Autoblowjob 2

Autoblowjob 2

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Everyone, I’d like to tell you about the Autoblow 2; the second generation of a thing that absolutely no one knew existed. I remember when the Autoblow 2 entered my life. It was a few hours ago, when I was looking for something to write about. Never has there been such a magical time. For those of you who can’t interpret asterisks or figure out what kind of function a machine called the Autoblow 2 might have, I will elaborate. It’s a… thing that a man can put on his… thing, and then it does stuff until the… thing happens. It’s pretty obvious that my parents never gave me The Talk, isn’t it? They gave me a book instead.
At it’s core, the Autoblow 2 is a product for guys who think that Fleshlights are great, but they’re too much work. You know, I don’t want to ruin it for you. I think that you owe it to yourself to watch this video and learn all about it on your own. Oh hey, the video is kinda sorta pretty much NSFW, for language and a trio of rubber dongs. It’s exactly as classy as it sounds. I’ll meet you on the other side when you’re done.
I would have loved to use this opportunity to explore the societal expectations and gender roles when it comes to the purchase and usage of sex toys, but it looks like I used up all of my space making d*ck jokes. Ain’t that the story of my life.

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Zachary Zane
Zachary Zane is a Brooklyn-based writer, speaker, and activist whose work focuses on lifestyle, sexuality, culture, and entertainment.

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The Autoblow AI is the future of all sex toys.
Back in April of this year, I spoke to Brian Sloan , creator of the infamous Autoblow , about how he developed the world’s most popular blowjob machine. Using a series of mechanical beads, the Autoblow applies pressure to your penis, which is comfortably placed inside a silky smooth sleeve.
The Autoblow, to my knowledge, is still the only masturbator that requires you to keep it plugged in to an electrical outlet while it’s in use. This helps generate significantly more power than traditional sex toys, which require batteries or a temporary charge.
Six months ago, Sloan informed me a third generation of the product would be coming out in autumn. Since then, I’ve been patiently waiting for the Autoblow AI to arrive on my doorstep.
Earlier this week, it finally did. Promptly, I ripped the device from its packaging and shoved my dick in it.
Now, I had unrealistically high expectations for the Autoblow AI, since Sloan, a true salesman, made it seem like the AI would revolutionize how we conceptualize sex toys. After all, the Autoblow 2+ XT did. He promised three major changes to this iteration of the Autoblow.
First and foremost, it has the fancy artificial intelligence feature as its 10th setting. The first nine modes are various types of blowjobs, but it’s the same mechanical movement from the machine. The 10th mode combines those other nine techniques at random, so you never receive the same blowjob twice.
Sloan used artificial intelligence to analyze 109 hours of oral sex videos, so these settings—or rather, styles of blowjobs—don't simply apply pressure up and down your junk at random. Each mode is a popular technique of blowjob. Then you can choose from 10 speeds depending on if you’re more of a fan of the slow blow, or like something a little quicker.
Second, it has a pause button that’s easily accessible, so you can, in essence, edge yourself . In layman’s terms, you can hit the pause button right before you’re about to orgasm. You can do that repeatedly, letting the semen build up, until you’re finally ready to release, and when you do, Lord have mercy on that poor, innocent sleeve.
Lastly, it doesn't sound like a wood-chipper. (Alright, those are my words, not his.) But one of the major complaints about the Autoblow 2+ XT was that it was very loud. Sloan listened to his critiques and assured me this one’s noise wouldn't be as distracting.
With these three things in mind, I grabbed some water-based lube, plugged the big fella into the wall, laid on my back, and gently inserted myself into the AI. I typically masturbate on my back, so that’s why I assumed this position. However, the AI also comes with a diagram illustrating numerous positions you can assume with the AI. ( Spoiler : They’re like every position you can do with a partner.)
I turned on the AI, and wow, it definitely takes a few seconds to get used to. When you think your penis is all the way in, it’s not. So thrust in deeper, and that is when it starts to feel really good. I slowly turned up the speeds, and even though I know speed doesn’t impact pressure, it sure felt like the grip got stronger, which I was into. So I turned the speed up all the way. I’ll admit, it does get a little loud at max speed, but it’s still much quieter than the 2+ XT. Also, what do you expect? It’s this big appliance working really quickly; it’s going to make some noise. Nevertheless, when I turned up the volume of the porn on my laptop, it drowned out the sound of the AI.
After reveling in each mode, I finally made it to the main attraction, aka number 10, aka AI, aka the BJ of the future…and it was fucking amazing.
So there was one mode up until 10 that I really liked, but of course, it was the same repetitive motion. But it was a good motion, one that would make me orgasm rather quickly. It’s like if you’ve ever got a blowjob from someone who’s able to deepthroat, apply ample amounts of pressure with their lips, and bob up and down at a rapid speed. You orgasm quickly, and it’s good, but when you’ve finished, you’re like, “Wait, that was too good.” That’s because it ends as quickly as it starts without any build.
The AI included that incredible BJ style, along with eight others. This not only prolonged the experience, but also made it feel more authentic because like a real BJ, the AI contains movements that you do love, but also ones that aren’t really doing anything for you.
Finally, when I was about to ejaculate, I hit the pause button, but I was a little too late, since I was already past the point-of-no-return. So I unpaused it and let the AI do its thing.
The only thing I wish was that if you clicked past speed 10, it would take you back to speed 1. That would be helpful for after you ejaculated, when you’re feeling extra sensitive, but don’t want the sensation to stop immediately. Unfortunately, as it is now, I had to quickly press the “down” button 9 times, otherwise there was too much stimulation.
Nevertheless, did Sloan deliver on his promises? Yes, he did. Does it feel really good ejaculating into something without moving your arm up and down? Yeah, that was pretty cool. And last but not least, do I recommend the Autoblow AI for the man tired of using his own calloused hands? Oh, absolutely.

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