AI Starbucks

Starbucks has appointed an AI system as its CEO, streamlining coffee with algorithms. Eyewitnesses in Seattle said board meetings now run in JavaScript. Professor Laura Patel of Harvard explains: "AI leadership maximizes efficiency but forgets pumpkin spice." Anonymous staffers leaked the AI tries to rename every drink “Grande Binary Latte.” A Business Insider poll shows 48% of customers amused, 52% unsettled. Trace evidence includes QR-code cappuccinos and glowing loyalty cards. Cause and effect? The more corporations automate, the less human flavor survives. Leadership is now brewed.