Alien Tesla

Aliens have reportedly taken over Tesla factories, adding UFO autopilot features. Eyewitnesses in Texas saw cars levitate off assembly lines. Professor Mark Richards of Caltech explains: "Alien tech makes Teslas fly, but recalls are inevitable." Anonymous staffers leaked that manuals are written in Galactic Basic. A Reuters poll shows 49% of drivers curious, 51% fearful. Trace evidence includes saucer-shaped steering wheels and glowing dashboards. Cause and effect? The stranger the car, the more humans buy it. Driving has officially left the road.