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Malia Griggs is a writer, editor, and social storyteller who joined SELF's commerce team in 2020. Previously, she worked at The Daily Beast , Comedy Central, and Cosmopolitan. In addition to shopping, she has written about mental health, burnout, epilepsy, race, and relationships.
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Whether you realize it or not, there are many situations in which knowing how to convert household items into homemade sex toys is a real plus. Maybe you’re away from home and realize you’re without your favorite sex toy ; maybe things have gotten heated and you don’t have time to hunt for a vibrator ; maybe you’re looking to try a new kink without investing much money. Or maybe you just want to surprise your partner (or yourself).
Whatever the reason, Barbara Carrella , a certified sexologist and author of Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century, says a DIY sex toy (which she calls a pervertible) is never far: “Pervertibles are every day, non-erotic items that can be easily converted into sex toys. They can be found absolutely everywhere, and once you start finding them, it’s hard to stop seeing the erotic potential in all sorts of everyday items.”
We spoke to a variety of sex educators and experts about their top picks for unassuming everyday objects you can bring into your sex life, either with a partner or by yourself. While there’s no true replacement for a body-safe sex toy , Rae Chen, sex and beauty editor of TheNotice.net , tells SELF: “There are a lot of household items that can double as sex toys for the brave (or very, very horny). Ideally, I recommend using only new, clean items."
From spatulas to throw pillows, Carrellas says once you start looking for pervertibles, “you can expand your erotic imagination and increase your pleasure possibilities.” (And save money too.) Below, we’ve rounded up a few of the best homemade sex toys, as well as expert recommendations for how to safely enjoy them. 
All products featured on SELF are independently selected by our editors. However, when you buy something through our retail links, we may earn an affiliate commission.
Ice cubes are a great gateway to the DIY sex toy game because they’re not messy and can easily be tossed down the drain if you’re not feeling it, Gigi Engle, resident sex educator at 3Fun and author of All The F*cking Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life , tells SELF. 
As for how to employ the ice cubes, she says: “The nipples are a hot zone (pun intended). Run the cold object around your partner’s nipples and then over each one, taking note of how they respond. If they’re clearly enjoying themselves, move down their body. Focus on the inner thighs and hip bones.” And if they’re into that sensation, engage their penis or vulva last. 
Be sure you always have fresh ice cubes ready to go—a task made easy if you own a useful refillable silicone ice cube tray like this one above. (Before you ask, they’re molded like coffee beans , we promise.) For more traditional shapes, try these freezer trays from Amazon .
“A wooden spoon is an excellent toy for spanking when you’re ready to move on from a flat palm,” Engle says. She advises that the spoon be on the newer side and finished, as you wouldn’t want to give your partner splinters in their rear. Once you’ve pulled the spoon out of its drawer, use the back of it as a paddle, but(t) don’t hit with full force. “Work your way up to more intense strokes,” Engle adds. “As beginners, it can take some time to get your bearings. Remember, always ask your partner if something feels good or is too rough.”
You don’t have to invest in a full-on BDSM kit to incorporate some light bondage into your play. Carol Queen, staff sexologist at Good Vibrations , recommends pulling out a bandana, which you might already have lying around (or maybe now’s the time you buy a cute scarf like this one from Madewell, which comes in an Afterglow Red colorway). 
Crucially, avoid bandanas made of fabrics as slinky as silk or satin, as those materials get dangerously tight when you knot them. “Fold or twist a cotton bandana or scarf, however, and you can tie wrists much more safely,” Queen says, adding that you should still be able to slide one finger between the scarf and skin.
Another way to use a bandana? As a blindfold, tied to the side so the wearer doesn’t have to place their head on an awkward knot.
“Swishing around mouthwash (or sucking on a mint ) before or during oral sex will create a pleasurable tingling sensation which will feel amazing for your partner if they’re into that type of stimulation,” says sex and relationship therapist Malika O’Neill , LPC, and founder and CEO of The Pleasure Collective, LLC . This homemade sex toy has the added bonus of freshening your breath too.
“ Humping items like pillows , blankets, and sofa arms can be perfect for external stimulation,” Chen says. “Just be sure to cover them with something you can launder.”
Given its length and rod-like curves, the phallic hairbrush handle makes for an easily accessible and dildo-like sex toy . Experts don’t recommend you insert anything that isn’t an actual sex toy inside of you, but if you must, Chen says: “Insertable household items like the iconic hairbrush, toothbrush, or cucumber should be covered with a condom to prevent yeast and bacterial infections.”
Be sure to wash and dry everything before and after use, and, most importantly, “For the love of the emergency room, don’t put anything without a flared base up your butt! That means yes to the hairbrush, but no to the cucumber.” Experts also recommend using a water-based lube .
Speaking of lube , a good go-to item is coconut oil , which Chen calls an “amazing lubricant you can find in the kitchen that’s safe for use on skin and sex toys and makes for a great massage oil too.” In fact, Chen says, any neutral vegetable oil (like EVOO) is safe for use just as long as it's not flavored. One more thing to know is that oil doesn’t mix with latex condoms—so if you’re getting kinky with coconut oil, be sure to pair it with a non-latex (polyurethane) condom.
Another fantastic spanker? A silicone spatula. “Make sure you choose a well-made spatula,” Queen says. “The danger with a cheap one is that the flexible end might fly off the handle when you’re using it.” To avoid accidents, we’ve got our eye on this lovely lilac model from Williams Sonoma, which has a cool stainless steel handle that you can personalize with whatever text you like. Go ahead—get creative.
“A bathrobe is something that lots of people have sitting around, and its tie can be used as a blindfold and for bondage ,” Jenn Mason, the owner of WinkWink Boutique , tells SELF. Just pull the tie out of any robe (or, hell, a wrap dress ) and use it to tie wrists together or to a headboard.
If a bandana isn’t nearby, another reliable blindfold stand-in is a good old cotton T-shirt, which Engle calls an ideal blindfold. “While spanking and wrist-tying is fun, start with the blindfold alone,” she says. “Once it’s secured over your eyes, have your partner kiss you and massage you with essential oils. Then, the sexy stuff can really get underway.”
Yoga and meditation lovers, put that bolster to uses other than back stretching. Bolsters are excellent for humping, Queen says, as they’re a bit like bunched-up pillows but firmer—meaning you’ll get better stimulation from rubbing yourself on them.
If you’ve got a foam roller on hand (or were looking for a reason to buy one), Queen notes that the more slender variety can be used for impact play (as can pool noodles, although they’re a bit on the long side).
“There’s nothing more erotic than getting oiled up for some sexual fun,” O-Neill says. Pro-tip for parents: The baby oil you keep around can be dual-purposed as a massage oil in a pinch.
One more blindfold option is a sleep mask . We’re partial to this soft, silky mask from Blissy, which is as great for hair and skin as it is at allowing you to try bondage play.
If you’ve got a penis and a plush toy nearby, “cut a hole so you can insert your penis into the interior and do your thing,” O’Neill advises. The stuffing and pressure should create an enjoyable sensation. While we’re not recommending that you go looking for your children’s stuffed animals, maybe you’ve got a plush prize from a county fair hanging around the house somewhere. Either way, O’Neill recommends wearing a condom in case you want to use the toy again.
Of course, if you don’t own any plush toys, a throw pillow works just as well.
Here’s a homemade sex toy idea that’s seasonally appropriate: “Those cheap-y thong sandals that so many people have for summer can be great for spanking,” Mason says. “They’re a bit stingy, and you want to make sure they’re not too dirty, but they make a really great spanking device.”
“If you want to have a ‘messy’ sexual experience that may include bodily fluids and don’t want to ruin your sheets, a shower curtain may be the thing you need,” O’Neill says. Opt for a plastic curtain over a fabric one, and cover your existing bedsheets with it before you get down and dirty.
At the bare minimum, you at least have a pair of socks somewhere in your house. While not especially glamorous, if you or your partner have a penis and are looking for a simple feel-good fix, O’Neill recommends filling a sock with lube or (unscented) lotion and masturbating away. “If partnered, have your partner give you a hand job, or you can use your own sex toy and join the fun,” she says. And if you’re short on sex toys, well, read this article again.
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So you just watched Chyna's muscular, pocky heiny get befouled by a greasy little man, and you're pretty confident that you could wrangle up an inebriated girl with five kids and low self-esteem who might want to make a movie too. That's awesome. I've pondered it too but any time I bring the idea up it's generally met with revulsion. Apparently Internet comedy CHUDs just aren't made for film. But the idea is still a good one, right?
Thanks to a string of C-list celebrities and low-budget websites, the idea of a home sex tape is now more reasonable than ever. Who would turn down a chance to hump on camera? Not me. Not you. Not anyone. But let this be a warning to you: Some things do not belong on camera.
For some reason real porn makes us want to make amateur porn. But look at amateur porn. Look at Screech for God's sake. Like a malnourished, shaven orangutan, he brings nothing to the table. In real porn, actors and actresses are chosen from the finest broken homes in the Midwest and given top of the line plastic surgery and full body make up. Have you ever heard of asshole bleaching? Porn stars do that. A porn star is so dedicated to their job that, when given some constructive criticism on set like, "Hey, Starla, I noticed your anus is looking a bit on the dingy side, maybe look into that?" they make a mental note to visit the ass bleaching salon later in the day and have a stranger apply some manner of pigment-reducing spackle to their crapper. Right on the hole.
While their asses look like sparkling puckers of sanitation and delight, fashioned from the finest alabaster and stank, mine looks like the Sarlacc that ate Boba Fett. It has no business on camera and chances are yours will be just as atrocious. You could always bend over in front of a mirror and try to gauge where yours stands, but you'll probably need at least one other present for a comparison. In the end you'll probably just depress yourself.
Other areas you may want to reconsider showing on camera include the underside of your sack, the front of your sack, any parts of you covered in hair and the back of your head if you have one of those weird skin folds. You know those things? It's like a dinner roll of head flesh. Just off putting, that is.
The thing about porn sex is that it's designed specifically to be filmed. Like have you ever noticed how often dudes get into the most horribly uncomfortable looking positions? That's to accommodate a sweaty man with a large camera who wants to perform an unlicensed colonoscopy or some other manner of internal review with a fish-eye lens. So we're given a wide array of shots and angles that necessitate the performers humping around corners and engaging in visually stunning but horribly unfulfilling maneuvers.
True story: Back in aught-6 I was inspired after viewing some adult cinema to try sex standing up. Like the kind where you just pick the woman right up and hold her there like some kind of bag of hump potatoes. What was I thinking? I work at a computer all day, my whole body has atrophied to pudding. To this day my back has not healed and there's still a dent in the drywall from my head.
Porn inspires you to do stupid sex. Sex that doesn't really feel good but we're convinced is awesome because porn stars seem to love it. But you could give a porn star $20 and a sandwich and she'd fake an orgasm over Weetabix. And it'd be wild too. She'd call Weetabix a whore and tell it to spank her. Wish I had some Weetabix...
You break out the camera and you think you're going to capture unchained passion but really you're probably just going to catch your goodie bag jiggling like a cat toy made from bologna.
Some people like amateur porn because of its "grittiness"; which is like enjoying authentic Central American water for the dysentery. Porn has to have some quality for it to be good. Real porn is on a sound stage, or at least some dude's backyard, there's lighting and sound equipment and the camera probably didn't come from the Wal-Mart electronics department.
Have you ever been in a public restroom when an overweight man in a hurry comes in? And you're forced to take the next stall and just sit in silent horror and listen as he tries to both get comfortable and stave off an aneurysm? Why is there is much heavy breathing? And squishing? And then wet plops. That's what homemade porn sounds like.
Lighting is one of the most underappreciated aspects of filmmaking. If not for lighting, those pristine, fake boobies that make legit porn so enthralling would look like the decrepit peaks of Mordor. But they don't, do they? No sir, they look delightful. But under your Simpsons novelty lamp they and your ass are going to look flatter than piss on a plate and marred with creeping black shadows.
Probably there weren't a lot of people back in film school learning how to chop and master film reel who were hoping one day to use their talents to string together a series of scenes featuring midgets running a train on a middle-aged lady, but not everyone gets to live their dream. But the fact is they're still working and their work is important.
Thanks to editors, you rarely ever have to watch the action in a porno screech to a halt because someone ate chili last night and now has the wind something fierce.
Thanks to editors, when the lead actress starts weeping, softly at first, and then full on tears of desolation and panic, you're instead treated to stock footage of vigorous thrusting.
Thanks to editors, when the lead actor suddenly realizes his parents never loved him and his willy sinks like the future of a family signing up for a subprime mortgage, you never see it. You just see him when he comes back full of blow and Viagra and is ready to rage hump his abandonment issues away.
And if you had an editor, you'd never have to see the full 10-minute sequence when the camera tumbles off the stack of books you put it on so that instead of hot, enticing coitus, all you filmed was a sideways view of the game of peek-a-boo your hairy ass cheeks play as they bob in and out of frame.
Unbelievable though it may be, someone writes porn. They do all that stuff on purpose. There's a dude who has to wake up every morning, get his coffee, sit at a computer and tap his brain to think up a novel new way for a pool cleaner named Mandingo to work off a debt to a woman with breasts that are actually perfe
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