women to understand the pressure that comes from social media, and the stigma porn carries.
They also say they would like to bring attention to bullying, and the effect it can have on a life.
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Jul 8, 2014, 09:41 AM EDT | Updated Jul 8, 2014
A weekly exploration of women and power.
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For parents, sending a teen to summer camp must be a deal with the devil: You get a break from caring for your angsty kid, but in exchange, you live with the knowledge that little Madison might suck a dick this summer. Communal sleeping, shared showers, and minimal supervision — often at the hands of slightly older and even hornier youths — add up to a pressure cooker of hormones, humiliation, awkward fumbling, and memorable discoveries. To kick off the Cut’s Summer Sex Week, we collected ten people’s most vivid memories of summer-camp sex — and sex gone awry, and confused preteen discoveries, and other strangely nostalgic humiliations.
1. Fake Orgasms Sweep Horse Camp When I was 11, there was a fake-orgasm craze at Camp Rim Rock’s horseback riding camp for girls. It started when Lauren Petersen* asked if anyone else had “tickling feelings” while grinding on a Western saddle. Lauren was the alpha girl of my cabin. She was cool and tough and came from New York and had a Beastie Boys cassette. When she stole my pink training bra, I was kind of honored. If Lauren Petersen felt tickles on horses, then feeling tickles on horses was cool. Soon everyone was feeling tickles, or trying to feel them, or faking them. It was like the Salem Witch Trials. I will never say whether my horsegasms were fake.

Part of HuffPost Comedy. ©2022 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved.
Feb 11, 2014, 11:00 AM EST | Updated Dec 6, 2017
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Associate Editor, Viral Content, The Huffington Post
The word "awkward" is practically synonymous with the word "teenager" -- every adolescent undergoes a difficult physical and emotional transformation as he or she transitions from childhood to adulthood. Unfortunately, that awkward quotient screws some of us over more than others; all teen angst is not created equal.
If you were one of those particularly, and painfully, awkward teens, you may not realize how those years of acne, uncomfortable dates and general mortification helped shape you into the cool adult you are now. Here are all the reasons to be grateful for your awkward phase ... and to the awkward teenage-you for enduring it:
1. Your quirkiness, which once made you a social calamity, is now the source of your success.
The same qualities that made you feel like a freak during middle school could be what make you valuable in the real world. Alexandra Robbins, author of "The Geeks Shall Inherit The Earth," calls this phenomenon "The Quirk Theory." Your ability to think outside the box might not have been appreciated by your peers during adolescence, when conformity reigns supreme. But in the adult world, that creativity makes you a valuable employee. That's why revenge is best enjoyed at a twenty-year high school reunion.
There's nothing like a horrible high school experience to make you more sympathetic to human pain, and more sensitive to other peoples' mortification. You've been there.
3. Late-blooming helped you think more creativity. Albert Einstein said so.
Albert Einstein was a late-bloomer, and he believed his slow maturation was the reason he discovered general relativity. In Walter Isaacson's biography of the scientist, titled "Einstein: His Life and Universe," Einstein is quoted as saying, "The ordinary adult never bothers his head about the problems of space and time. But I developed so slowly that I began to wonder about space and time only when I was already grown up." The famously eccentric genius was a slow speaker, a rebel and a nuisance to his teachers -- but his slow, awkward growth ultimately equipped him with enough brainpower to unravel so many mysteries of time and space.
4. You learned to laugh at yourself.
Being a huge geek is humbling. You trip and fall a lot and get used to spilling things on your shirt. And, if you're lucky, you learn to laugh at your daily gaffes. Teen awkwardness is hellacious, but it's not eternal.
5. Your nonconformity now makes you seem more confident.
Your affinity for velcro shoes might have gotten you a lame-o reputation in junior high, but sporting unexpected kicks can actually command respect in the real world, according to a study by Harvard Business School professors. They coined the term "The Red Sneaker Effect" to explain why adults who actively refuse to conform to the crowd are seen as having "higher status" than the rest of the flock. They argue that people who flagrantly ignore certain dress code standards, e.g. people who wear red sneakers with their business suits, appear unconcerned about the "social cost" of dressing inappropriately, suggesting high levels of both confidence and influence. This could also be called "The Mark Zuckerberg Gray Hoodie Effect."
6. Your geekiness might have helped you avoid juvenile delinquency.
A 2009 publication from Sweden's Orebro University found that the same shyness that made you a high school wallflower also made you less likely to to engage in risky behavior, like alcohol use and "one-night stands."
7. You learned to let your freak flag fly.
The same study from Orebro found that shy adolescents coped with their social inhibitions by "making themselves decidedly noticeable to others." While this may start as a way to scare off your eighth grade nemesis, it also can result in some pretty cool self-discovery ... and some pretty cool style choices.
8. If you were a shy kid, it could just mean you were growing into a seriously smart adult.
Quiet people have been shown to be better at thoroughly taking in new information and working with accuracy. According to the Center for Applications of Psychological Type , quiet personalities are more likely to be National Merit Scholarship finalists and hold Phi Beta Kappa keys. So, if you were too embarrassed to speak up in Geometry class or wanted to hide every time you saw your ninth-grade crush, you may eventually be compensated for your woes in sheer brainpower.
9. Your non-eventful dating life in high school primed you for a better romantic future.
Remember when all the kids were playing Spin The Bottle while you hid your head in a book? Turns out you were just biding your time until you became a budding Casanova. According to a University of Texas at Austin study, people who have their first sexual experience at a later-than-average age end up having higher levels of education, higher income and, yup, more satisfying romantic relationships.
10. You found amazing friends and allies who were just as kooky as you!
Turns out, being "popular" was never that important. What mattered was the friends you made along your fabulously awkward way!
Teenage you went through a lot. At the time, adolescence simply felt like one big, cruel practical joke played by Mother Nature. But in retrospect, the sum of those awkward-as-hell first kisses and miserable junior high school dances is an adult you who is smarter, more confident and knows that fitting in is a waste of time. Stay weird!
Associate Editor, Viral Content, The Huffington Post

My Most Awkward Sexual Experience (This One's a Doozy)
Feeling brave? This reader had our most awkward sexual experience yet...
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Feeling brave? This reader had our most awkward sexual experience yet...
Growing up, I was wildly inexperienced sexually. I had lots of guy friends, and I had crushes on guys, but I didn't even kiss anyone until I was out of college . So I was living in Chicago and started falling in love with a close guy friend. He was so wonderful in every way. And, to my amazement and happiness, he told me one day that he liked me, too!
We went on a bunch of dates, and everything was blissful. The only catch was that I was really nervous about hooking up. I felt like didn't know how. And since I was 24, I thought I should know. I had asked my best friend how to give a hand job, and she told me it was easy and natural. "You just move your hand up and down," she said. "It will feel right in the moment." Ok, got it.
One night soon afterward, we ended up back at his house. We started kissing, and then we moved into the bedroom. This is it , I thought. We stripped off our clothes and were rolling around. I reached down and put my hand on his, uh, manhood. And then I moved it up and down. Back and forth. Pushing it all the way one way and then all the way the other. Like a PARKING BRAKE.
The catch? He didn't seem to be getting that turned on. What am I doing wrong? I wondered. We kept kissing and everything else was romantic, so the night itself was great, but, in the back of my mind, I was still perplexed.
The next morning, I called my friend. "What gives?" I asked her. She burst into laughter. "Oh no!" she said. "I'm so sorry! You move your hand up and down. He stays in the same place."
Luckily, despite my parking-brake snafu, everything worked out, and now we're happily married. But note to friends: If you're explaining sexual moves, demonstrate on a banana ! These things can be confusing!
Wow! Thanks for sharing. Dear readers, who "taught" you how to do sexual moves before you had ever done them? Did you just naturally figure it out? Or did you get a sense through movies? Friends? Older sisters?
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