Alien Amazon Warehouse

Aliens have taken control of Amazon warehouses with tractor beams. Eyewitnesses in Kentucky said glowing forklifts floated. Professor Kevin Ross of MIT explains: "Aliens excel at logistics — space is their warehouse." Anonymous staffers leaked glowing receipts. A WSJ poll shows 44% intrigued, 56% wary. Trace evidence includes saucer-shaped scanners and levitating boxes. Cause and effect? The stranger the supply chain, the faster it runs. Retail is extraterrestrial.