Accent: is it a problem?

Talking to native speakers can be scary. Especially if it's your first time. Especially if you are in a performing mode (as opposed to relating).

Russian speakers usually have 2 main concerns:

1. I won’t understand sh*t
2. I will sound Russian ('cause what a horrible sin that is)

So here are some stories I want to share:

A listening story

My first exposure to the British accent happened when I was 14. It was my first modelling trip in Tokyo. I had a photoshoot with a male model — a handsome guy, in his twenties by the looks of him. The idea of interacting with him seemed terrifying. Mainly because he was a man and I was a shy kid.

But I felt like I at least had to say 'hi' before we'd go and pretend to be a hot couple. So I did, and he answered, and I understood NOTHING. Not a word. 5 min later I realized that the first sentence was 'Nice to meet you, I'm Collin'.

I did not attempt to talk to Collin again. Felt defeated and totally disappointed in my English. Until Nataly — a gorgeous redhead from the US — told me later that day: don't worry, sweetheart, I can’t understand him either.

And I was like — wow, so that wasn’t about me?

Here’s the thing: successful communication is the responsibility of ALL the parties involved. That means willingness to ask for clarification and willingness to clarify. There’s a wonderful sketch about it on YouTube:

A speaking story

Some time ago I had dinner with my housemates in Vietnam. We had a pretty mixed crowd there: 2 Russians, 1 Filipina, 1 American. I was tired and overheated. My mouth felt sluggish. Out of the blue, my American friend says:

Your Russian accent seems stronger now.

And I instantly start cowering, admitting the embarrassing fact like a defeated dog. The cloud of shame is descending upon me. My mind promptly starts coming up with rationalizing justifications, as if to apologize for the way I speak:

… we have different phonetic systems, when I'm extremely tired my muscles default to their learned position...

Interrupting my thoughts, he adds:

It's beautiful.

And the whole narrative that I had about the Russian accent being something undesirable flips.

Here's the thing: I have my set of associations with different accents, including that of my compatriots. Everybody does. Where they fit in another person’s head along the vectors of ‘aggressive’, ‘stupid’, ‘disgusting’, ‘sexy’, ‘professional’, ‘mysterious’ — we cannot tell.

I won’t say that accents don’t matter and don’t affect our perception — of course they do. We all have narratives about the world and people of different cultures in our head. But we cannot control other people’s perceptions of us, nor should we.

Here’s another funny video on that:

Accent is one of the first things we perceive about people. It can even beat their visual appearance. But, just like the looks, it fades in the background once we start actually relating.

As my former teamlead said — if you don’t want to sound like a Russian gangster — learn diplomatic communication🙃

The hidden value of your accent

One last story…

One day me and my friends from different places got into talking about how speaking different languages affects our level of confidence and psychological safety.

I often talk about the fact that a second (third, etc,) language, up to a certain point, can serve as an emotional buffer. If a topic involves shame / guilt / fear in your mother tongue, it’s easier to discuss it in some other language.

So the female part of our group — none of us being native English speakers and all of being from relatively conservative cultures — agreed that talking about sex is much easier in English. I did not expect our American friend to relate because.. well, he’s a man. And he is only fluent in one language.

But he replied:

— It's easier for me to talk about sensitive topics when I'm imitating the Czech accent!

And then he masterfully demonstrated the Slavic accent that Russians are trying so hard to hide. What do you know, it has its uses after all🙃

Finally, a personal observation: I feel equally fake when I try to imitate the Valley girl accent and when I'm attempting to speak with the 'Russian' accent. To the point that I stumble and can't form coherent sentences. It almost feels like I'm trying to speak some new, not very familiar language.

They way you naturally sound — whatever that is — works. As long as it feels authentic to you. And then you collect the feedback from people you talk to — how well they understand you, if the message is interpreted more or less as intended — and calibrate what you say and how you say it. It's about gradual adjustment, not about preparing perfectly in advance.

Read more:

Language Barrier: what it's protecting us from

What's my English level and what does it mean?

Is the IT vocabulary bubble enough? 

Boost your work vocabulary in a week

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