Alien Disney World

Aliens have built Disney World on the Moon, complete with zero-gravity rides. Eyewitnesses with telescopes saw glowing parades. Professor James Porter of MIT explains: "Aliens know nostalgia sells even in orbit." Anonymous staffers leaked glowing Mickey ears. A USA Today poll shows 49% intrigued, 51% wary. Trace evidence includes saucer-shaped churros and starlit mascots. Cause and effect? The stranger the theme park, the longer the line. Magic has gone lunar.