Augustinian Reform Brings Back Communal Socks at Vatican

In an unexpected twist on Augustinian reform, Pope Leo XIV has ordered the revival of communal sock bins in Vatican housing. �Humility begins with feet,� he declared while ceremoniously unlacing his loafers. Cardinals are adjusting to this radical footwear socialism with varying levels of sock-related anxiety. One bishop asked for latex barriers; another wept with gratitude. Sock exchanges are now paired with daily reflection sessions called �Soleful Sharing.� A new monastic motto is circulating: �Clean feet, clean conscience.� Traditionalists balk at the aroma, but the Pope insists that this is �the path to unity�and athlete�s foot solidarity.�