Asshole Money

Asshole Money
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Asshole: How I Got Rich and Happy by Not Giving a Shit About You is a 2008 spoof self-help book and memoir by American author Martin Kihn . The book's title in the U.S. was modified to A$$hole: How I Got Rich & Happy by Not Giving a Damn About Anyone & How You Can, Too .

"In corporate America, if you are ambitious, or if you just want to go for the big money, it more than helps to be an asshole."
The first line of Marty Kihn's book, is "I was the nicest guy in the world and it was killing me." [1] Kihn, who works for a marketing company, is told by his boss that unless he started "playing hardball", they were going to demote him and upgrade a colleague Kihn calls " The Nemesis " to a window office. [1] So to save his career, Kihn decides to turn himself into an asshole, and in telling his story, he describes exactly how the reader can follow his lead. [1]

To become an asshole, Kihn builds a team, consisting of an acting coach, life coach and both personal and dog trainer – to help "master the art of assholism." [1] Kihn then creates a ten-step "assholism" program which involves "ignoring other peoples’ feelings, never saying sorry, dressing in black silk and only eating red meat." [2] Other tasks saw Kihn signing up to the National Rifle Association , learning kickboxing, screaming at colleagues and eating garlic bagels on public transport. [3] Additionally, Kihn takes inspiration from famous figures whom he considers " assholes " such as: Donald Trump , Rudy Giuliani , Martha Stewart , David Letterman , Ayn Rand , Nicole Kidman , Niccolò Machiavelli , Scarface and Paris Hilton . [1] He also takes inspiration from Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead and The Virtue of Selfishness . [1]

In speaking on his motivations for compiling the work, Kihn stated:

I'd spent a lifetime seeing therapists and psychiatrists, and following things like The Warrior Diet . I guess I wanted to parody those types of books and move away from the whiny, self-centred, introspective stuff towards real action. [2]
In the end, he is successful. By "finding the balls to act like an asshole, he crushes The Nemesis", gets a promotion, then nets a large sum of cash, and a second home into the bargain, by selling the book to Hollywood for a six-figure sum . [1] Warner Brothers also paid $500,000 for the film rights to his memoirs before he'd even written them. [2]

In reviewing the work, Booklist remarked that "Kihn's got a great ear for dialogue - and a comedic sense worthy of Second City", while Publishers Weekly stated that "like an above-average Adam Sandler movie, this mix of racy humor and overt sentiment will probably get both a bigger audience, and less credit, than it deserves." [4]

Robert Sutton, author of New York Times bestseller The No Asshole Rule gave the book a positive review, declaring "A$$hole is one of the funniest books I've ever read, and "remarkably useful in a sick sort of way." [5] Additionally, Rory Freeman, co-author of The New York Times bestseller Skinny Bitch , described the text as "remarkably profane, laugh-out-loud funny, and surprisingly sentimental", while John Alexander, author of How To Become an Alpha Male , opined that "through humor and vivid storytelling, Martin Kihn takes you through that journey until he discovers an astonishing lesson." [5]

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If I asked you to identify the biggest asshole in your life right now, how quickly would you be able to come up with a name? Some of us might be able to list three or four assholes with whom we interact on a daily basis, plus all of the anonymous assholes who cut us off in traffic, cut in front of us in line, and otherwise make our lives miserable.
I interviewed Robert Sutton, Stanford business professor and author of The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal With People Who Treat You Like Dirt , to learn how to identify an asshole, how to deal with assholes, and how to get rid of assholes when necessary.
Want to know how to identify the assholes in your life? Start with your own emotional responses. “You have an asshole problem if you are dealing with somebody who leaves you feeling demeaned, de-energized, disrespected,” Sutton says. “Somebody who makes you feel like dirt.”
The problem is that sometimes our feelings can play tricks on us, and the meta-emotions surrounding issues of workplace and family hierarchy mean that we might be too quick to ascribe assholery to what might otherwise be called assertiveness or boundary-setting. (No, your kids aren’t assholes for not enthusiastically responding to your “how was your day?” interrogation every time they return from school—even though their unwillingness to talk might make you feel like dirt.)
Don’t ask your kid what happened at school that day. Just don’t.
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If you want to be sure that you’re dealing with a true asshole, look for clearly obnoxious behaviors, especially those that are intentionally demeaning or rude. Another good way to tell if someone is an asshole is to ask other people for confirmation: are they interpreting this person’s behavior in the same way you are?
Keep in mind that there’s a difference between a person who occasionally exhibits asshole behavior and a certified asshole. As Sutton explains: “All of us, under the wrong conditions, can be temporary assholes. Certified assholes are people who consistently make people feel like dirt over time.”
There’s also one more reason you might feel like you’re surrounded by assholes: you’re actually the asshole . “You’re treating people like dirt and they’re throwing the shit back,” says Sutton.
You're a hypocrite who thinks you're the best person who has ever lived, but you're not alone.…
There’s no one-size-fits-all strategy for dealing with assholes. If the assholery is run-of-the-mill, non-abusive stuff (think line cutters, interrupters, those people who make every conversation about themselves or feel obligated to comment on every little thing you do), you might have to grin and bear it—literally.
“Reframe the situation,” Sutton advises, “so it doesn’t touch your soul and it doesn’t upset you quite so much.”
Sutton suggests taking one of five strategies:
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If an asshole is abusive, or if they’re making so many people feel like dirt that it’s causing significant problems, it might be time to get rid of the asshole.
The first step in getting rid of an asshole, Sutton advises, is to consider how much power you have over them. Do you have the power to fire them? Can you stop inviting them to group events or family gatherings? Sometimes it’s relatively easy to remove an asshole from a situation—although it’s never easy to tell someone that they’re being laid off.
We’ve told you how to prepare if you think you’re going to lose your job, and this tool will even…
If you don’t have individual power over an asshole, you might have more power in a group. Sutton notes the tipping point that came in relation to sexual abusers Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein, as more people started sharing their stories. “Each one has more and more power and the asshole has less and less power.”
This isn’t meant to conflate asshole behavior and sexual abuse—although it’s probably fair to call sexual abusers assholes, among other terms—but it is intended to give you a guide as to how to address the behavior if you don’t have a lot of power in the situation. For example: ask your peers whether they see the same asshole behavior you see. Some people might be relieved that they’re not the only one who’s noticed it, and together you might be able to find a solution—or force someone with more power to pay attention.
How do you deal with the assholes in your life? Which of Sutton’s strategies are you most likely to incorporate into your next asshole encounter? Let us know in the comments.

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