Arhivach Young Sister

Arhivach Young Sister
My son’s behaviour towards his sister and me is inappropriate
‘You may not have found porn on his computer, but that does not mean he hasn’t been exposed to it.’ Illustration: Lo Cole/The Guardian
My sister is being abused by her husband. What can I do?
Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning
© 2022 Guardian News & Media Limited or its affiliated companies. All rights reserved. (modern)
Something is clearly going on with your son, and you need to find out what, says Annalisa Barbieri
My son is 12 and on the cusp of puberty. For the last six months, his behaviour towards me and his 15-year-old sister has become over sexualised and inappropriate . This has included making lewd remarks and suggestions to her. He often grabs her, or strokes her hair or arms. He does the same to me, using language that sounds like lyrics from suggestive love songs. When going to and from the bathroom, he exposes himself and makes lewd remarks.
We’ve made it clear we don’t like it and want him to stop. He laughs and says he didn’t mean it . He rarely behaves like this in front of his father (we all live together) . He goes to an all - boys school and I haven’t had reports of this there.
I’m at the end of my tether . I want to show him, in front of his sister, that his behaviour could be classed as criminal. I’ve tried punishments that we use for other poor behaviour. Sometimes this stops him temporarily. In general, he is quite an anxious, angry and unhappy person at home. I monitor his internet access and I haven’t found evidence he watches porn or adult content. He mostly uses it for gaming.
Teenagers often test the boundaries with their parents, but it’s not usual for boys to make suggestive sexual comments to female members of the family, and less usual still that they expose themselves. This is the age they tend to become more self-conscious and inhibited – so something is clearly going on with your son and you need to find out what.
I contacted Graham Music, a psychotherapist ( childpsychotherapy.org.uk ) who has worked extensively with children and adolescents – especially troubled ones – and has written several books on the subject .
We both wondered what your husband’s reaction to your son’s behaviour was – whether or not he witnesses it himself? He needs to be more involved than he seems to be. It’s important for men to call out inappropriate behaviour in other men, and that starts in the home.
Music said that, often, if children are experiencing something they cannot deal with, they will seek to make others feel what they are feeling. It’s as if they are throwing it out there to say, “This is what I’m dealing with.” So the child who feels shame may seek to make others ashamed, the child who feels left out rejects others, and so on. “You don’t often act out so overtly unless you’ve been exposed to something that’s been overwhelming,” explains Music.
You may not have found porn or adult content on his computer, but that does not mean he hasn’t been exposed to it. It is likely he will have seen something. He could have seen or heard something via gaming; get more involved (you and your husband) in what he does online, which is best done by showing an interest rather than hectoring.
The fact he’s angry and anxious worries me further. Was he always like this? Music asks: “How did your son deal with unhappiness as a child?”
I would also talk to the school to get a better picture of what’s going on there. “Is he being bullied, and is he bullying you and his sister in turn?” asked Music. Has he recently changed schools?
Music was also interested in the dynamics of your house: “Who else lives there, what else is going on there, what are the power dynamics between you and your husband?”
There was scant information in your letter and little curiosity about why your son is doing this. The key to stopping it is to understand why he’s doing it. “It could be sexual urges,” said Music, “or it could be he’s using the sexual as a language to enact something else, like asserting power.” How do you generally deal with feelings in the family? Are they allowed or are they buried? Your son might have noticed and enjoyed getting a reaction out of you. But, again, you need to look at why he feels this compulsion.
In the meantime, his behaviour must be addressed and your daughter told she can react to protect herself. “Boundaries and authority are essential,” says Music, “But you and your husband need to set those up together. Try to stop his behaviour and then work out why it’s happening. Your son needs to understand there are consequences, but you need to make space to think about why he’s doing this.”
Every week Annalisa Barbieri addresses a family-related problem sent in by a reader. If you would like advice from Annalisa on a family matter, please send your problem to ask.annalisa@theguardian.com . Annalisa regrets she cannot enter into personal correspondence. Submissions are subject to our terms and conditions: see gu.com/letters-terms .
Comments on this piece are premoderated to ensure the discussion remains on the topics raised by the article. Please be aware that there may be a short delay in comments appearing on the site.

Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Please enter email address We will not spam you
Let's keep in touch and we'll send more your way.
Please enter email address By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. We respect your privacy. We will not publish or share your email address in any way.
Are you sure you want to post this?
We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted
Get our top 10 stories in your inbox:
We and our trusted partners use technology such as cookies on our site to personalize content and ads, provide social media features, and analyze our traffic. You can read more about it and change your preferences here .
Bored Panda iOS App Available on App Store
Bored Panda Android App Available on Google Play
By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. You can change your preferences here .
20 Shocking Photos Of Drunk Japanese By Lee Chapman Show The Ugly Side Of Drinking
Home Partnership Advertise Success stories Jobs About us Contact Home Advertise Success stories Challenges Jobs About us Contact
Ilona Baliūnaitė BoredPanda staff
Twitter Render conversation Use html version Generate not embedded version Add watermark
Instagram Show Image Only Hide Caption Crop Add watermark
Get the latest inspiring stories via our awesome iOS app! Download Bored Panda app!
To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you.
To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you.
To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you.
Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly.
Please enter your email to complete registration
Your account is not active. We have sent an email to the address you provided with an activation link. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account.
The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here .
Japan might have one of the lowest crime rates in the world, and also the highest life expectancy , but as you can see from these street photography shots of excessive alcohol consumption, that doesn't mean that the Japanese don't know how to party hard...although maybe a little too much.
The pictures were taken by Lee Chapman, a British photographer from Manchester and founder of the Tokyo Times who arrived in Tokyo in 1998 for "a year or two" and, well, never left. His revealing images shine a light on an element of life in this country that few people think about whenever they think of Japanese culture. We're used to pictures of colorful cosplayers and neon wonderlands. Still, these pictures of drunk Japanese people passed out in the streets in broad daylight or snoozing in potted plants introduce us to a different world of binge drinking entirely.
UPDATE: Although millions of people know how to drink responsibly, Bored Panda doesn't condone getting drunk and encourages everybody to enjoy themselves in moderation.
This post may include affiliate links.
So light compared to every thing we see in France everywhere and every day.
Btw, were all these people okay with being photoshot and published on the internet at their worst?
I find all this very disrespectful.
the bartender fell asleep waiting for him to go home
Don't try to drink like Lemmy used to, guys. You simply can't xD
All so organic, riding a bicycle for work, sleeping on the ground :)
Are we gonna talk about the lime green velour suit the guy has on? O-o
Chinese guard waking up his relief to go home. 555
"I fallen down and I can't get up"...
Too many Kamikaze shots I suspect. Oh btw, zip up dude.
gotta... get.... that last...dropppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He was just trying to be there for his sister when the store opened....
at least they marked the area with a cone... lol gotta new best friend
This person could well be sober and just overly tired.
Looks like some station - maybe not drunk?
Anyone can write on Bored Panda. Start writing!
Please use high-res photos without watermarks
Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB.
Ooops! Your image is too large, maximum file size is 8 MB.
Error occurred when generating embed. Please check link and try again.
Ilona is a photo editor at Bored Panda with an MA in Communication Of Creative Society. Before Bored Panda, she worked as a social media manager and freelance graphic designer. When she is not photoshopping or searching for the most interesting photos for stories, she is usually watching good movies and says that The Godfather is the best.
I fell asleep on the Toyoko line because I was drunk once and rode all the way to the end of the line. Instead of the cops arresting me, the station manager woke me up and handed me a card of a capsule hotel nearby to sleep it off till morning.
Japanese salarymen work about 12-13 hours per day and top it off with a hearty night out with their colleagues..this is an acceptable custom in Japanese society
I think this is sad... but it's true and not only in Japan... We as humans should start changing the world in a good way don't ya'll think?
At least in Japan they won't wake up to find they've been robbed or raped. However, in all the times I've been there, I've never once seen anyone passed out on the street. I'm guessing it's pretty unusual.
I lived there for nearly a decade, and this is extremely common.
LMAO that that is ever going to happen. Society / pepople are nothing more than destructive viruses
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
I fell asleep on the Toyoko line because I was drunk once and rode all the way to the end of the line. Instead of the cops arresting me, the station manager woke me up and handed me a card of a capsule hotel nearby to sleep it off till morning.
Japanese salarymen work about 12-13 hours per day and top it off with a hearty night out with their colleagues..this is an acceptable custom in Japanese society
I think this is sad... but it's true and not only in Japan... We as humans should start changing the world in a good way don't ya'll think?
At least in Japan they won't wake up to find they've been robbed or raped. However, in all the times I've been there, I've never once seen anyone passed out on the street. I'm guessing it's pretty unusual.
I lived there for nearly a decade, and this is extremely common.
LMAO that that is ever going to happen. Society / pepople are nothing more than destructive viruses
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you.

This website no longer supports Internet Explorer, which is now an outdated browser. For the best experience and your security, please visit
us using a different browser.

Social Links for Andrew Court

View Author Archive

email the author

Get author RSS feed

captions settings , opens captions settings dialog captions off , selected
Error Code: MEDIA_ERR_SRC_NOT_SUPPORTED
No compatible source was found for this media.
Session ID: 2022-10-15:4b24dda8f66552e5f2668805 Player Element ID: nyp-brightcove-player-1
Text Color White Black Red Green Blue Yellow Magenta Cyan Transparency Opaque Semi-Transparent Background Color Black White Red Green Blue Yellow Magenta Cyan Transparency Opaque Semi-Transparent Transparent Window Color Black White Red Green Blue Yellow Magenta Cyan Transparency Transparent Semi-Transparent Opaque
Font Size 50% 75% 100% 125% 150% 175% 200% 300% 400% Text Edge Style None Raised Depressed Uniform Dropshadow Font Family Proportional Sans-Serif Monospace Sans-Serif Proportional Serif Monospace Serif Casual Script Small Caps
Reset restore all settings to the default values Done

Filed under

celebrity deaths

obituaries

porn

porn stars

2/3/22

This story has been shared 217,957 times.
217,957

This story has been shared 79,468 times.
79,468

This story has been shared 72,838 times.
72,838

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

LinkedIn

Email

YouTube

Thanks for contacting us. We've received your submission.
Beginning of dialog window. Escape will cancel and close the window.
This is a modal window. This modal can be closed by pressing the Escape key or activating the close button.
This is a modal window. This modal can be closed by pressing the Escape key or activating the close button.
Holly Parker, a popular transgender porn star and OnlyFans personality, has died. She was 30.
The performer was reportedly found dead in Kokomo, Indiana, on Monday, according to close friend and fellow adult entertainer Brooke Zanell.
“It is with greatest sorrow and devastation that I her sister, inform you the world … yesterday we lost @TheHollyParker,” Zanell posted on Twitter .
A cause of death has not been confirmed — but cops are conducting an investigation, the Sun reports. When contacted by The Post, the Kokomo Police Department declined to comment on Parker’s case.
Parker starred in her first X-rated movie back in 2014, three years before undergoing gender reassignment surgery.
According to news outlet Adult Video News, the blond beauty appeared in more than 30 raunchy titles, including “Transsexual Babysitters 27” and a spoof of “The Brady Bunch” titled “The Tranny Bunch.”
Parker had not appeared in any professional films since 2018, instead moving to OnlyFans, where she shared adult content with paying subscribers.
In addition to her porn career, Parker was an aspiring singer. Disturbingly, just weeks before her death, she released a track titled “Drugs.”
The multifaceted performer shared the song to her SoundCloud account , and it featured the lyrics: “Drugs make me feel fine in the afternoon and the evening, too. They help me get through losing you.”
It continued: “Someone told me that they think I have some problems, then I took a hit and showed them how I solved them. Really wanna quit, but that’s like giving up your best friend.”
One porn director paid tribute to Parker in an interview with AVN , stating: “I met Holly years ago when she came to visit LA. We hit it off online beforehand and would chat on occasion, so it felt like meeting an old friend when we finally met in person.”
The director recalled Parker’s “vibrant energy.”
Taking to Twitter, close friend Zanell shared several photos of herself with Parker on porn sets. “The bread to my butter, my singing partner, my travel companion, my baby sister has left this earth,” she poignantly captioned the snaps.
It it with greatest sorrow and devastation that I her sister, inform you the world … yesterday we lost @TheHollyParker , My right hand man, the bread to my butter, my singing partner, my travel companion, my baby sister has left this earth omg it’s just to much for me !!! pic.twitter.com/V7Em6S0CKn
Fans also took to Twitter to share their shock, with one posting : “Damn it, this hurts and saddens me greatly.”
I’d like to take a moment to honor the life of my sister and friend Holly Parker. She was a beautiful trans woman, talented dancer, creative musician and model. Your life was not in vain, everyone you touched will always be better for knowing you. I love you sis pic.twitter.com/nJh6LrNimi
Parker will be cremated in Indiana, and Zanell has set up a fundraiser on Facebook to help transport the ashes back to her devastated mom, who resides in Washington state.
The blonde’s death comes less than a year after the untimely passing of two other adult film stars.
Last June, adult actress Kristina “Kris the Foxx” Lisina died at 29 after falling from a high-rise building . The following day, Dahlia Sky was found dead in her car from an apparent gunshot wound. She was 31.

*First Published: May 22, 2013, 12:42 pm CDT
More stories to check out before you go

Posted on May 22, 2013 Updated on Jun 1, 2021, 3:17 pm CDT

A recent undercover sting in Mobile, Ala., provides a window into the secret world of coded language pedophiles use online. And it’s shockingly simplistic.

Jurors heard opening statements yesterday in the case of Alan Preston Prine, 60, arrested last November after exchanging more than 200 emails with an undercover officer posing as a 32-year-old housewife offering up her two pre-teen kids for sex. The flurry of emails began with this message posted to the “Casual Encounters” section of Craigslist :

“P.hamily fun serious replies only bama won yes T.erday and kansas state lost don’t forget to H. elp the less fortunate this C. hristmas”

Detective James Morton, who posted the ad, was using the capital letters as a simple code: In pedophile circles, PTHC stands for “pre-teen hardcore.” The ad was an invitation, and Prine took Morton up on his offer.

Prine’s lawyer is taking the “Internet as fantasyland” defense, claiming his client was simply role-playing. “It is not just officers who pose,” he told the court. “People on the Internet pose. This case presents a world of smoke and mirrors.”

A world of smoke and mirrors that nevertheless resolves into a pretty damning scene: Police busted Prine, carrying a pizza box, as he approached the supposed 32-year-old mother’s apartment on Nov. 20. Earlier, Prine had explained in explicit detail exactly what he hoped to get out of the encounter:

“Are you into that?” Prine had written to the detective earlier. “That,” referred to
Naughty Alysha Porn Pics
Mommy Dp
Lesbian 2

Arhivach Young Sister

Report Page