Asstr Christmas

🔞 ALL INFORMATION CLICK HERE 👈🏻👈🏻👈🏻

Asstr Christmas
(Mg, gg, Mb, MF, inc, best, mc, Xmas, humor)
"Oh my god! You've got to be kidding me! This is so unfair. Daddy, no! It's not fair, it's not fair! I wanted the puppy - I've always wanted a pet - you can't do this!!"
"Amanda, stop yelling," daddy said. "It's Christmas for heaven's sake."
"But daddy! NO! It's not fair. You KNEW I wanted a puppy. She can't have my puppy!" Amanda grabbed the one-year-old golden retriever and tried to pull him out of her little sister Lisa's happy arms.
"Amanda! That's quite enough!" Daddy yelled and he pulled Amanda away from the fluffy soft dog. "The dog is Lisa's present!" The dog gave Lisa another big lick on her beaming face.
"Oh my god!" Amanda screamed. "I hate you, I hate you! This is so fucked up!"
"Amanda!" Amanda's mother snapped. "I will not have that kind of language from you. Especially not on Christmas!"
"And I don't care what you think! I was the one who was supposed to get a pet! Not that stupid little bitch!"
"That's it!" mother snapped and grabbed Amanda by the arm. She marched her eleven-year-old back towards the bedrooms. "You can just spend the rest of the day in your room, little miss."
Trevor ran excitedly into the living room where a Christmas tree was merrily lit. Trevor stopped in his tracks and stared, open mouthed, at the odd man who was sitting cross-legged on the floor next to the tree wearing full firefighting gear, complete with a fireman's helmet and a red Christmas bow stuck on top. "Who, who are you? Are you a real fireman?" Trevor asked with youthful excitement.
"I sure am!" the man said, rising to his full four-foot five stature. "Turk the Fireman, at your service, Trevor. Put it there, my boy. And Merry Christmas!"
Trevor stared at the dwarf fireman, who was clearly an adult even if he was only about three inches taller than Trevor. That was confusing. But he was a real fireman - how exciting! So Trevor reached out and shook the short man's hand. "Wow," he said, "are you my present from Santa?"
"I sure am, sonny boy, and I'm here to teach you all about being a fireman - and all the great things firemen do together with their big long firehoses. Won't that be fun?"
A sweet-looking little red-headed girl named Sarah was just waking up in her bed. She stretched and yawned and then her eyes flew open as she remembered it was Christmas morning. "Yes, yes!" Sarah cried out and she threw her covers off. She jumped out of bed in her bright red pajamas. But Sarah stumbled, and nearly fell to the floor. Her sense of balance was completely wrong and she staggered, almost falling again. She looked into her mirror and saw that her normally loose pajama blouse was pulled incredibly tight across her chest. As she tried to stand up straight one of the buttons actually popped off. In shock, little Sarah put her hands to her front and felt big balloons of something under her pajamas. And terrifyingly, she realized that the big balloons felt her hands! They were part of her.
As quick as she could, little Sarah unbuttoned her pajamas and opened them wide. She stared in abject shock at what she'd discovered, and even as she stared the nipples on the huge, perfect breasts contracted in the cold air and sent a strange ache through her eight-year-old frame. There was only one thing poor little Sarah could think to do - as loud as she could she screamed "Daddy!!"
"Santa, sir, please, wake up. Wake up!"
"Holy mother of goodness, pipe down!" Santa said. He groaned and rolled over in bed, blinking at the pretty elf who was shaking his shoulder. "Not so loud. Oh, my poor head!"
"Oh goodness, he's been at the Schnapps again!" the elf said out loud. "He's hungover. Such a disgrace!" She shook Santa's shoulder again. "Sir, please! We've got four red alerts, four!"
"Ow! Quiet down, for the love of goodness. You try delivering half a billion presents in a single night, give or take twenty million, and see if you don't want to have a wee little drink or ten afterwards. Wait, what's that you said?"
"We haven't had four red alerts at the same time in a hundred years," Santa said, finally coming fully awake. "I can barely ever remember having two at once - oh wait, there was that time..." Santa started to sit up. "Ow, man, my head! Alright, alright, give me a minute. Get out of here, ya' bossy little thing. I'll be there in two twists of a candy cane. Goodness. Where's the Alka Seltzer? Ow!"
A few minutes later Santa, holding his head, walked into the control room of North Pole central where a dozen elves were working at a huge array of monitors. "Alright, Judy, what's all this about a red alert."
"We've got four of them, sir, all in the same sector." The elf consulted her screen. "Sector 437D/512beta. I've never seen two alerts in the same sector, ever. And we've got four of them. I took the liberty of ordering full surveillance at all four venues. Bernard's teams are already deployed - we should have video within the hour."
"Good thinking, Judy" Santa said and the pretty little elf bit her lip to keep from smiling too obviously. "But wait, that sector sounds familiar. Where's that sector?"
The little elf, who had thick dark hair cascading down to her waist, looked to be at most nine-years-old although she'd actually seen several centuries go by. She studied her schematics closely. "Averageville," she answered.
"Santa, sir, language! Please!" the offended elf shot back. She glanced about to make sure that none of the other elves had fainted. All was well, although several of the nearer elves had blushed at Santa's swearing.
"No time for that, Judy," Santa said, brushing aside the elf's disdain. Then he said to himself "I knew I shouldn't have tried that damnable Jamaican Lion. Why in heck did they have to go and legalize pot in that state?"
"Santa!" Judy the Elf gasped. Swearing AND drugs. She nearly fainted.
"Not now, not now, Judy. Do you have exact coordinates? I need information to figure out what the fu...., I mean what in goodness happened. I need data!"
"Yes, of course, sir," Judy said rather stiffly. "Here's the first address - cross referencing to the gift data base now. Wait, wait, got it! I'm showing a gift recording for Cindy, age twenty. She's on the 'good at least most of the time' list. And the gift request transcript reads: 'really wants a couple of cats, easy enough, let's just go with a pair of kitties.'"
"Kitties? Yes, yes, I remember something about kitties." Santa perked up. "But I was pretty stoned when I was in Averageville. You know how it is."
"Really! Sir, I certainly do NOT know how it is. The very thought is horrible!" Judy the Elf harrumphed and held her nose high in the air.
"Oh get over yourself, gorgeous," Santa said with a smirk and he pinched the pretty elf's bottom.
"Santa! Oh!" Judy the Elf cried out, then said through gritted teeth in the hopes that no one else could hear. "Not in front of the others!"
"Besides, I don't see how the heck a pair of kitties could be a red alert." Santa ducked the death rays from Judy's eyes at the word 'heck' and continued. "I think your machine is calibrated wrong. I'm sure it's nothing. You know these things almost always work themselves out for the best. You're such a worry-elf, Judy."
"Well, here's the second address, and the gift recording." Judy the Elf continued. "Ah, look, the date stamp is just five minutes later than the other one. This one's registered to Sarah, age eight, on the 'very good' list. The gift request transcript reads 'looking for love, needs some enhancement, let's go with a nice big pair of titties.' Oh! Oh my! I really don't think..."
"Oh shit." Santa said, interrupting Judy and turning even more pale than usual behind his long white beard, mustache and voluminous snowy eyebrows.
"Really! Santa, language! I must insist!" Judy the Elf actually stomped her pretty little booted foot on the ground and pursed her gorgeous little lips in the cutest expression of disdain.
"Oh wow, this could be bad, very bad. Bring up the video record, Judy. We have to make sure."
Judy the Elf worked the controls for several seconds, frowning at Santa's terrible language, and then a somewhat grainy image flashed up onto one of the screens. A cute little girl, in a pretty Christmas dress was perched on Santa's knee at the mall. Even with the poor video quality Santa's bloodshot eyes were apparent, and the little girl scrunched up her nose at the smell of pot that wafted off of an obviously stoned Santa. But the little girl was game and she quietly answered Santa's questions.
"Yeah, so, like, how old are you, Sarah?" Santa asked the child.
"Awesome, wow. That's like, so cool. And, ah, what was that other question I was gonna ask? Ahhh, somethin', somethin', yeah, yeah, got it! Cool. So, like, what do you want for, ah, what is it, ah Christmas, yeah Christmas. What do you want for Christmas?"
"Oh! I, I really want a couple of kittens. Please? Kitties would be so nice to cuddle with. I don't have anybody to cuddle with. Please can I have a pair of kitties?" The red-headed tyke looked up with her big eyes and anyone's heart would have melted.
"Oh, wow, that's so cool. Yeah, yeah - I'll make sure I remember that one. So, like, nice to meet you Sarah, and have a really rad Christmas, 'kay?"
"Oh Santa, you didn't!" Judy the Elf said with shock as the video ended.
"Hey, I was really stoned. It was a bad time. Give me a break - gosh golly." Santa said. But he blushed deeply. "Go on, show the other one, Judy. Just to be sure."
Judy mumbled "I should never have gotten him started on hot chocolate," under her breath as she worked the console. Another grainy image filled the screen. Sarah's red hair could be seen a couple of children back in the line and a little boy was just getting off of Santa's lap and returning to a young woman who stood to one side.
"What about you, princess?" Santa said to the woman before she could turn and walk away with the little boy. She turned, startled, and raised her eyebrows. "Yeah, babe, it's cool. Don't 'cha wanna tell Santa what you want for Christmas. I bet you want somethin' sexy! Yeah."
The woman walked up to Santa and leaned in. She was very pretty, though she was noticeably flat chested. "I think I'm a little old for sitting on Santa's lap."
"Man, girl, don't be such a downer." Santa whined. "Come on. Santa won't bite, unless you want him to. What's your name, gorgeous?" Flustered, the young woman let Santa pull her onto his lap. His eyes flashed gold and she gasped slightly.
"Really, Santa, you know you shouldn't," Judy the Elf snorted at the sight of Santa ass-grabbing the girl on the screen.
Santa smirked at the green-eyed elf, and as she turned back to the screen he grabbed her little child-like ass and gave it a squeeze. She stiffened and looked around quickly to make sure none of the other elves were watching. But then she leaned back into him with a smile and a little sigh.
Back on the screen the blonde woman said her name was Cindy, then leaned close to whisper into Santa's ear. Judy turned up the volume and they heard the girl say "..and I really think I could find a nice guy, if I just had bigger, you know, bigger..."
Santa, on the video, whispered back, "Whoah, dudette, you'd look so hot with big ones, yeah. 'Though, ya know, I'm like, totally good with little ones - in fact, they, like, kind of turn me on..."
"OH MY GOODNESS," Judy the Elf said, twisting to glare at Santa. "You're disgusting!"
"You know that's just Christmas flirting," Santa said. "It's expected - it doesn't mean... wait, here's the part we have to hear."
The girl on the video, Cindy, said "... okay, okay, what I really want for christmas is a pair of big, you know..., titties. OH!" She giggled adorably and turned bright red as she hid her lips behind her hand before she added, "I can't believe I said that. You're such a naughty Santa." Then she kissed Santa on the cheek, leapt from his lap and grabbed her nephew as she quickly escaped.
"So, that settles it for sure," Santa said. "I really scr..., ah, messed up the pooch. Didn't I?" He looked at Judy the Elf with chagrin. "Hey - pair of kitties, pair of titties, Cindy, Sarah - I was stoned. It happens."
"Santa! It doesn't 'just happen!' This is intolerable. You gave an eight-year-old a pair of, of... oh, I can't say it! You have to do something."
"Go fix it, you big fat pile of oh-my-goodness! That poor child. And the woman too. Our records show she's allergic to cats. You've got to fix this. Go!"
"Wait, wait, wait," Santa said. "Hold your reindeer. You know these things almost always work out on their own. Stop being such a worry-elf."
"Santa, there is no way this is going to ..." Judy the Elf started to say.
"Didn't you say there were four red alerts, Judy, sweet Judy," Santa said, working to distract his favorite elf. "We'd better check them all out before we make any rash decisions. By then maybe we'll have our surveillance."
Amanda sulked in her room, alone, on Christmas day. This was so, so, wrong! And her stupid, fucking, nasty, bitchy little sister was out there playing with her new puppy! Ooooh! Amanda had been begging for a pet for two long years. She'd done everything she could think of to show how mature and responsible she'd be. And they'd gone and given stupid Lisa a puppy! Aaaghh!
Amanda picked up the small Christmas present she'd been holding when they sent her to her room and hurled it against her door as hard as she could. It gave off a satisfying thunk, but immediately she was ever so slightly contrite. She didn't even know who the present was from. It probably wasn't their fault.
Picking up the small, slightly dented box, Amanda read the label. 'To Amanda, from Santa.' Santa, sure, NOT. Stupid parents. Stupid parents who let Lisa have a puppy! She'd show them, She'd unwrap the present and smash it into a billion pieces. Amanda pulled off the paper and opened the outer box. There was a small jewelry box inside, and a folded up pice of paper. Amanda read the paper with growing confusion. It hardly seemed to make any sense. Strangest was the final ominous warning, "It is extremely important that you choose carefully. Once chosen, you may not change your mind. It is a grave responsibility and final, so choose wisely."
Totally confused now, Amanda threw the instructions into the mess on her desk. She flipped open the little velvet box to find a simple, but very pretty stone ring - maybe even jade. She was intrigued. But then, she thought, it's no replacement for a pet! She slammed the little box down and went back to pouting.
Daddy came at a run. He'd never heard his little girl give off such a forlorn and terrified scream. But when he plowed into her room wearing nothing but his boxer shorts, he came to screeching halt. The vision before him was difficult to make sense of. It was his little Sarah - the same cute round face, the same broad perfect nose, the same sprinkle of freckles, the same long thick red hair. She was the right height, the right size the right portions. All except for the most amazing and perfect pair of large, perky, melon-shaped breasts.
Sarah stood in the middle of the room, her hands in little fists at her side, and tears streamed down her face. "Daddy?" she said forlornly at the look of complete shock and apprehension on her father's face.
Daddy stared, wide eyed, for just one more moment, and then he went to his little girl and scooped her into his arms, big breasts and all. He sat on the edge of her bed with her in his lap and he stroked her hair. "Oh baby, baby, don't be scared. It's going to be fine. It is."
"But daddy, you..." Sarah said tearfully.
"No, no baby, it's fine. I promise, everything will be fine." Daddy pulled Sarah to his chest and she buried her face against him as he rocked her back and forth.
"D-daddy?" little Sarah snuffled into daddy's chest. "Wh-what is that big hard thing in your shorts?"
"Okay, sir, I've tracked down the next red alert. The time stamp puts it about half an hour after those other two."
"Let's start with the video record, Judy," Santa said.
A few seconds later a grainy video showed Santa, still visibly stoned, as a little boy of seven or eight climbed up into his lap. He was a cute little lad, with a mop of curly brown hair and a button nose.
"Hey, little dude! Give Santa a high five," Santa said to the little boy who looked at him perplexed, then raised his little hand and pushed it against Santa's. "Yo, cool. So, like, what's your name, little man?"
"Uh, Trevor?" the little boy answered.
"Whoah, cool! I used to know a Trevor, back in the day. He was like, the biggest pussy-chaser I ever met."
"OH MY GOODNESS! SANTA! Really!" Judy the Elf spun around and forcefully punched Santa on the arm. Her little pointed ears turned bright red with embarrassment and anger.
"Wh-what's a pussy-chaser?" the little boy asked innocently.
"Oh man, it's like a..., whoah, that lady over there looks kinda pissed."
"Whoah, little dude, what a MILF. But hey, so, like, what d'ya want for the C-day, man?"
"Christmas, little man. Like, what d'ya want?"
"Oh! I, I want a Manny the Firetruck! I want it more than anything! It's so neat. You can ride on it! And it talks to you. And it has a real engine. And, and, it has a real firehose, that you can squirt water out of and put out real fires and everything. It's the best!"
"Whoah, little dude, that sounds so cool. Yeah. Well, you, like, be a good little dude for your hot mom and maybe, just maybe, you'll get your Manny the Firetruck!"
As the screen faded, Santa said, "That hardly looked like something to turn into a red alert. I'm telling you Judy, your machine is just not calibrated right."
"Humph!" Judy snorted, and patted her console as if to soothe it. "We'll just see about that! Let me pull up the transcript."
"Whatever, you saucy little elf-bait."
"Santa! You are so naughty." Judy acted offended, but when she turned from Santa she blushed and bit her lip. "Okay, here, I've got the address. Yes, it's Trevor, seven-years-old, definitely on the good list - and the gift request transcript reads: 'this little dude is really into real fire fighting, so, let's give him some quality time with Turk the Fireman.'" There was a pause as Judy the Elf's eyes went big as saucers. "Oh my! Santa, not Turk! You didn't. Oh Santa, this is terrible. It's horrible!"
"Judy, Judy, calm down!" Santa said, holding his arms out to ward off the look of horror on the pretty, childish face of Judy the Elf. "I know, I know, this seems bad - I can see how maybe this would show up as a red al..."
"How could you?! I thought Turk was still in jail. Did you spring him out? Oh my goodness! Swearing, drinking, philandering, drugs and now felonies? You, you...!"
"Judy, calm down. You're scaring the other elves," Santa pleaded. And indeed, two of the other elves had fainted at the infamous name of Turk the Fireman. Several others were cowering at their workstations. "It's going to be okay. But you know these things almost always work out for the best! I know it seems implausible, right this second, but I'm sure it's going to be fine. We'll monitor the situation, but please, calm down."
Lisa felt terrible for her sister, but she LOVED her new golden retriever, Hugger. He was so sweet and fluffy and full of energy! She played with him adoringly. He even let her put one of daddy's sweaters on him! It was adorable. She just couldn't wait to show her sister how good and wonderful her new doggy was. So Lisa made sure mommy and daddy were busy clearing up the clutter in the living room, she grabbed a handful of sugar cookies from the kitchen and she snuck back to Amanda's room with Hugger. She knocked on the door, very softly, then pushed it open.
Amanda was still pouting, but enough time had passed to take the edge off of her burning anger. She decided to take another look at the green ring in the l
Boy Cock Stories
Reinaleone
Takarada Monami