3 Some Relationships

3 Some Relationships

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"We had to tackle some communication and trust issues we didn't know we had."
We're always hearing stories about how awesome threesomes can be your best sex ever if done right and with respect, so it's only natural to wonder whether it could be something you'd enjoy yourself. If you like the idea of consensual non-monogamy , try reading this bisexual threesome erotic fiction - it's a good one. Here, 11 people explain the impact having a threesome has had on their relationships.
"It didn't change our relationship. We have great communication when it comes to sex and that's all it takes really. We sometimes do sex parties and as long as we are open and honest about our boundaries and respect one another it's all good. It would destroy a relationship however if one or the other party was not 100% into it and just went along with it." [via]
"Destroyed it. We were too young, didn't think it through, invited our joint best friend to join us, had a three-way relationship for a couple months. Then it all went to hell. Do I regret it? Kind of. Looking back, it wasn't meant to be, and there were a lot of fun times. But I couldn't handle it in the long run and I would be loathe to try it again." [via]
"It made him constantly talk about how the experience had been with her and how much he wanted to repeat the experience over with pretty much every reasonably-attractive female friend I had. And he didn't explain this in a kind way at all. He's now my ex." [via]
"It makes our relationship stronger. The more threesomes we have (MFF), the closer we become. My GF legitimately derives pleasure from seeing me have sex with other women. She's also heavily lesbian-leaning on the bisexual spectrum, so it's more chances for her to fuck other women. I have a very strong libido and wear her out quickly (I'm on the larger side and she has a low pubic arch which combined makes extended sessions painful for her), so honestly it's kinda nice having multiple girls so I can go longer. The hanging out and breakfasts the next morning are also always lots of fun." [via]
"At first it was something she did for me (MFF threesomes). But as we did them, she had fun. She likes to be bad, and she likes to feel desired , and two people fawning over her in a threesome certainly does both. It's strengthened our relationship because we used the threesomes constructively - to focus on what we can do to make and keep each other happy. She's also very comfortable with the reality that I have no interest in other women - that my kink is seeing two women together and making her happy." [via]
"It didn't end it immediately, but it should have. I was young (18F), he was my first and I'm bi. He was always pushing for an open relationship, against my wishes. His way of getting around this was getting me drunk and pushing me into a threesome (FFM) with a friend. It was OK while it was happening, and we all went to sleep in the same bed.
"There were a lot of issues in our relationship"
"I was woken up later by them trying to go at it again... They stopped when I obviously got upset. There were a lot of issues in our relationship, that I didn't figure out until later. I'm sure threesomes are fine with the right circumstances and reasons, but mine was not that." [via]
"I kind of didn't really think much about it before I was suddenly in the moment and it was happening. Admittedly not the best idea. At that second I was suddenly really worried I was going to be super jealous of the other girl but it turned out I don't have that problem. It hasn't changed our relationship much at all, but I did find out I really like seeing him fuck other girls. I find it intensely sexy to see him have his way with another woman. It makes him even sexier to me. I like to think he's such a man he could have any woman." [via]
"It made us closer. We had to tackle some communication and trust issues that we didn't know we had. That either leads to a stronger relationship, or puts you on the rocks. It worked out well for us. That was over 15 years ago. We're still ethically non-monogamous." [via]
"My friend and I made a split second decision to both bone my boyfriend because we were fucked up, both horny af, and somehow realised we were both wearing black panties and black bras. That was our reasoning. We were so stupid. We did it a few more times after that. Then I found out they were sleeping together when I wasn't present and that fucking sucked. When we broke up, they ended up dating for like a year. It was hot and fun in the moment, but I don't think I'll ever do it again." [via]
"Didn't really change much, honestly. We were already ethically non-monogamous and had explored that a bit in various ways, so our first threesome didn't really bring anything huge up. Overall, being non-monogamous keeps us close . It stresses our communication skills and forces us to stay honest, with ourselves and the other. Overall its a huge positive for us." [via]
"Didn't change anything except made us want more threesomes. And foursomes. I married the best woman in the world." [via]

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Gigi Engle
Gigi Engle is a writer, certified sexologist, sex coach, and sex educator.

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Threesomes top the charts of many a sexual fantasy. Their popularity knows no bounds. According to a survey by ABC N ews , 21 percent of Americans have had a threesome fantasy.
So, what about those who have actually gone a step further and had sex in a trio, whether as a joining part or as part of a couple? What are those experiences like? We all want to know.
And if you’re thinking of trying a threesome, it doesn't hurt to know what you’re in for, plus how (or if) it will affect your relationships with the people involved.
To get the lowdown, we asked seven real people about their threesome experiences and how bringing this fantasy to life affected them afterward.
"My partner and I spent time with a female friend visiting from Canada. We spent an entire day in each other’s company, talking and laughing. We talked so late into the night that it made sense for her to stay at our place instead of driving her back to her hotel room. The three of us came together for a group hug and she nuzzled my neck. It was all the encouragement I needed. Our hands and mouths were everywhere at once. My partner was content to watch but in the heat of the moment, I desperately wanted to see them together. I invited him in—with her consent—and we switched back and forth between each other. I was overcome with emotion—positive emotions. I’d never experienced my partner’s pleasure from the outside looking in, but I could think of nothing better. I truly felt like my heart expanded to encompass the moment and their shared passion. I’d never loved him more than I did in that moment.
"After it was over and she went back home, we went through a bit of grief from missing her. My partner and I spent a lot of time checking with each other—and her. We talked over the details, and the few issues we’d felt. Specifically, I felt excluded once or twice—not from their play but from knowing about it. That’s when we learned that I was comfortable with much of what they did together (without me), but nothing could feel like a secret or an unknown. That was a moment in time when we learned we might have the capacity for a poly relationship and allowing other people into our relationship. We established ground rules (based on what we knew at the time) and communicated. We were fortunate that our threesome ended so well. We’re still friends with that person and there’s talk of having another experience when she visits again." — Kayla, 38
"While living in San Francisco, I was invited to a private party in Napa—a bunch of lovely ladies and some power couples in a lavish vineyard mansion. We had dinner and plenty of wine and started playing silly games. I remember being invited to bed by a couple—I had never had a threesome—but I was curious. I liked the gal but the guy was okay—I didn't want to have sex with him so I made my boundary clear upfront: I didn't want to be kissed by him or to have sex with him, but he was welcome to touch and please me. He was very respectful. His girlfriend and I came and we fell asleep.
"The next morning...we all had started getting naughty again...then suddenly one of the other girls happened to walk into our room and next thing I knew—she joined us and started eating me out. EVERYTHING was so surreal. But it was fun. Sorta like a bucket list I was happy to check off." — Erin*, 34
Watch men and women come up with names for these adventurous sex positions:
"I have had multiple threesomes in my life. Most of them took place during my late teens, early 20s, and before I reached age 30.
"There were two instances where I was actually in monogamous loving relationships and the other woman was a friend of my then girlfriend. It was something spontaneous after having alcohol and listening to music. The women didn't spend the night either time.
"There wasn't a discussion about it in either instance, and the next morning I woke up almost feeling as if it were a dream. The other women never came by my place again and when we were together socially at events, it was as if it never happened."— Kevin, 60
(Add something extra to your sex life with the JimmyJane Form 8 vibe from the Women's Health Boutique.)
"When I was in high school, I got super high with my girlfriend and this guy we were mutual friends with. I can’t even remember how it happened, but suddenly she was going down on him and I was making out with him. This went on for a long time, like, maybe forty minutes. There was no sex. It was just a weird experience. I’m 100 percent gay so, I’m not even sure why this seemed like a good idea at the time. We never spoke of it again after it happened. I kept dating the same girl for a while. Eventually we broke up for unrelated reasons." — Brittney, 27
"It happened several years ago, with a friend I'd known for some time. We weren't particularly close, but always warm to each other when we were together. She and her fiancé wanted to experiment (we were, then, in our late 30s/early 40s), and I was safe and just outside of their regular, everyday group of friends. It was a loving, friendly experience—he and I decided early on (almost unspoken), that it would be all about giving my friend the ultimate fantasy , so we let her direct the pace and the activities.
"For me, it was an absolutely incredible experience; casual, fun, warm and lighthearted, with incredible passionate feelings wrapped all around. It only happened that one time. I think they've gone on to have a polyamorous relationship and have been together for five or so years now. She and I still write and text with the occasional phone call." — Jake*, 44
"I was out for a friend's birthday, and I told him one of my life goals was to have a threesome with two dudes who weren't creepy. I also said it would probably never happen.
"The next day, the same friend had a party at the apartment he lived in with a bunch of my other friends. A guy started chatting me up, and he seemed nice. Then a guy I'd been laying the groundwork earlier that week showed up. Turned out, they were best friends. I felt a little moral dilemma, since I didn't have a strong opinion about which guy I'd rather be with. They didn't seem to mind that both of them were flirting with me at the same time, though.
"As I got a little drunker, I decided to literally grab one, kiss him real hard, then turn to the other and do the same (my logic in doing that is still a little fuzzy). However, they both decided to roll with it. None of us lived within walking distance, so we ended up hooking up on the stairs to the basement. I ended up with bruises at even intervals on my back—right under my butt, mid-back, and neck.
"While there wasn't any issue in the moment (they were basically like 'we both get to bang the hot chick'), they were also slightly interested in something further with me. But both ended up backing off for the sake of their friendship." — Janet, 28
"My best friend and I met this guy when we were on vacation in Hawaii. We’d never hooked up before, but decided we wanted to have a threesome with this guy. He was a hot, older surfer dude. The threesome started out really well. We were all about it and all a little drunk. After a while, though, it started getting awkward and weird. Going down on a girl I’ve known since I was thirteen, and have been through so much with, made me uncomfortable.
"After it was over, we didn’t talk about it for a couple of days. Eventually, when we got back from vacation, we hashed it out. Things weren’t the same for a long time. We didn’t hang out as much as we used to. It was painful. Luckily, after a year or so we reconnected on a closer level and now things are back to normal. I didn’t expect my threesome experience to affect my relationship with my best friend that much. It was a really eye-opening experience." — Marie, 25
"After ending a five year relationship with a male partner I was really excited to dive back into dating women (duh) and also wanted to enter back into the casual sex arena. I hopped onto the traditional and not so traditional apps (Bumble and Feeld) and ended up quickly clicking with a gorgeous redheaded goddess in a somewhat open marriage.
"After our first date she invited me to a concert with her, her husband and her group of friends. Plenty of drinks later the three of us stumbled into my apartment. I had been a part of a few threesomes before, but never with a married couple and honestly it was the BEST one I have ever been in because of how open everyone was, how well they anticipated what each of them wanted, and also because they were both focused on pleasing me (maybe I just love being the guest star). To be honest, beforehand, the thought of having a threesome with a couple made me nervous because of potential jealousy issues—but there weren't any here." — Lynn, 26
Gigi Engle is a sex educator and writer living in Chicago. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @GigiEngle.

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By Guest | 91 posts, last post a month ago

Kate Smith
answered this
How To Resolve Fights About Sex (Without Ruining Your Relationship)

Hi. I would like to know your opinion about threesomes. What are their effects on relationships? IS it GOOD or BAD?

I tried it once, the W-M-W version, and I could say that it was great. Who am I kidding, it rocked! I did it with my girlfriend and another girl, her friend. And what happened? Whenever I would see her, all I can remember was her vagina stuck in my mouth. So I cheated my girlfriend and ruined a good relationship. I am an id**t.

This was one of the worst things that you can do. We have been married for 30 + years and my husband and I did this and I have become the forgotten one! AND THAT WAS NOT SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN!

My husband can not give both woman the same amount of attention - actually he blows me off a tad bit more cause of her being "new" BS!!!! If anyone should get more attention it should be me as his wife and allowing for this to happen.

Because of all that has taken place over this "threesome" I WOULD NOT tell anyone to go for it! In fact I wish it never happened!

Our marriage because of my jealousy - insecurities - loneliness - low self esteem - whatever has really gone down to the pits!!!

DON'T DO IT!!

I have to say DO NOT DO IT!

I have been married 30 + yrs and I can honestly say it has damaged our marriage. I did think at first that it could be a good thing bring some excitement into our marriage not that we really needed it but couldn't hurt but my husband has no idea how to please 2 women and focus on both women and becasue of that I am the one that got left out.

I guess you can say it was because of me being jealous, left out, low self esteem, insecu
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