Are Greek Men Good Lovers
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10 Reasons Why You Should Date a Greek Person
Folegandros, Greece | © Milan Gonda / Shutterstock
Is dating a Greek really like My Big Fat Greek Wedding portrayed it? Well, it is quite accurate, to be honest. Greeks are very social and even the smallest event calls for a celebration in the grandest way possible. Need more convincing? Here are 10 reasons why you should date a Greek person.
They will always want to show you a good time
Greeks are fun-loving, social and know how to party. So being with a Greek person means you can be sure that you will have a good time. Drinks on a Monday or on a Tuesday are not unusual and a spontaneous night out with his/her friends is never out of the question. From family reunions to dining out with your partner’s best buddies, you will quickly understand what living the Greek life is.
Dating a Greek means they will make sure you are having a good time | © Dave Lastovskiy / Unsplash
You will spend your summer vacations in Greece
Can you imagine spending your vacations in Greece? Getting to know the best spots that tourists don’t know and having your own guide? Yes, that’s possible when you are with a Greek. Of course, things need to be serious before your partner invites you to tag along, but once you have a stable relationship, you can be sure that you will get to spend summers in the family home or at least, spend some time in Greece.
Crystal clear waters in Koufonisia, Greece | © Trip & Travel Blog/flickr
You’ve arrived 10 minutes late to your date? No big deal! Greeks are pretty laid-back and don’t care about the small things. As long as you get there and are ready to have a good time, the time you arrive at has little importance.
You will always have delicious food in the fridge
Whether your partner is doing the cooking, or if his/her mom sees you off after a family dinner with a Tupperware filled with leftovers, rest assured that there will always be food on the table (or in the fridge) during those busy weekdays when you don’t have time to cook dinner.
Greek deliciousness | © Ania Mendrek / Flickr
They will always offer a helping hand
Whether their friend is sick or has a flat tire in the middle of nowhere, Greeks will do everything they can to help them. Have you ever been lost while visiting a place in Greece and had to ask a stranger for directions? Chances are, that person helped you find your way and maybe even gave you a ride. That’s how Greeks are, they love to help and will never refuse to do so.
You will be showered with affection
Greeks are a proud nation. As such, if you are dating a Greek woman and things are going great, she will be very affectionate and is most likely to show you off to her friends and family as her man. Greek men, as passionate as they are, will do the same. They will spontaneously give you compliments, tell you how beautiful you are and show their affection by taking you out and treating you like a queen.
They’re not afraid to talk about their feelings
As a Mediterranean people, Greeks love passion and are not afraid to say what they think and feel. So, they won’t be afraid to express their feelings, often with big, dramatic words and gestures (after all, they invented drama), or even dedicate songs to you. The same can be said for arguments.
If you pass the parent test, you’ll gain an entire family
For Greeks, family is sacred, so having a good relationship with them is of the utmost importance. So, when things are serious and you pass the family test (and more specifically, if the mother likes you), know that you will be treated as an integral member of the family.
Maybe it’s their southern temperament, or maybe it’s simply in their genes, but know that the stereotype that Greeks are passionate lovers is true. If you are a bit adventurous and like to keep things spicy, you are definitely off to a good start by finding yourself a Greek woman or man.
If you prefer things to be traditional, you’re in for a treat
Greek men love to be in charge so they can provide and take care of their families. They will not be against having a partner that works, as nowadays, two salaries are better than one, but they also appreciate a woman who takes care of her home and children. Likewise, Greek women, like many women, like to be taken care of and will expect their man to take charge and reach for the bill on dates.
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Greek love was love between a boy, typically adolescent, and an older adolescent or man. It is called Greek because it was most famously practised in ancient Greece, where it was called paiderastia, formed from paidos, "of a boy", and erastia, "love". Though eros, erotic longing, implicitly inspired a Greek love affair, it could remain chaste.
Greek love was not an orientation. A man who prefers boys sexually is a pederast or boy-lover, but, surprisingly, most men in history involved in Greek love affairs were attracted to women just as much. It can be proved, for example, that in Renaissance Florence at least two thirds of all males were incriminated in sodomy, which there meant consummated Greek love. This is known from the records of the Office of the Night set up to investigate it. Down to the seventeenth century, there and in other Christian countries it was simply taken for granted that men in general were attracted to boys as well as women, even if they never acted on their attraction because of the Christian prohibition of sodomy.
In many non-Christian cultures, Greek love was not merely openly practised by most, but actively encouraged by society because of its benefits to boys when ethically conducted. Like any other kind of sexual relationship, a Greek love one could of course be conducted either nobly or shamefully. We aim to present as much as possible of its whole history here, showing both the cruelties it incited in the base and the generous giving of the self it inspired in the decent. Most remarkably though, will be seen the astonishing cultural florescence that ensued when this form of love was ubiquitous and idealistically espoused.
Due to huge cultural changes in the last three centuries, and most especially in the last generation, changes to be discussed, Greek love is now practically extinct in most of the world and, in so far as it is remembered at all, thoroughly misunderstood. The aim here is, through presenting the past in its own words, to enable the reader willing to take off his 21st-century glasses to understand a lost form of love, and then to judge it objectively if he so wishes.
Since Greek love has become so little understood, there have been two sexualities with which it has become badly confused. Any individual may of course have multiple sexual likes, but that does not mean they are not distinct in character and incompatible for other individuals.
Pedophilia, despite some misuse in popular parlance, is defined by psychologists as sexual attraction to prepubescent children of either gender, currently meaning children under ten or eleven. The boys in Greek love affairs were defined by attraction to older males and not to younger children. The men are also badly misrepresented by the term pedophile for two reasons. First, they were typically involved with adolescent boys. There is, for example, no references in the whole of ancient Greek literature to sexual interest in a boy under twelve. The age of the boy in Japanese Greek love affairs usually corresponded to the age of the wakashu (adolescent boy), defined by hair-shaving ceremonies performed at the ages of eleven or twelve and eighteen or nineteen. Secondly, though men in Greek love affairs were generally at least as attracted to females, the ethos of Greek love was usually determinedly same-sex only. A disposition to Greek love equates to the combined male-only versions of what psychologists term hebephilia and ephebophilia.
Gay is a very modern term that at least in its connotations suggests androphilia or sexual attraction to men, the only form of male homosexuality permitted in most countries today. Almost all men in the cultures best-known for widespread practice of Greek love expressed profound distaste for sex with other men, as did the boys once they were men. The Florentine records, for example indicate that 80% of all the passive partners incriminated for sodomy were under eighteen and 97.4% were under twenty-one. Both the boys and the men involved usually married and had families without sense of conflict or known lack of enthusiasm for so doing. Surely it is absurd to think of men who were attracted to women and not to other men as gay? Moreover, in both ethos and sexual practise, Greek love affairs were asymmetrical and much closer to traditional marriage than to typically egalitarian gay relationships.
Everything on this website is freely available to all. No advertising is accepted. No donations are solicited. The editors and contributors devote their time out of a desire to increase understanding of the subject, and with no reward except fulfillment of that desire. They do not endorse all the ideas expressed, which are intended to encompass the rich diversity to be found in history and literature. Questions as to how Greek love is or should be handled today are beyond the website's remit.
Interesting. This is in line with a Scientific American article showing the strong liklihood that all human male primates were originally bisexual (and women too for that matter), as is in accord with the bisexuality of our two closest primate relatives (chimps and bonobos). That natural impulse from birth onwards was then reinforced by the natural sex play games of all children, that had originally proceeded indiscriminate of gender in the original foraging cultures (because there was simply no sense of impropriety regarding affectionate sexual touches of any kind).
Dale Bach, do you have a reference for that article?
I'm not at home right now, but I got the article in my computer in PDF form. Send me your email address and I'll send the PDF to you. Mine is ekimiheart@gmail.com
Dale
Btw, some of the statements I made came from my own research, especially regarding sex play in human children. I'm an evolutionary psychologist, and my 200pg thesis paper was wholly on that subject.
As I see it, it the craftsman & apprentice scenario
you have created a most wonderful site, thank you so much
the only moral and righteous way one can experience a young boy is to find an older teen;who looks much younger, my last little friend was 17 , with no hair on either his face or under his arms ,just a bit on his calves ,as for actual pubertal progress- in more private areas he was no more than 1yr into puberty . sadly nature took its coarse and he is know fully grown with a beard though we remain friends I always was honest with him that our relationship would be fleeting. I do think having a relationship with an actual 11 to13 yr old boy would be wrong, I don,t think emotionally such a young lad is up to having such an intense relationship in secret also without always realising it the older man will dominate and manipulate this young mind . for possibly the most beautifull boy on film check out Julien ciamaca 11yrs old in la Gloria de mon pere. available on dvd gaumont films also on you tube pay per view includes nudity
Mr. Smith, what you have described is simply how you personally have satisfied your lust. No doubt it was harmless, but what was its cultural or social purpose? It is in having one that loving a boy of 13 often had a "moral and righteous way" absent from what you describe. A love affair could surely bring about something much more positive than mere pleasure or the avoidance of harm.
why do you assume it was just lust and avoidance of harm , for sure when I fist saw , and had physical contact with this boy it was very much lust , I was 28yrs old and had not experienced a young looking boy or any boy for that matter since schooldays , however, we lived in the same probation hostel , and within days of meeting shared the same 2 man room , I did fall in love with him and who he was , through me he got to know about modern history and music , both of which he enjoys today , and although he knows I do not find grown men attractive. and im sure that's mutual as I am now 48 , however I still love him very much and I believe with good reason he loves me..
re reading my comments that actual physical relationships with boys of 13 to be wrong I fear that I sound a self righteous asshole also I have not given credit for the times of which I have no doubt boys this young have benefited from such a set up , I would have to question though that if the boy was not gay or at the very least going through a phase what would be in it for him? education?, culture? , any man worth his salt who loves knowledge would surely want to give these things unconditionally. if the boy concerned also benefited from the relationship because of lack of a father figure , then if the boy is clearly hetro , then be just that, a loving father figure. a hetro young lad should not have to whip it out , to benefit from the paternal feelings of an older male or to experience culture , as for a young lad who has sexual feelings for grown men and would definitely enjoy physical that is sexual contact , and not just say he does so as not to loose his new friend , men men should make double sure that this really is what the lad wants
in regard to dales comments on evolution , I know a fair bit about chimps, male bonding in chimp society is massively important, males will spend huge amounts of their time grooming other males not only for genuine , goodwill , love , warmth and security but also to build political alliances , the amount of time males spend grooming females is much, much less . some of what we regard as are most human traits , compassion , love , empathy are in fact traits we have in common with our distant relatives. as a youth and young man I was a drug addict and petty criminal instead of college and uni it was juvenile detention and prison so I missed out big time on higher learning , if I had gone to uni I would so much have liked to have studied something similar to dale , I consider myself an atheist fundamentalist therefore comments like the one from dale are interesting to me
Mr. Smith, I interpreted, perhaps wrongly, your "experience a young boy" as meaning to have sex with one, and, as you say yourself, it was very much lust at first. I think it's great that a loving friendship was born out of it, and I stand corrected in not having realised that. So congratulations. My real point was and is that love affairs between men and boys at or near pubescence, wherever these were socially allowed, were fulfilling an evolutionary function by bringing men’s protection, love and attention to boys at the age they could most benefit from them. 17 is getting late for that. The issue of a boy’s supposed sexual orientation is almost exclusively very modern and appears irrelevant in societies like ancient Greece and mediaeval to early modern Japan where pretty much every boy seems to have had an older male lover and was believed to benefit strongly from it, but later went on to marry. Sexuality was much more fluid when it was allowed to be. As for why in practice the most effective man/boy mentoring relationships tended to be or become sexual, it is because “the mortal gives of his best when loving” (Hölderin).
philhellene, your initial comments are very kind and leave me feeling better, though you might of had a point , as my comments about my friend made him into a nice piece of meat rather than the loyal, good natured ,loving though poorly educated boy he was, bare in mind I was no artist or writer or even academic of any sort, just a petty criminal who liked to learn, I could of paid better tribute to him, for he saw things in me very early on which others definitely did not. as for the other thoughts I agree that the boy would not definitely have to be gay to benefit from this kind of relationship , and sexual activity could take place with a modern hetro boy , or ancient less label restricted boy , but in both cases much care would have to be taken to first find out what does and what does not disgust the boy. for the boy concerned the decisions he makes in regard to intergenerational relastionships are going to affect him for the rest of his life, for in the world of boys and men boys and men together that is, not everything is as it seems,even when a smart kid who has his wits about him makes a decision it can be a real lottery as to the real integrity of the older male , when I was a boy up to no good with local grown men , there was one black bearded, large gentleman with a nautical air about him whose very appearance,voice and manner frightened me so much that I had to take a dump, this tanned, scarred and tattooed individual turned out to be the one who truly loved me with a passion , and with me at 10ys old and him in his late 30s we became definite lovers, though his integrity never allowed to him to touch my genitalia , the youngest, best dressed , best looking , best smelling man who loved the same bands as me turned out to be an absolute monster , who very nearly killed me.
having said all this there are so many lonely boys and so many lonely men that it breaks my heart that their isn't a way they can come together more frequently without the frowns of onlookers .regards mr smith
To understand what Greek love truly was. One would need to go back in time and live it the way it was. Or one could study the man boy relationships of today… However the bulk of modern society has already been programed beyond repair by their masters. They will never accept it. Man Boy love does not always mean there is anal penetration. Most of what goes on between a man and a young boy is fondling of the boy, or the man performs fellatio. The man in such a situation is often concerned about the boy’s health, happiness, and his masculine growth. I think modern Christians should read the Bible a bit deeper. I have taken some time to study and what surprised me is that there is no mention of pedophilia, pederasty, or oral copulation of minors anywhere. The two Greek words were in use at the time the New Testament was being written and history tells us the acts were commonly known and performed. The only reference that I can find is in Leviticus 18:22 “Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind”. That scripture was specifically written to the Hebrews and not to the Greeks. It also indicates that a grown adult man shall not anal penetrate another grown adult man, yet it is ok for him to anal penetrate a grown adult woman. It says nothing about a “boy” The Bible was written in Hebrew and Greek, not English. I will not get into a debate over this issue, so please do not reply back if you just want to argue. This Greek love site contains forgotten history and I think there is much that can be beneficially added.
There is so much here to digest, I am taken aback.
Interestingly, many comments reflect the spirit of the age--we close our minds to issues that are not politically and socially acceptable. We accept the rewriting of history without thinking.
The curious thing (to me) is the social and cultural advances of the Ancient Greeks came about because of critical thinking, not accepting the status quo, and reaching out for superior 'modes' of understanding, whether for love or political systems. This approach of querying the norm in inspiring ways is also the essence of creative thinking.
When you realize that Christianity has formed most w
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