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When one-on-one sex gets stale, it may be time to add another person to your couple in order to spice things up.
Unfortunately, that’s easier said than done, as finding a partner to join you for a threesome is nothing but a fantasy for most people — or at least it was, until the good ol’ internet came about.
Today, there are many sex sites and apps that can help you find the perfect third for your next romp, but they’re not all created equal. Below, we’ll take a look at the best threesome dating sites on the internet today.
We can’t guarantee you’ll get lucky — we can only guarantee that these are the best apps and websites out there for organizing a ménage à trois!
Adult Friend Finder is an absolutely huge swinger and threesome website. You can find people who are into virtually every fetish under the sun — and yes, that includes threesomes.
The great thing about this site is that it’s entirely geared around finding casual sex partners. Everyone’s there for sex — so all you have to do is offer them an opportunity.
There are even people there exclusively to find threesome partners. That includes couples looking for a third, bulls looking for hotwives, and everything in between.
Many of the people on there are “real” (read: not models), and you have to sign up for a premium membership to do anything worthwhile on there, but overall it’s a great place for a couple to find your next unicorn.
“FetLife” is short for “Fetish Life,” so that should give you a pretty good idea of what to expect from the site.
Most of their clientele enjoys things like BDSM, making this a great choice for doms looking for subs (or vice versa). This is good if your tastes run a little extreme, but you should understand it also limits the partner pool somewhat.
The good news is that you can really let your freak flag fly , and since it functions more as a social network than a bdsm dating site , you might just make some new friends as well.
Best of all, it’s largely free (although you can make a donation in exchange for a few extra features). The demographics skew heavily male, though, as nearly 75% of all members are men.
You don’t have to spend money to find the perfect partner, and Dirty Reddit R4R is proof of that. Be sure you’re on the “dirty” version, though, as there’s also a regular R4R that’s better-suited for conventional dating.
Dirty R4R hooks you up with users across the globe. This creates a lot of useless posts for you to weed through, however, and causes the site to look more active than it really is.
If you can find a diamond in the rough, though, it’s one of the best adult dating sites out there. They limit how often you can post, which cuts down on the bots and spammers, and they don’t allow the posting of personal information, which should help you feel safe.
This site is best-suited for virtual hookups, but given that it’s completely free, there’s no sense in not giving it a shot.
Seeking is designed primarily to hook sugar daddies up with sugar babies . This arrangement is skeevy and off-putting to some, but it’s a great way to find a gorgeous young woman to hook up with.
Maybe she’ll be into a threesome – it depends.
Still, this arrangement (get it?) solves several of the biggest threesome-related problems for many couples. For one thing, it guarantees sex with an attractive woman, and it also allows for the situation to develop over time without threatening the primary relationship .
It’s not for everyone, but it could be a great option for some couples with cash to splash.
As the name suggests, 3Fun is completely dedicated to polyamory, with a special emphasis on finding partners for threesomes.
It requires users to link their profile to a working phone or Facebook account, as well as upload at least one picture. It’s not perfect, but this system does a better job of weeding out fake accounts than most threesome websites.
This unique threesome website has some cool features you won’t find on traditional dating apps. One of these is their synchronized chat feature, which allows all 3 partners to flirt simultaneously.
This is a surprisingly popular site, with over 2 million (mostly young) users. If you live in a big city or built-up metropolitan area, there should be plenty of unicorns or couples for you to browse through and find your perfect match.
Feeld is one of the oldest threesome-based sites, and it’s kind of a mix between Tinder, 3Fun, and FetLife in many ways.
One of the best things about the site is that it lets you be very specific about what you’re looking for. This obviously comes in very handy if you’re a couple trying to find a threesome partner.
The user base tends to be pretty sex-savvy as well. If you say you’re polyamorous or pansexual , everyone will know what you mean — and plenty of people will be into it.
In many ways, it’s one of the most mature hookup sites out there, as you can have frank discussions about exactly what you’re looking for without beating around the bush… so to speak.
Grindr may be the king of casual sex apps, and it’s also a great place to find a threesome partner. Unlike some of the other sites and apps on this list, Grindr uses a geolocator to match you with guys that are in close physical proximity to you.
The app’s huge user base makes it a no-brainer pick for the best gay threesome site , but that base can also work against you. Because it uses your location to find matches, filtering those matches to find the perfect one isn’t easy.
Most people don’t provide much in the way of profile information, either.
The app does have both paid and free ad-supported options , but the free version is usually all most guys need to find some action. As long as you’re not too particular about your matches (or if you just want a threesome right this second ), Grindr is an excellent choice for a free gay sex site .
While other group sex sites (like 3Fun) have options for all sorts of things, like orgies or polyamory, 3Somer stays true to its name. This is for finding threesome partners, and nothing else.
This specificity limits the user base, and it only has a few hundred thousand registered people. However, you know everyone on there is open to a three-way.
It’s open to users of any age or gender, although most of the users are young and male. They require a photo upload to register, but they don’t have any other verification requirements.
No one can argue that the app doesn’t bend over backward to make threesomes happen, though. You can chat or send voice messages, and there’s a reverse search feature that helps you find people who are looking for someone like you.
Trying to find a partner for a threesome isn’t like trying to find a partner for a regular date. If you don’t know how to approach the situation, you’ll never be successful in finding your unicorn.
With that in mind, here are the criteria we used to rank the top threesome dating websites out there today:
None of this is to say that you can’t find a threesome partner on Tinder or Bumble or any of the other umpteen dating sites out there. If you want to maximize your chances of finding a third, though, you’ll want to look on one of the threesome websites on the list.
Having a threesome remains the holy grail of sex for many people, and the sites above make it easier than ever to finally make it happen.
Adult Friend Finder represents your best chance of getting lucky due to its huge open-minded user base. However, every threesome site or threesome app on this list is capable of hooking you up with your next unicorn.
Better yet, if having threesomes somehow gets old, many of these sites will also help you find a fourth person…
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According to a small recent study, this type of ménage à trois is a lot more common than you think
“The Eiffel Tower is such a thing,” says Rachel* (names have been changed to protect sources' privacy), a 25-year-old recent college graduate. To be clear, Rachel isn't referring to the iconic Parisian landmark: she's referring to a slang term for a sex position where a woman is on all fours and giving oral sex to one man, while another man has sex with her from behind. What makes it an Eiffel Tower is when the two men high-five each other, forming the point of what is basically a squirmy, sloppy triangle. "It's one of the best parts," she gushes.
Rachel is polyamorous, which means she is in relationships with multiple partners — in this case, two men. They both know each other, and they're cool with Rachel having sex with each of them individually. Rachel says they're also turned on by the idea of “sharing” her, which means that occasionally, they'll all have sex at the same time.
Before she met her boyfriends, Rachel had had a few threesomes with other women. But guy-guy threesomes are a favorite of hers — and, Rachel adds, they are severely underrated. Being the “center of attention” and having the power to “call the shots” during sex with two men, Rachel says, is “the most empowering experience.”
Threesomes are a common fantasy : according to a 2016 Archives of Sexual Behavior study , 82 percent of heterosexual men and 31 percent of heterosexual women have fantasized about having a menage a trois at one point or another. While that study didn't specify what type of threesome people most often fantasized about, girl-girl-guy has typically been considered the gold standard of threesomes, with a separate study indicating that one in three men have fantasized about being in the middle of a two-lady sandwich. But that doesn't necessarily mean your partner will be into it. Morgan*, 24, hates girl-girl-guy threesomes because "the other girl isn't always that skilled at [giving me] pleasure,” she says. That's why she prefers having sex with two men at the same time .
Morgan, Rachel, and their partners aren’t alone in their love of MMF threeways. According to researcher Dr. Ryan Scoats of Birmingham City University, who got his PhD. studying threesomes , five of the 30 men he surveyed had had a threesome with a man. While that sample size is admittedly small, he told Broadly that he got the sense that while MMF threesomes would have been "more stigmatized" in the past, the men he polled "did seem comfortable telling at least their friends that they'd had an MMF threesome. I think because of the reduction of homophobia in general within society, this allows men to have these kinds of threesomes with no fear about what others are going to think of them for it." Scoats also cited previous research supporting the idea that straight, working-class guys in the United Kingdom are increasingly participating in " emotional intimacy and physical tactility " with each other.
The idea that straight men are becoming increasingly comfortable with same-sex experimentation isn't necessarily new. According to author and sociologist Jane Ward, who wrote Not Gay: Sex Between Straight White Men (which famously spawned the phrase " bro jobs" ), it's not uncommon for straight dudes to engage in sexual acts with each other without self-identifying as gay or bisexual. Sexual fluidity, the idea that sexual orientation and attraction to a particular gender can ebb, flow, and change over time, is becoming more socially acceptable: while there's an idea that women are inherently more sexually fluid than men , Ward attributes this to “long-held beliefs about the fundamental difference between men and women that are not accurate.”
That doesn't necessarily mean that guy-guy-girl threesomes have to necessarily involve guy-on-guy contact (hence, the anxiety over " crossing swords ," or how the Lonely Island music video for " Threeway " — featuring the line "it's not gay if it's in a threeway" — became a cultural punchline). But even if two men are having sex with one woman at the same time and not interacting with each other at all, the MMF three-way is still highly stigmatized.
“I think there’s a stigma that men feel that if they engage in play with another man present, that it is gay or that it means they like men. While this may be the case [if the two men are gay], it doesn't have to be at all. It can just be about pleasure or an experience,” says Nicoletta Heidegger , a sexologist based in Los Angeles.
For Alex*, a heterosexual, 28-year-old freelance cinematographer, MMF threesomes aren’t about the other guy at all — and he’s had several, with different partners. “I love facilitating a girl’s fantasy of being with two guys," he says. “I enjoy doing my best to give her as much pleasure as possible, and then watching someone else extend the pleasurable experience for her." (Watching another dude have sex with your partner is actually a pretty common fetish: according to Pornhub Insights , searches for the term "cuckolding," or watching your wife have sex with another man, have increased substantially in the past few years.)
Alex thinks a lot of the stigma surrounding MMF threeways derives not just from "homophobia," but also from a “sense of ownership” of the woman involved. Which makes sense: if you're not turned on the idea of watching your partner have sex with someone else, group sex can often incite jealousy, no matter what the third party's gender is. That's why it's important to have an open conversation with your partner about your boundaries and your desires before having a threesome , regardless of who's invited into the mix.
FFM may be most couples’ go-to when venturing into the wide world of open relationships or group sex, but if you’re both into it, it's worth considering MMF as part of the rotation. “It’s rare for a girl to feel safe enough to ask, follow through, and allow you to be involved,” Alex says. But when it works, it can be a lot of fun for everyone involved. “If you think it’s hot, it’s hot,” Rachel says.
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