Aella Gnomes

Aella Gnomes

Posted on January 28, 2015 by Roxy

Posted on January 21, 2014 by Roxy

Posted on November 1, 2013 by Roxy

Posted on October 11, 2013 by Roxy
I like to compare myself to Smurfette. I’m surrounded by dude gnomes 24/7, so how could I not be a total slut?
Hey gnome fans, Roxy here. I just celebrated a birthday and have been doing some serious soul searching since then. I used to blog in the category, Secrets of a Slutty Girl Gnome,” but now I’m starting to second guess my life’s purpose.
The tips aren’t that good anymore anyway.
Instead of slutting, I’ve turned to crafting. Somebody once said something about idle hands being the devil’s playthings. So in the spirit of playing instead of “playing,” here is the story of my first craft project…
In my regular following of “gnome news,” I came across an intriguing craft that I’d never heard of before. The craft is called “felting,” and this was the article: Felted Gnome Products on WCAX.com .
Felted gnome products? Whaaaaaaaaaaa?
I immediately began typing away on this Internet machine to pull up Susi Ryan’s Etsy shop, The Felted Gnome Knows . Felting, felting, WHAT THE HECK IS FELTING?!
According to Susi , “Needle Felting is a unique art. It is not an old technique, it started in the 1980s when some artists found that by using a machine felting needle they could shape wool by stabbing it . It takes many stabs, hours and bleeding fingers to sculpt wool but the results as you can see are terrific. There is something magical about wool felt creatures and paintings. It emanates warmth, strength and evokes a time when play was innocent.”
Welp, that’s enough for me! After a bit of browsing, I settled on purchasing Susi’s Felted Gnome Making Kit . A gnome making kit…just THINK of the possibilities!
What the heck am I supposed to do with all this?!
A cute box full of supplies arrived promptly in the mail. I must admit that I was a teensy bit intimidated.
I settled in on the coffee table in the sunlight and opened up the instruction manual. Take a look at that white blog stuck with a needle onto a sponge-like thing. This is how it all began…
In an effort to bring more diversity to The Gnome Abode, I decided to create a brown gnome to join our clan. A rich hot sexy chocolate brown gnome. Mmmm…
You’d think those green things are arms but they’re actually legs…GOTCHA
In practically no time at all, I had totally gotten the hang of felting. Basically, all you do is stab fuzzy stuff with a needle onto a sponge until it makes a certain shape. It’s a bit like sculpting, but involves adding more “stuff” on rather than whittling it away.
So in the end, this is how my first felting project turned out! Not only did I keep my hands busy and successfully complete my first anti-slut craft, but I also have a new boyfriend.
Finished product = my new boyfriend
P.S. – Have you tried felting? Share your tips or questions with me so I feel like I’m an integral part of the felting community…to cure my sluttiness once and for all…PLEASE!
I don’t know about the rest of you gnomes, but I’ve gone through my fair share of heartbreaks breakups over the years.
This means that I’ve been stuck with a house full of painful reminders of love lost – jewelry, photo albums, teddy bears, and (gasp) even underwear. Well apparently now, there’s a place for all these unwanted and unloved things.
The Museum of Broken Relationships is the creation of Croatian ex-lovers Olinka Vištica and Dražen Grubišić. This travelling exhibition will open on 28th June at the Southbank Centre in London and run until August 31st.
And apparently, this sorry excuse for a garden gnome is among the museum’s exhibits:
Mannequin hands, dreadlocks, and an ax are also on display. What a marvelous idea!
So what’s driving you crazy to look at and provide constant reminders about “what might have been?” I’m starting up a collection to send over to London this weekend, so hit me up!
Gnome news generally revolves around gnomes getting stolen or celebrities painting gnomes for charity. However, yesterday we came across some gnome news that REALLY took us by surprise.
She goes by the name Aella, and she poses nude for Internet. Okay, nothing really all that shocking there.
But here’s the twist….she poses NUDE WITH GNOMES.
Web forum, Reddit, has a subgroup called “gw” with plenty of ladies looking to strut their stuff for strangers. To stand out from the crowd, Aella’s gimmick is to pose nude while being ASSAULTED* by evil garden gnomes.
* Disclaimer – gnome assault is an unfounded myth. No actual gnome assaults have been reported in the history of gnomekind.
Viewers fell in love with her gnome gimmick and she was actually the forum’s most popular naked woman in 2013. The forum has over 500,000 members.
“People are so used to watching girls take themselves seriously when it comes to sexuality,” she told The Daily Dot . “I don’t care about looking pretty. I care about making people laugh. People need to realize you’re a human being.”
According to Inquisitr , she grew up in a super-Christian household, and this appears to be a really unique form of rebellion. And apparently, she makes more money doing this than if she went to college and worked a regular job for 10 years.
Are you intrigued? Because we certainly are! We just started stalking her on Twitter , so this should be interesting…
Most of us are just waking up now from our Halloween outings, and most of us are still in costumes. There are few more entertaining sights in the world than a bunch of gnomes doing walks of shame in torn and stained costumes.
Here’s just a sampling of what I found on my camera when I woke up this afternoon:
What’s that, Humps…what? Today is another holiday? It’s the Day of the Dead! OMG why are we not throwing a party yet. Somebody! Get me some skeletons!
Your last minute party planner,
Roxy the Gnome
Perhaps you think all we gnomes drink is beer. Then perhaps you’d be mistaken. Some of us lady gnomes consume a steady diet of wine each day…it helps restore balance to our skin tones.
Like many lady gnomes, I’m a sucker for pretty labels. While buying ingredients to make my boyfriend a pumpkin pie, I came across this bright orange bottle. (That’s my bf in the picture. He’s a firegnome. How HOTTT is that?!)
I know it’s only the 11th of October, but I’m getting super excited for Halloween. And how freaking festive is this bottle of deliciousness?!
“Halloween” is made by a local place called Illinois River Winery in Utica, IL. It’s right near Starved Rock state park….I love that place!
Anyway this is an apple and pumpkin wine that’s spiced with cinnamon and nutmeg. And it tasted like exactly that. After my man and I devoured the bottle in a couple swift sips, I noticed a suggestion that it’s best served warm.
Whoops! Guess I’d better pick up another bottle to try it heated up a bit!
Halloween wine is 10.5% alcohol, so it got me feeling all warm and fuzzy inside without the old-age headache the next day. It’s more sweet than tart and more fruity than dry.
I recommend it! And I’ve also added this winery to my list of places to drink at. It has a tasting room open every day – $3 for 6 tastes!
So my fellow gnomies, what fall festive drinks do YOU plan to throw back this weekend?
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Yesterday, during the NFL playoffs, I posed a question to my roommates "who do you think isn't watching the NFL playoffs right now?" We hypothesized the type of person who wasn't and in phenomenal timing this tweet popped up on my timeline:
An absolutely WILD take to throw out there in the middle of conference championship Sunday.
I'm no expert in this field, but I'm going to say anti-bestiality is one of the things society has gotten right overtime.
I had no idea who Aella was, but once I pressed on her bio everything began to make sense:
But after searching her on google, I became a bit more confused….Aella is a "top-earning camgirl."
Never in my life would I think I would stumble upon a top-earning camgirl who is out here questioning the position of bestiality in our society. She has a pretty wild upbringing. From her Reddit AMA:
SOURCE - I started off homeschooled, devout, and isolated from the outside world in a professionally evangelical religious family, where I was really into stuff like "protesting abortion clinics" and "a 6000 year old earth" and "feeling superior because I avoided Harry Potter".
Then, in a radical act that surprised no one, I left the faith and spent five years being a camgirl and nude mime on Myfreecams and Chaturbate for five years.
I also had the #1 post on GoneWild for a few years, where I got abducted by gnomes, and then in the years following proceeded to get sent every gnome joke known to humanity.
Then I did high doses of LSD ~once a week for ten months until I almost died. If this story strikes a chord of longing in you, I've made a Discord server which will have an overactive banhammer for the first week.
I just shot a documentary where I did 250ug LSD on camera and shrieked a lot. It's gonna be out next month, and it's by the people who did Oxyana, Florida Man, American Juggalo, and a few other awesome things. If you wanna see it when it comes out, they have a mailing list where they update people on new work. I'll also be posting about it through Twitter, Instagram, and Tumblr.
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To all the new readers who discovered the comic at either convention, welcome! I hope you enjoy it.
In other news, only one last trip this summer and then back to regular comic updates in August. Trying to finish a few up before I head out of town again.
To all the new readers who discovered the comic at either convention, welcome! I hope you enjoy it.
In other news, only one last trip this summer and then back to regular comic updates in August. Trying to finish a few up before I head out of town again.
To all the new readers who discovered the comic at either convention, welcome! I hope you enjoy it.
In other news, only one last trip this summer and then back to regular comic updates in August. Trying to finish a few up before I head out of town again.

Kidnapped by Gnomes is copyright 2006-2021 Katherine Peterson

Kidnapped by Gnomes is copyright 2006-2021 Katherine Peterson

Kidnapped by Gnomes is copyright 2006-2021 Katherine Peterson

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A naked woman on the popular internet forum Reddit is not such an unusual thing to see. The site has an entire sub-group known as "gw," which is short for "gone wild," a title inspired it would seem by the notorious Girls Gone Wild video series. The gw forum features naked woman after naked woman who has uploaded pictures of herself.
But one naked woman out of this lot stood out last year. The woman calls herself Aella and her gimmick is to pose nude while being assaulted by evil lawn gnomes.
We can't link to the pictures here, because they are, needless to say, NSFW. Interviewed by The Daily Dot , Aella said that she is contunually searching for new, outrageous ways to make posing nude online interesting. her first attempt was to do it in mime makeup.
"I actually just got really drunk one night, looked over, and saw a tube of white face paint (from Halloween), and figured I should put it on my face," the Portland, Oregon, woman said, quoted on the Uproxx web site. "And then, next thing you know, I'm trapped in invisible boxes and humping chairs."
Her mime-as-naked-woman gimmick proved bot only popular, but a moneymaker. On various internet sites where people go to see naked women, she was able to charge viewers hefty sums for the privilege of viewing her act.
Eventually, she says, she was making bigger paychecks , than if she "had gone to college and had worked at a regular job after that for 10 years."
Posing as a naked woman on the internet is likely an act of rebellion for Aella, who says she was raised as a fundamentalist Christian by a father whom she now describes as "unhealthy" and "judgmental."
"I memorized nearly a thousand Bible verses during this time," she says of her upbringing. "I didn't know anyone who wasn't Christian."
After she grew tired of the mime act, she got the idea that lawn gnomes would make interesting photo companions. She created a series of shots in which the gnomes attack and ravage her. The sequence was an instant Reddit sensation and made her the gw forum's most popular naked woman in 2013.
No small feat when you consider that the forum has over 500,000 members.
"People are so used to watching girls take themselves seriously when it comes to sexuality," she told The Daily Dot . "I don't care about looking pretty. I care about making people laugh. People need to realize you're a human being."
Aella, pictured above, also has an active Twitter account on which she posts more pictures of herself, not all of them as a naked woman, some surpisingly as a fully or at least mostly clothed woman.

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