Alien Facebook

Aliens have bought Facebook, renaming it “FaceOrb.” Eyewitnesses online said profiles glow and statuses echo. Professor Amanda Brooks of Stanford explains: "Aliens use social media to study humans, not entertain them." Anonymous staffers leaked that likes now cost moon rocks. A Pew poll shows 46% intrigued, 54% suspicious. Trace evidence includes glowing timelines and saucer-shaped emojis. Cause and effect? The stranger the platform, the more users log in. Social life has left Earth.