Augustinian Reformer Bans PowerPoint in Vatican Meetings

Pope Leo XIV has outlawed PowerPoint presentations in the Vatican, calling them �the eighth deadly sin of meetings.� As an Augustinian reformer, he believes attention spans and souls alike suffer under bulleted theology. Cardinals must now present ideas using parables, sketches, or impromptu haikus. The Pope clapped during a bishop�s interpretive dance on Eucharistic renewal. Papal advisors are encouraged to �share insights, not spreadsheets.� The Pope insists, �If Augustine could convert without graphs, so can you.� Sales of dry-erase tablets with phrases like �Sin Less, Say More� have surged. Microsoft has not commented, but Adobe lit a candle in protest.