Advantages And Disadvantages Of Teenage Dating

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There is a lot of pressure put on high school teenagers, and being involved in a romantic relationship can be one of them. Many teens, as they grow and mature in high school, feel obligated to find themselves a significant other, whether it’s the influence of society, social media, friends, or family. Ms. Anjelica Viso, the Student Assistance Counselor (SAC) at Manville High school, shared some valuable information about the truth behind high school teen relationships. From a students’ perspective, David Nieves (grade 10), who is involved in a romantic relationship, openly spoke about his relationship and shared his thoughts on this topic. 
Should high school teen relationships be encouraged? Beginning with a student’s point of view, David Nieves voiced his opinion, “…it [helps] teens to be emotionally ready to have a long time partner [and] allows them to be exposed to the real world. It provides great benefits. My work ethic and happiness has improved tremendously because I have the best person by my side.” Ms. Anjelica Viso’s states, “…give it a chance and see how it goes. It’s time to learn and find ourselves, so if relationships help us figure it out, then go for it,” expressing similar ideas to Davids’. 
So, if high school teen relationships should be encouraged, that must mean they’re beneficial, right? High school teen relationships can be beneficial, but they come with a few risks as well. Continuing his statement on of encouraging high school teen relationships, David confirms that teen relationships are beneficial to students in many ways such as, “[improved] work ethic, motivation to do well in school, and overall happiness…” He does add, however, that a teen should be careful with their choice of who to be involved with romantically, because, “Being in a relationship with the wrong kind of person, with sinister intentions, can be very damaging…” Ms. Viso stated that high school relationships, “Give teens exposure to the dating world.” She also explained that it can help students figure out more about themselves, such as gender identity and sexuality, and what constitutes a healthy and unhealthy relationship. However, according to Ms, Viso, high school teen relationships can be just as harmful as they are beneficial. “Teens feel as though they need to spend all their time together, text all day long, and cut ties with everyone except their significant other.” Along with this, she explained that students should not let their relationships take away from “me” time or cause them to lose sight of themselves. 
Unfortunately, despite all of the good that can come from them, high school teen relationships can be distracting especially, according to David, “If all they focus on is their partner.” Ms. Viso encourages teens in high school who are in relationships to set boundaries, such as cutting back on how much time spent together. She puts emphasis on the importance of focusing on academics in high school in order to prepare for college and says that being involved in an extracurricular activity can help teens manage their time. In some aspects, high school relationships can pose dangerous threats to teens, especially with other individuals being involved in drugs, alcohol, and other bad behaviors. 
Society and platforms such as social media, TV, and even the songs we listen to can have an effect on the thoughts of teen relationships. Ms. Viso explained that, “…society instills in teens that you HAVE to be dating or you don’t fit the societal norm of a high school student. What we see on TV and social media is not always accurate.” When involved in a teenage relationship, it is important to pay attention to the actions of your significant other and decide whether or not you wish to be involved with someone of that behavior. 
Along with feeling pressured to be in a relationship, teens in high school often feel that they should explore the sexual side of their lives. Many teenagers feel that, especially when surrounded by older teens in a high school environment, they should engage in sexual activities just because their friends are doing it. In reality, young teens are missing the understanding and maturity levels compared to the older students. If teens are being pressured by their friends or even their significant other, they should immediately address the situation, even if that means breaking up with them, as soon as possible. 
A huge topic, or concern, with high school teen relationships is the debate of whether or not it’s a good idea for young or upcoming highschool students to be romantically involved with an upperclassman. Ms. Viso advises that it should be up to the teens to figure out if it’s a good idea or not. She says, “It depends on the person.” Sometimes, the maturity level can be the make or break factor, while other times, it’s the work load and stresses of both teens. She explained that from her own findings and research, “…once they graduate, the relationship crumbles or is very difficult to maintain.” Young teens should be focusing on their high school decisions and school work, and sometimes being surrounded by older teens nearing adulthood, isn’t healthy. 
Overall, while there are many pros that come with being involved in a teen relationship, there are a few cons to consider before trying one out. If you, or someone you know wants more information on high school teen relationships, feel free to stop in and see Ms. Anjelica Viso, the Student Assistance Counselor. It’s always important to make good decisions before trying out a high school teen relationship!
“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” -Oscar Wilde

Kayla Knape is a staff writer for the Manville High School...
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Pros and Cons of High School Teen Relationships

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Some of our readers are dead against teens dating, while others think that it just cannot be prohibited because parents want to. Hence, they suggest that teens should be told about the consequences and dangers of risky behaviour while on dates. They opine parents should handle teens and their relationships with much care, understanding and openness
We’ve all experienced love during our teenage years. We’ve loved and been loved. This love adds richness and happiness to our lives. It makes us feel important, understood and secure. It provides us with a chance to discover our own-selves as we share it with someone new. We also learn things — to love ourselves, things we’d like to change and about the qualities and values we look for in a partner. Love and romance teach us self-respect as well as to respect others. Therefore, teen romance should not be discouraged but we have to draw some lines.
I strongly believe that teens should be discouraged from a romantic relationship. The only rational thing that they ought to do is to focus on their career and make their life meaningful by pursuing the purpose for which they were sent here on Earth. Each of us has a specific purpose and power of making our dreams come true lies within.
However, we can see many youth indulging in romantic relationship where breakups, matchups are common. The teens have the false belief that they’ll get most happiness if they’ll be able to marry his/her girlfriend/boyfriend. But the fact is that they’re just trapped in a vicious circle. A girl commits suicide just because she couldn’t marry the guy she wanted, while that guy for sure will fall in love with another girl again. So, sacrificing a beautiful life just for a romantic relationship is a blunder. Instead, they should focus on their career, how they can perform their best in everything they do.
I’m not against true love. However, being in a romantic relationship at such a young age is not rational.
Being in love is not a bad thing. It’s just that teenage is not the right age to fall in love. Teenagers should not be allowed to date as there are more disadvantages in teenage love relationship than advantages. I have seen many teenagers blindly fall in love and then face the consequences later. Most teenagers don’t act sensibly as they are immature and don’t have knowledge of right and wrong. This sometimes leads to wrong activities and decisions.
So, parents have to act more responsibly when their children reach teenage. They should keep an eye on their children’s activities. If their children are found to be in a secret relationship, they should have a talk with them and show them the right path. Parents should motivate children to focus more on their future than on love relationships. Teenagers themselves should try to control their emotions and thoughts for love relationship as far as possible.
— Aishwarya Rai, Golfutar, Kathmandu
Teen romance is common especially these days. I think it is all right if it is within boundaries. They should be allowed to date so that they get to know everything better. If everything is in limits, I don’t think there should be any discouragement. The world is changing, so we all have to change our thoughts with the changing scenario.
The majority of teenagers experience attraction, get close and establish relationship with him/her. We cannot solely blame the age or time for how they feel. It is obvious parents don’t want their children to be engaged in all these things. But this is the age when teenagers don’t think like their well-wishers do. Nowadays, we teenagers are surrounded by television, movies, social media et cetera which I believe are causes for these problems. Moreover, parents must be aware about their children. They should encourage their children for creative response while providing enough time to them. Children can be handled if they are suggested with love and care. In addition, children shouldn’t be pressurised because of their mistakes but they should be counselled about consequences of irresponsible acts. In fact, children seek more care and affection in this age. So, parents should play a leading role.
Today’s young generation and teenagers think that being in a romantic relationship is the modern way of lifestyle. They get involved in romance but belief of many Nepali guardians are rooted in old culture. So, they refrain their child from being in a relationship. They think about their dignity and honour in society and think their child is too young to be in love. They are also afraid of their child being involving in activities like sex.
Teenagers should maintain friendly relationships, but not romantic. Of course they can date so they will be good friends and can choose a good life partner when they are capable of in the future gaining experience of good and bad relation. But parents should also know about their child’s friendship and relationship to check unexpected physical relations or sexual violence.
Teenage dating and their relationship should not be discouraged but sexual attraction must be discouraged. Parents should handle it in a friendly manner. They should trust their children so they will feel good and their son/daughter maintains friendly relation with him/her and not physical relation before the right age.
It is the parents’ duty to guide their children on the right path. As I sincerely stick to our customs, I won’t advise the young generation to date prior to completion of their studies. This is not our way.
Having a life partner is a psychological need, but waiting for the right time is what makes everything perfect. In addition, opting to date instead of studies will mislead one from the journey of life. Student’s first priority ought to be their studies, not romance. This doesn’t mean students mustn’t enjoy but it should be done at the right time. This is why parents fear when their children date neglecting their money invested on their studies.
There is more to love and romance. Relationship is not easy and one can experience emotional turmoil forcing him/her to commit suicide sometimes. So, one should not take a hasty step to start a relationship. Of course teens get curious about romance because they watch romantic movies, read romantic novels so on. So, the best way to handle teen romance is by keeping them engaged. In a nutshell, studies come first over such a relationship.
Teenage is an age of fantasy. A teenager wants to see him/herself at the top of everything, wishes to get anything s/he desires. They want to be like a movie star or a great rock star. Being in a romantic relationship is one of the things which most teenagers desire to be in. Teenage is also the most crucial age where people should take rational decisions in term of their career or right choices to achieve their dreams. Relationships might hinder them from achieving the dreams. So, relationship is a thing to be avoided at teenage.
But the world is different to a teenager. If they really want to be in a romantic relationship they should look at its consequences too. Physical relationship, lack of concentration, blackmails from romantic relationship are a great hindrance. We all are rational enough to look at the pros and cons of a relationship. If being in a relationship matters to a teenager, elders probably should be informed and limits must be set!
Teenage is the age of romance. At this adolescence period, one is naturally attracted to the opposite sex. Moreover, media like TV, Internet, films add to it and ready teenagers for romance and dating. In the Nepali society, there is generation gap. Elders ignore physical growth of their teenage children and its changes as well as needs. Many parents are not aware about this fact. Meanwhile, most teachers, parents and elders who know these realities are enslaved to their past traditions and want to impose the same restrictions on their children. Ignoring the changes and realities of time have given many sorrowful episodes of suicides, accidents, fights and and so on. However, teenagers today are far ahead of the limitation of romance and dating. They know fruitful romance and dating. Therefore, fruitful romance and friendly dates should not be discouraged.
— Nanda Kumar Bhandari, Koteshwor, Kathmandu
Free mixing of girls and boys is certainly not in keeping with our culture. Even a couple of decades ago, girls and boys had separate gangs. But, thanks to commercial films and lewd advertising campaigns titillating the sexuality of teenagers, free mixing of boys and girls has become the ‘in-thing’, throwing all norms of precautions and morality to the wind. Now teenagers are not only unhesitatingly sleeping with their partners, many are just having sex with friends or acquaintances for mere fun! By engaging in such ‘bold’ acts, they might be regarding themselves as harbingers of ‘modernity’ and ‘liberalism’, but in reality they are ruining their lives and upsetting the equilibrium of society. The disease of cervical cancer and AIDS are on a rise, thereby breaking the backbone of society. Innumerable girls are committing suicide after being subjected to blackmails by ‘lovers’ who have clicked sexual acts on cell phones.
It is high time guardians and teachers convince the teen-agers to concentrate more on studies and career for their bright future. There will be ample time for romance and date in later stages of life.
For many, teenage is the most distracting stage of their life. Many lives of teens are permanently changed and subjected to greater responsibilities of a family, having children at tender age while studies become more difficult to pursue and frustrations. That can happen because of a small mistake of dating. However, dating is not a dreadful activity as many think so. It is certainly a sensitive stage activity which can twist the path of life. Therefore, teens must be adequately educated to understand the real meaning and purpose of dating. When one does it with a clear understanding about what dating is for, it can render confidence on parents about their children’s decision for a meaningful life.
Dating can easily change teenagers’ life instantly and their path in life may change. How do you think one can handle it? It is actually neither very simple nor extraordinarily difficult. It is a matter of information and knowledge about the consequences of their activities. When they are aware about what to do at this stage, they can handle it quite easily. One cannot completely stop dating in teens. This is tough work for parents and schools. Therefore, making them aware and educating them about possible consequences of dating may help. Also, teens must be helped to understand the safe way of dating so that their future is not obscured due to some irresponsible situations.
— Anish Bhattarai, Santinagar, Kathmandu
No, teenagers should not be allowed to date because the teenage is the important age to build his/her life. At this age, one can fall in love or go on dates. But s/he should to control his/her emotion as much as s/he can. As one of the most important stages in life, one has to prepare oneself for future life.
— Sonu Kumar Shah, Balkumari, Lalitpur
We live in an age where the most important thing for a teen is to be up-to-date and keep up with the Joneses. We like to talk about love and all its myriad glories. We want to experience new relationships. Contrary to this pop culture 10 years ago, we used to live a different kind of life. We didn’t involve ourselves in romantic relationships and we used to keep our counsel on such matters. Marriage was mostly arranged and gender equality was unheard of.
As time passed, culture, society, rules and everything else have changed. I believe we have to keep up with the time and change ourselves. Sure parents are concerned that we may end up with the wrong person and that is fine. If so, they should talk openly with their children about these issues. They should draw a line on what things their children can do and cannot. However, discouraging dating altogether is not an option.
In the midst of a terrific generation and the battle of technology with knowledge, people often tend to lose themselves in the whirl of wrong and right. Teens often go through the unacceptable horror of reality which they rather like to neglect. About relationships they least know and physical relationship are quite influential among these tender ages. This fact makes teenage quite worrisome, especially for parents.
The definition of relationship seems to have changed. Movies interpret it differently and teens quickly adopt it. In this crucial time, grooming must begin early which is why parents must have a good communication and understanding with their children. This will ensure honesty of the child, which is very important. Teens have aggressive minds, at times they should be left alone to make peace with themselves, if possible meditation can be adopted. One should always make sure that their child hasn’t been ove
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