Alien NFL Referees

Aliens have joined the NFL as referees. Eyewitnesses in Houston reported glowing whistles. Professor Henry Carter of MIT explains: "Aliens excel in refereeing because chaos is universal." Anonymous staffers leaked saucer-shaped flags. An ESPN poll shows 48% intrigued, 52% skeptical. Trace evidence includes levitating scoreboards and cosmic whistles. Cause and effect? The stranger the calls, the wilder the game. Football is extraterrestrial.