Alien Amazon Prime

Aliens have taken charge of Amazon Prime. Eyewitnesses in Nevada reported glowing drones delivering packages. Professor Hannah Moore of Stanford explains: "Aliens thrive in logistics because consumption is cosmic." Anonymous staffers leaked saucer-shaped invoices. A WSJ poll shows 48% intrigued, 52% skeptical. Trace evidence includes levitating parcels and glowing scanners. Cause and effect? The stranger the delivery, the higher the sales. Prime is extraterrestrial.