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Happy Ending Massage in Pattaya
Last updated: August 12th, 2020
| in Central Thailand | Chonburi | Pattaya | Thai Girls
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What’s your idea of a perfect day in Pattaya? Maybe you wake up late at around 11am because you had a night out at the bars and night clubs.
So the first thing after you took a shower is to head to one of the restaurants for a big brunch. One hour later it’s just noon and really too early (and hot) to go anywhere, so you relax in your room for a couple of hours, watching the news channel of your home country.
Then at around 2pm you decide to take a walk around, and since you don’t want to start drinking that early and have plans to go for a swim at around 4pm, followed by a stroll around the beach promenade at 5:30pm for sunset, a few drinks and pool games in the girly bars at 6:30pm, in between some dinner, checking out a couple of new go go bars at 9pm and hitting the night club at midnight:
So what’s the perfect thing to do during the “lame” hours between like 2pm and 4pm? Right, visiting one of the many, many, many happy ending massage salons around Pattaya.
Average Prices in Pattaya’s Massage Salons – extras are negotiated with the girl in the room, usually during the second half of the massage after you turned around:
Interesting fact: The standard massage prices are about 100 Baht cheaper here than in the happy ending massage salons in Bangkok .
It’s quite important to note that most of the girls in the massage salons are only offering hand jobs these days. So if you are out for sex then you should know which area to visit (for example Soi Buakhao would be good) and if you are out for a blow job or sex then Soi 6 would be the best place to go (or simply one of the many blow job bars ). On the other hand, you may find yourself in a shop on Beach Road with your masseuse in a long traditional dress and not willing to provide any happy ending at all.
So in this guide I will give you the full overview of the different areas with massage salons in Pattaya, so that you can visit the right places depending on what you want. As always I will include a map with the locations of all places mentioned.
What makes a perfect area for naughty massage salons? First, it should be frequented by a lot of tourists. Second, it should not have too many bars around that distract the street walkers. And third, the rent should be still moderate (which is not the case on Beach Road). So guess where this area in Pattaya is located: Second Road. You could easily walk up and down this street for one hour and pass more than 50 massage salons with girls in tight tops and short skirts sitting outside and yelling at you “Hey, handsome man, welcome massage!” One of the best areas in Pattaya to get a happy ending and I’d recommend you to check out this one first.
You could easily spend several days in the Buakhao area alone and not get bored. There are so many neat bars, restaurants and guesthouses around, not to forget the second biggest go go bar area in town: Soi LK Metro. And on top of that, you will find some of the best happy ending massage salons in all of Pattaya. When I say best I mean that the girls are among the youngest and most attractive ones, in some shops not even bothering to wear any massage uniform at all but their own sexy outfits. And even better: Massages are as cheap as 150 Baht for Thai and 200 Baht for Oil. The best area in Buakhao in this category is Soi Chaloem Phrakiat 25 just south of Soi Excite (see the map at the end of the guide) where you will find a real massage paradise.
When you think about Walking Street it’s probably not massage salons that come into your mind but rather the famous go go bars . And so most of the masseuses in this area aren’t really the creme de la creme of this industry, simply because the majority of the people come here for the go go bars and night clubs. It’s not that many salons on Walking Street anyway, about half a dozen, so you can just take a look while walking around and see if you find someone nice.
Seriously not the best area for a happy ending massage in Pattaya. You won’t find a lot of salons here since the rents are the highest in town and so it’s simply not very profitable for a small shop on Beach Road. What you will mostly find are higher priced spas and from the very few “traditional” massage salons the quality of the ladies is rather average, most of them wear traditional Thai dresses and might not even be willing to give you that hand job in exchange for some tip.
There are plenty of Sois connecting Second Road with Beach Road, and Soi 13/2 is the one that catches everyone’s eyes in terms of massage salons with huge and colorful signs above the street. There are also some beer bars and even BJ bars (Kittens & Pump Station) in here, but when you walk though it it’s probably the massage girls that will get your attention – they are among the hottest and naughtiest you can find in Pattaya.
Several dozen of massage salons can be found all around South Pattaya, and especially along Second Road just down from the intersection with South Pattaya Road. It’s those places where 90% of all ladies are sitting outside and smiling at pretty much every Farang passing by. You will find more shops (though not so concentrated) if you walk along South Pattaya Road all the way towards the intersection with Third Road. And if you haven’t found anything nice, then there’s also one very popular bar right on this intersection with great views all around:
Most people think of short time bars when they hear “Soi 6” and maybe also ladyboys , but there are also quite a few massage salons spread along the 400m long strip (mostly on the western part though). And what makes them so special: The girls in there are usually more than ready to give you any happy ending you wish, be it hand job, be it blow job or be it sex. As already mentioned, this is quite uncommon at most salons around Pattaya these days that mostly only offer handjobs.
Nakluea is how they refer to North Pattaya. If you haven’t heard about it: Take a songthaew (10 Baht shared pickup taxi) on Second Road all the way up to the dolphin roundabout. Many passengers get off there because it’s going back south on Beach Road. From there you just need to cross North Pattaya Road to the other side of the dolphin roundabout and you will get to Pattaya-Nakluea Road that’s very, very long. There is a new promenade with restaurants and bars right there (among them many Germans), but the further you go down this street the more quiet it gets – still with many cheap massage salons here and there. The girls may not be the hottest around, but this is actually one of the places where you can still get hand jobs for 300 Baht if you do some negotiating.
Jomtien is technically a different city 5km south of Pattaya. But since it’s so easy, quick and cheap to get there from the South Pattaya Road / Second Road Intersection with one of the 10 Baht Songthaews I thought it’s better to just include it on this list. Just get off on Jomtien Sai Neung (which means Jomtien First Road) and is basically the Beach Road of Jomtien. Not sure why they don’t just call it like that. Anyway, there aren’t really that many massage salons right on this main road (as you can see on the picture) but rather inside the countless of side Sois. It’s really just about strolling around and taking a look at what’s available. Don’t expect the most attractive masseuses here who would mostly work in Pattaya because of better business. But still, there are always exceptions and prices for the happy endings also tend to be a little cheaper than elsewhere.
I hope you have a good overview now of the happy ending massage industry in Pattaya and where to find the best areas depending on what you are out for (I’m sure you have).
One thing to note is that some salons have a queue, means basically a piece of paper with the names of all masseuses and a checklist showing how many customers they had so far today. So don’t expect that they ask you to choose a particular girl like in the soapy massage parlors .
However, that doesn’t mean that you cannot just demand one of the ladies you like – just be polite, tell them and it is usually fine. In many areas (especially Soi 13/2, Soi Buakhao and Soi 6) it’s completely different though and it’s usually the girl who does a good job in calling in customers than the one who is next on the list.
And one final note: Of course there are even more areas than the ones mentioned in this guide – but these are the main and best ones. If you have visited all of them you could also take a look on 3rd Road and the many alleys connecting Second Road with Beach Road (Pattaya Soi 1 to Soi 13/4). Have fun and stay happy.
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If the opportunity to open start a sex massage business in Bangkok falls on my lap, I’d turn it down in a heart beat. I think many guys would die for the opportunity to be the pimp in charge. To be surrounded by a dozen big breasted, shaved below beauties every single day.
Alas, that’s not the reality of it all.
I can’t tell you what it’s like to own a massage shop serving up happy endings to men in Bangkok. Because I’ve never done it. The next best thing is to tell you about a guy who did.
His name is Gerald and here’s his tale.
I met Gerald four years ago through Rob and Roy. The two idiots I wrote about for how to arrange a two guy one girl threesome in Thailand .
Rob and Roy are total blabber mouths that can’t keep their mouths shut about anything. We all met up one night at a party and one of them told Gerald to talk to me about promoting his place of business. It was the first time the both of us met.
I didn’t know anything about him. Except he was in the import/export business. And that he is wealthy as fuck. You can just sense it when you’re around him. He just oozes douchiness. And all he knew about me was that I studied walruses before retirement.
Gerald looked at me. And I looked back at him. Then both of us gave those idiots a strange look. The same look you give someone that shouldn’t be telling secrets to shut the hell up. I didn’t know Gerald’s secret and he didn’t know mine.
But the cats out of the bag as the saying goes. We found out we had something in common. Gerald discovered I write this shitty blog reviewing sex massage shops . And I found out he owns a shitty massage shop with really ugly hookers near the deep end of Phrom Phong red light district in Bangkok.
This guy hails from one of the wealthiest European nations. His daddy’s wealth originated all the way back to the days when Europeans were slave trading. It’s as old money as it gets. His mommy is a socialite, because why not.
His parents got married and Gerald was born in a posh hospital with the view of a magnificent ancient castle. The castle which is just a symbol of the wealth he will inherit and a guarantee that he’s going to be on top of the shit heap overlooking down on us peasants fighting for leftovers.
From then on its lavish childhood birthdays with the most expensive champagne. Morning horse riding and archery lessons followed by evenings of cello and violin lessons. Going water skiing on his family’s speed boat on Lake Como and eating the finest cheese and crackers money can buy. On his sixteenth birthday his father took him to the best brothels in the alps where the hottest hookers welcomed him into manhood.
Okay, so I made up that whole last paragraph. I don’t know much about the shit he went through during his young adult life and frankly I don’t care. I just imagined this is the sort of thing rich stuffy European people do. And to give Gerald a good laugh reading this. Although, after letting him read this before posting he said I wasn’t far off.
Then one day, as if life didn’t think Gerald was being treated fairly enough, he was given a position to manage a European company in Japan for a few years. And finally another in Thailand where he is now currently.
He’s only in his late 30’s still in the prime of his life. And he’s single and plans to stay that way until he’s dead. Smart guy…
His move to Thailand was all paid for. His travel expenses were all taken care. Including a generous expense account for taking clients out to lavish dinners and top shelf whores for dessert.
He gets to live inside a house inside a posh neighborhood in Bangkok rent free. A couple of servants are thrown in for good measure and a car with a driver on 24 hours call.
Of course from Gerald’s prospective this is nothing special. He’s humble in that kind of way. I told him that to me, his life is equivalent to winning three jackpot lotteries at the same time. Twice in the same year.
Gerald started dating and getting close to a high class Thai call girl. She eventually became his close confidant, assistant, translator and booty call. Yes, there are exclusive escort services for the rich in Thailand with exceptionally high class hookers. The likes us of us will never, ever see or lay our grubby hands on.
Long story short she became his trusted fixer. One day she presented him with the opportunity to take over a failing full service massage shop inside Phrom Phong. Her older sister worked inside and told her the current owner was looking to sell cheap and get out fast.
Gerald has never been to the sleazy massage shops of Bangkok for a game of hide the schnitzel. Even though he takes out of town clients for some fun around Bangkok’s red light districts. He usually takes everyone to Thai style gentleman’s clubs. With his classic handsome European features he’s got no problem getting into those girls’ panties.
His clients however, are a different story. They’re older, bald, short with floppy abs and man boobs like me. He had to think of an effective strategy to entertain his clients without jerking them off himself.
So when he got a call from his fixer about a potential business opportunity where he could make his clients “happy” he decided to go for it. He didn’t have to take the business. He did it out of curiosity.
With Gerald as an insider, I could find out certain aspects of this type of business without being too nosy with the other massage shops I frequent.
But I can freely write about this now because after 4 years of running his sex shop he decided to shut it down. It wasn’t making money and he found a buyer and sold at a lost. I can’t name the shop because the new owner has kept the shop’s name. And it’s just as crappy as when Gerald ran the shop, if not worse.
Here’s what I found out about the business after spending time with Gerald. Starting from one of the most important aspects of running a brothel in Thailand.
From the comments and emails I receive on a constant basis, sexually transmitted diseases is a major topic. Everyone should be as careful as they possibly can. Check your dicks and make sure there are no scratches.
But seriously, Gerald says every single girl that wants to work at his shop must be accompanied by his trusted confidant to a hospital for health check-up. Most of the businesses involved in the sex industry require their workers to go get regular medical check ups too.
There is no law that requires prostitutes to be checked. No laws. It’s up to the owners of brothels to enforce their sex workers to get regular check ups. Most sex workers do because they are concerned for their own well-being.
There is a system of monitoring sex workers instituted by the Thai government. But let’s face it the Thai government, like any government, is totally inept in practically every aspect of bureaucracy. Monitoring sex workers is the lowest rung on the ladder.
That said, it is totally up to the massage shop to enforce a health and safety check for all their sex workers. It’s just my own firm belief that many shop owners don’t want diseased girls working for them. Think about the repercussions involved if one of their sex workers are suspected of infecting customers.
Just goes to show you how tough it is to own a sex massage shop in Bangkok. Even when there are so many things going for you in life, this is the type of business to lay down a bitch slap and keep you there.
After finding out I have hands on experience visiting every single massage happy ending massage shop in Bangkok, Gerald offered me a nice salary to help him bring new life into his parlor.
I told Gerald, the only way for this type of business to succeed is to get the prettiest girls to stand outside his shop. Not an old fat guy like me sitting inside with a thumb up his ass.
The formula of success for any brothel is very simple. Yet extremely difficult to achieve today.
Gerald knows a lot of very beautiful Thai girls that don’t claim to be prostitutes but really are. Gold diggers are just on a different level, but are prostitutes nonetheless. Beautiful Thai women that dip their toes into prostitution have more control on the type and manner of men they open their legs for.
It’s no secret poor girls from small farms make up the bulk of sex workers in Thailand. But there are many instances where Thai ladies of middle income background fall back on the world’s oldest profession.
Many women in Thai society have become mia noi which loosely translates to second wife. If they’re even more lucky their man sets them up with a small business. Once he’s tired of her or thinks she’s become too much of a hassle he abandons her.
This is something that happens too frequently in Thailand. I’ve met a lot of women inside sex massage parlors with similar stories. They were a sponsored mistress and a very small business was set up for them by their sponsor.
When the honeymoon is over they get the boot. As a result they don’t have the money, nor the know how to support themselves after their man grows tired of them.
So they fall back as sex workers to make fast cash. It is only under the most strenuous conditions that girls turn to prostitution. Some of Gerald’s top prettiest girls had their own businesses. They might’ve started out with Thai sponsors early on that helped them start that business. But once their bread winner leaves for a younger girl they are on their own.
Because they didn’t have the right mindset or know how to run a business successfully from the start. Which makes it hard to make their car payments and living expenses alone they start their path to full on prostitution.
Recruiting beautiful Thai girls is rapidly becoming more difficult today. Half decent looking girls is just as not easy. With social media apps on every working girls’ mobile phone, they can literally cut out the middle man and work on their own. Reaping 100% of the profit.
Most of the girls working in massage parlors are of a different calibre. Majority are dark skinned and thus deemed un
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