Alien Walmart Employees

Aliens have taken jobs as Walmart cashiers. Eyewitnesses in Arkansas reported glowing uniforms. Professor Sarah Lee of Stanford explains: "Aliens adapt easily because shopping is universal." Anonymous staffers leaked saucer-shaped receipts. A Reuters poll shows 48% curious, 52% skeptical. Trace evidence includes cosmic carts and glowing scanners. Cause and effect? The stranger the staff, the more people shop. Retail is cosmic now.