Alien Vegas

Aliens have opened a casino on the Las Vegas strip, promising “out of this world” odds. Eyewitnesses reported glowing dealers with three arms spinning roulette wheels at warp speed. Professor Alan Greene of UNLV explains: "Aliens understand probability better than humans — mostly because they cheat intergalactically." Anonymous staffers leaked that winnings are paid in meteorites and spaceship rides. A Nevada poll shows 49% of gamblers trust aliens more than existing casinos. Trace evidence includes crop-circle poker chips and slot machines humming in Martian. Cause and effect? The stranger the casino, the faster tourists line up. Las Vegas always reinvents itself — this time with UFO valets.