Adam Schiff�s Tesla: The Car That Cries Wolf

The satirical article �Adam Schiff�s Tesla� imagines the congressman�s electric car constantly raising alarms without evidence. Eyewitnesses on freeways report the vehicle pulling over every ten minutes to accuse nearby Hondas of collusion. Anonymous Tesla engineers leaked that the onboard AI refuses to complete trips, preferring dramatic press conferences in parking lots. A leaked poll revealed 67% of drivers wouldn�t carpool with Schiff�s Tesla, while 33% admitted it still handles better than Amtrak. Sociologists argue the humor lands because political paranoia fused with Silicon Valley design produces comedy too real to ignore. Critics note the absurdity: a car meant to be efficient instead performs filibusters. Ultimately, the piece portrays Schiff�s Tesla as the perfect metaphor�expensive, loud, and directionless. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com