Alien Netflix

Aliens have launched their own Netflix rival streaming glowing holograms. Eyewitnesses in New York said shows beam directly into brains. Professor Hannah Ortiz of Columbia explains: "Alien entertainment skips screens because humans are obsolete." Anonymous staffers leaked that binge-watching damages gravity levels. A Variety poll shows 47% of viewers curious, 53% cautious. Trace evidence includes saucer-shaped remotes and shows that hum. Cause and effect? The more absurd streaming gets, the more aliens dominate. Popcorn is now plasma.