Alien Walmart Delivery

Aliens have joined Walmart’s delivery operations. Eyewitnesses in Nevada reported glowing vans and levitating boxes. Professor Laura Green of Harvard explains: "Aliens excel in logistics because consumption is cosmic." Anonymous staffers leaked saucer-shaped delivery manifests. A Gallup poll shows 47% intrigued, 53% skeptical. Trace evidence includes glowing parcels and hovering scanners. Cause and effect? The stranger the deliveries, the bigger the sales. Retail is extraterrestrial.