50 Shades Darker Nude Scenes
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50 Shades Darker Nude Scenes
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12:00 PM PST, February 10, 2017
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We're all going to see Fifty Shades Darker this weekend for the same reason, right? To learn the inner workings of the Seattle book publishing industry? And then for the sex. Since Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson say they were "more comfortable" shooting those scenes this time around, it's no surprise the movie is much more NSFW.
Below, all of the sex by the numbers. (Yes, we did math during Fifty Shades Darker .)
9: Percent of the movie that is sex scenes, with a running time just shy of two hours. (Two hours!)
16: Seconds before you see Dornan shirtless. (During a nightmare and the first of already too many sepia-tinted traumatic childhood flashbacks.)
19: Minutes before the first "vanilla" sex scene.
40: Minutes before the first "kinky" sex scene.
2: Appearances by the infamous Red Room of Pain.
2: Sex scenes that take place off-camera. (You played yourself, Fifty Shades Darker .)
5: Total number of spanks delivered, including one playful, fully clothed pat.
1: Scene where Christian Grey is shirtless and Ana draws on him with lipstick.
1: Scene of Christian doing shirtless pull-ups and pommel horse. (Because he just has a pommel horse in his apartment.)
4: Times you see a portion of Dornan's butt.
1: Time you see a portion of Dornan's pubes.
1: Full-frontal scene that Dornan is rumored to have shot for Fifty Shades Darker and that was ultimately cut from the finished film. Resulting in a MILLION questions for director James Foley, the producers, the editor, Dornan himself, E.L. James, the studio, the MPAA, your local cinema and whatever higher power you believe in.
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Fifty Shades Darker: The Christian Grey Nudity Breakdown
February 17, 2017
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Fifty Shades Darker is one of those movies where, if you're planning on seeing it, you're not really asking whether it's good . (But for what it's worth: it is better than Fifty Shades of Grey .) One question it's natural to have about a film based on the notoriously sex-filled books from E L James is: how much nudity is in this movie?
It's a fair question and one we had back when we were waiting for Fifty Shades of Grey , and Jamie Dornan dashed dreams everywhere when he said we wouldn't be seeing his "todger." And, of course, there was lots of nudity in the first movie. So how does Fifty Shades Darker stack up?
Well, Jamie Dornan said he didn't know a few months ago and that we'd have to "wait and see." Unsurprisingly, we see no penis. This is rated R, not NC-17, after all, and in today's pop culture, it's a rare title that shows us male full-frontal nudity. But at least it's not that unfair — in Fifty Shades of Grey , Dakota Johnson did full frontal, including an infamous pubic hair shot, but this time, she's relatively under wraps. I mean, she shows her breasts a lot, because this is America.
As for Dornan? We get a tease of the top of his butt in an early scene, then later, in the Red Room, we see him naked from the back. Full rearal, if you will. It's distinct also because in most of the sex scenes, he rarely gets fully naked. I guess he likes doing it in pants, like a reverse Donald Duck. You do you, Christian Grey.
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By Mallory Schlossberg Published: Feb 8, 2018
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In honor of the franchise's "climax." (You're welcome!)
The day is finally upon us. The third Fifty Shades installment, Fifty Shades Freed — or what the advertisements are so cleverly calling the climax (get it?!) — hits theaters February 9. In honor of the series' highly anticipated finish , here's a Very Scientific ranking of the franchise's most memorable sex scenes … so far. (If you'd like to follow along at home, you can stream the first two movies here and here .)
Arguably, this is the most realistic of all the sex scenes in the Fifty Shades series. Christian and Ana have already slept together for the first time, which presumably means he's already awoken her "Inner Goddess." After a bath and a sensual scrub that feels straight out of a commercial for a mall jeweler, he ties her up with his own tie (v. DIY) and then almost goes down on Ana. But just when things are starting to get good, we hear the voice of Marcia Gay Harden (in a woefully underused role as Christian's mother). Oh no! Ana's naked, but Christian's mom is there! Time to put some clothes on! This scene will resonate deeply with anyone who has tried to engage in some sexy time, only to be thwarted by the sudden appearance of a family member or annoying roommate.
Christian might be a sociopath, but since we're all about seeing the good in people, I'd like to point out one of his more redeeming qualities: It's clear that he gets ALL of his sex tips from women's magazines from the early '90s (😎). This scene aims to titillate — Christian ties up Ana's wrists and blindfolds her with her shirt, then grabs an ice cube. He runs it ( slowly and sensually , of course) down her body, flips her over, spanks her, puts on a condom like a respectable gentleman, and has sex with her doggy style. Unfortunately, I have to detract points for how much emphasis the director decided to put on that damn ice cube. It almost becomes comical.
Ana's been wearin' silver balls up in her vagina throughout an entire auction, as one does. (Wait, I'm sorry: " Inner Goddess Silver Metal Pleasure Balls ," according to Fifty Shades ' very own sex toy line.) After Ana wins (loses? She pays $24,000) the auction, they get the hell out — and then they return to Christian's childhood bedroom, for some reason. They passionately kiss. "I want you to spank me ," Ana says. He ties up her wrists. Then he unties her, takes out the balls, and flips her over, and then ... the sex commences. He asks her to come for him, but, like, it's only been a few minutes. Has Christian ever actually had sex with a lady? Does he know how long it takes women to finish?
OK, maybe this is the most relatable sex scene because it's kind of feels straight outta #datenight . Christian goes down on Ana (one of the only decent traits about him is that he's enthusiastic about performing oral sex).
"What do you want, Anastasia?" he asks, VERY dramatically. "I want all of you, " she replies, all breathily.
They then proceed to have tame missionary sex because they are clearly no longer reading our expert-approved tips for spicing up their sex lives .
Is it just me, or are games of pool in the movies + on TV approximately 10000 times sexier than they are in real life? Anyway, during a spirited game of billiards, Christian says he hopes Ana's not a sore loser. Her reply? "It depends how hard you spank me." He then informs Ana he's going to be rough with her . He bends her over and then proceeds to have sex with her from behind, on the pool table, because he once heard Ludacris's "What's Your Fantasy?" and thought I can do better than that list.
Real talk: Most of the Fifty Shades Darker sexxxxx scenes kind of blur together. This scene is different (ish) because Christian uses a metal spreader bar on Ana (available on Amazon , if you're curious, because if there's one thing the Fifty Shades series is good at, it's selling stuff ). He goes down on her again, flips her over, and has doggy style sex with her. Everybody wins!
After a highly implausible shower escapade (their...clothes are on???), Ana says she wants to go into the Red Room — which they do — which means that type of sex is about to happen. If you're into that, this is great! If you're not, it's not. The most exciting part of this, to me, is their ability to travel so swiftly from shower to Red Room without an awkward exchange of towels. Movie magic at its finest.
This was the moment everyone was waiting for. The first time they do it . The people behind-the-scenes really tried their hardest to make this seem romantic, and like the way everyone wishes they had lost their virginity. There's a shot of Ana's leg hair (because virgins don't shave their thighs, apparently), you get a Jamie Dornan butt shot, and then you get some standard issue missionary sex, because as we will come to learn throughout the series, Christian Grey is a man of few actually exciting sex moves.
Or, wait…is this what everyone was waiting for? Set to the tune of a mediocre cover of "Crazy In Love," filled to the brim with flogging, rope, restraints, and sex...well, it definitely isn't boring, I'll give it that.
Honestly,
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