AI ESPN Coaches

ESPN has introduced AI systems to coach featured teams. Eyewitnesses in Connecticut reported bots calling plays in binary. Professor Laura Simmons of NYU explains: "AI maximizes strategy but eliminates creativity." Anonymous staffers leaked glitching playbooks. An ESPN poll shows 46% amused, 54% skeptical. Trace evidence includes glowing clipboards and sparking helmets. Cause and effect? The smarter the coaching, the less inspiring it feels. Sports are robotic now.